What can we learn from Little Mix?
What can we learn about Jesy Nelson from Little Mix?
I don't often write about things such as Little Mix, however in the news recently it has been revealed the one of the members has been suffering from low self-esteem and even made a suicide attempt after being branded as the “fat one from Little Mix.”
Jesy Nelson would search every day online to find what negative comments have been made about her on Twitter. She said it was like an addiction, although her friends told her to ignore it, she was an addict seeking what people were saying about her.
After a TV performance in 2013 she attempted suicide. She was stated as saying "I felt that I physically couldn’t tolerate the pain anymore,"
So what can we learn about this and how could IEMT help her? We are becoming a self-obsessed nation with children spending hours looking at airbrushed pictures of the favourite celebrities on social media. Sadly I don’t see things improving any time soon and we will continually exposed to unachievable ideals in both boys and girls.
Just imagine a young Little Mix fan looking at pictures of Jesy. If she is suicidal about being fat and ugly, what must the young impressionable kids think of themselves?
It is obvious that Jesy has had extensive cosmetic procedures and spends weeks starving herself before binge eating. When you are trying to change your external to fix your internal, then it is a game you simply can’t win. There is no end to how skinny you can become, how plump your lips can be or how perfect your hair.
I am willing to bet that Jesy has experienced negative attention about her weight before she become famous. By being in the band and being put under the media spotlight and triggered he negative beliefs about herself which has resulted in drastic behaviours.
So what is the solution? If I were working with her using IEMT, then I would fully explore the identity issues and labels about being the “fat one from Little Mix.” I would also look at how these negative identities formed earlier in her life. I would also use the negative feeling of pain, as this is what lead her to making a suicide attempt.
It is easy for people to say that you should ignore others and to not let it bother you, but we aren’t like that. When we get triggered, we have an overreaction to something because of what we have experienced in the past. By having IEMT it is possible to lessen the impact of past negative events and update her identity to the present. By literally caring less, she would naturally feel better and when she does see negative comments they shouldn’t mean as much to her.
The worst advice I have seen about this is “just believe you are beautiful and say it 10 times in the mirror every morning.” Affirmations are a terrible way of dealing with a problem. When you have a negative issue, trying to make it positive is creating a time bomb for your future. Adding big happy feelings onto something negative is not the best long term approach. Instead, using a technique like IEMT where you just focus on the negative issues is superior.
Don’t suffer in silence. If you have negative self-beliefs and identities, get help. Don’t try and make yourself beautiful or starve yourself as that is a path to a very dark place.
Matt
Learn more about IEMT here