What 6 years of Mentoring Has Taught Me - Lessons Learned for All Seeking Mentoring

I have been an active mentor for over 6 years on various platforms. Engaging in mentoring has been one of the best things I have ever done. I have been able to connect with so many professionals from all walks of life who have truly taught me so much!

In honor of National Mentoring Month, I wanted to share some things I have learned in my thousands of hours of mentoring.

(Keep in mind, this article is more casual than what I would normally write!)

Takeaways

1)???Conversations are POWERFUL.

Conversations can be impactful. Conversations can be life-altering. Think about it. Most of the ?major events in your life have had lead-up and follow-on conversations that have likely changed the trajectory of your decisions. Whether it was a choice to go to a specific college, go into the military, leave the military, go into a career field, change career fields or more, you can likely pinpoint a conversation (and maybe even with a mentor!) that impacted that choice.

Having a conversation with a mentor can quite literally change your life.

I have had several mentees along the way message me many months or years later with updates after an engagement we had. Some with stories of success and some with stories of learning experiences.

Consider how having a conversation with a mentor might impact your future!

2)???Mentoring is for everyone and at ALL stages of life. Not just transition.

While we heavily emphasize finding a mentor during the transitional stages of our lives (this is especially true for those leaving the military), mentors belong in our lives at every step along the way. In fact, having a trusted advisor or friend can work as a mentor for you.

When I was doing my dissertation research, some of the women veterans I interviewed mentioned that having a mentor while in service would have likely changed their decisions to leave the military or even become mothers while in the military. Think about that! Having a trusted advisor would have made the difference in huge life-altering decisions for these women veterans.

How many times in the last few months have you thought to yourself – “Wish I could bounce this idea off of someone” or “How has this panned out for someone else in my field?” or “Is this a good decision?”

Mentors!

3)???Mentors don’t have to “have it all figured out”.

This one is especially important. Mentors are people too. Most people lean on mentors because of their life experiences.

Consider that! Mentors do not have to have it all figured out. In fact, them giving advice based on their own personal growth and development is probably the best kinds of mentoring out there.

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4)???YOU can be a mentor.

I always encourage those seeking mentorship to become a mentor themselves. Pay it forward. Although many of those who I have mentored often laugh when I suggest this and say “But how can I be a mentor when I don’t have it all figured out?” (Refer to #3!)

The truth is – you have experiences, lessons learned and advice that you can offer to others. Sometimes people seeking mentors aren’t even sure what they’re looking for, they just need a listening ear. Yes, even YOU can be a mentor!

5)???Even the mentor can become the mentee.

I can think of hundreds of conversations I have had where I suddenly became the mentee. I found myself in conversations where I was the one learning and taking away lessons. This is probably one of the best parts about mentoring!

In fact, many of my mentoring relationships have turned into friendships, business associates, and more!

6)???Mentors do not have to be labeled as a ‘mentor’. Mentors come in various forms.

Mentors aren’t often labeled a mentor. They don’t wear a badge around and put Mentor before their first name. They are found everywhere. Some have more professional experience than others. Some have more life experience than others. Some have been down a road we want to explore. Some have amazing life lessons to share. Some are (way) younger than us. Some are from different phases of lives than we are. Some are from the most unexpected places! This is the beauty of mentorship.

Finding a mentor.

There are so many ways you can seek out a mentor. There is truly no wrong or right way to engage in mentoring.

For anyone reading this, you have a Linkedin account. Use it! Start using the platform to seek out those doing things you want to do or would like to do in the future. Reach out, engage. Network. Open yourself up to possibility. If someone does not return a message, don’t let it discourage you. Keep on going. Follow hashtags of interest. Send connection requests.

If you are military-connected, there are various free platforms available to find a mentor immediately.

Check out Veterati, Vets2Industry, or even American Corporate Partners. All are free and available at any time!

Happy National Mentoring Month!

-Dr. Prete

Feel free to check out this article –

The Power of Mentorship: Lessons and Takeaways From the Military and Veteran Communities for Organizations and Practitioners

https://www.siop.org/Research-Publications/Items-of-Interest/ArtMID/19366/ArticleID/7145/The-Power-of-Mentorship-Lessons-and-Takeaways-From-the-Military-and-Veteran-Communities-for-Organizations-and-Practitioners

Resources:

https://www.veterati.com/

https://vets2industry.org/

https://www.acp-usa.org/