WFHWC (working from home with children)

I wrote this a year ago and as sad as it is that we are still trying to survive through this pandemic, I've found that these tips still ring true AND I've added a few updates. I also was told by many friends that this was still helpful for WFH life period:

Working from home during shelter-in-place the last few weeks have been quite a shock to us all with the shelters in place, businesses closing and the fear of a new and devastating virus.

But, guess what’s interesting about that statement? To us all.

We are all in this together, just in different ways. For example, I have the privilege of being able to do my job from home with my 1 year old and 6 year old boys while my husband still goes to work 6 hours a day. I previously worked remotely for nearly a year prior to this abrupt change, however with shelter in place, working with my kids is a different story entirely.

Some days I think, “I’ve totally got this” and others, well let’s not go there for now. Even after reading a lot of how to work from home articles, I’ve had to come up with something that keeps in mind children.

To ensure I can stay productive, positive and patient (ish), I’ve compiled my top 6 tips on how to work from home with children.

Tip 1: Set Up Your Day - Do your commute

Continue to still wake up early enough to get ready for the day. Put on real pants, brush your hair, have your coffee etc.

-Update: I also highly recommend giving yourself a version of a commute. I know, sounds crazy. One of the benefits of WFH is not commuting, right? However commuting gave us some positives. Time to ourselves, chat with people on the phone, a mental cue that the work day was starting or ending. When I worked at HubSpot a couple years ago, a co-worker told me he would literally walk out his front door, take a mini walk around the block and enter his house via a different door. For me, it's my quick drive to my go-to Starbucks. TRY IT.

When you get to your workspace, decide what you are going to accomplish for that day, just the absolute priorities. I still love a planner. I have separate sections for work and life on each day.

If you want to use something on the computer, that works too. (check out Airtable, Trello or Monday as some options) But keep it simple, don’t let it consume you. Which is why I still love pen to paper for this task. By doing this, you are giving yourself a little mental refocus on being able to visualize what you can get done for the day.

-Update: In the last year I moved from a list format to using the Eisenhower matrix since my brain is more mushy and life and work are intertwined now. I highly recommend. (the matrix, not the brain mush)

You still have a CRM, a calendar and who knows what other tools. But you need to show yourself how “do-able” today is going to be. If you get your urgent/important items done and nothing else, you were productive and earned that glass of wine!

Tip 2: Time Block

It’s an art of its own to be disciplined with time blocking. It’s difficult for many to adhere to but it’s absolutely necessary in this situation. I really like an article by Dev that gives simple reasons why time blocking is beneficial, but the most important one for me is that it “minimizes context-switching.” One of the things I hear a lot from those who struggle working from home, is that they bounce around mid task constantly.

For a deeper dive on this topic, you should read this article on how to be indistractible.

Now, add your children. Here’s what you have to do, block the times you are able to get work done without your children. I call them “crunch times” and I have 3 when my kids are either sleeping or I have my husband home. (I call him my manny) I have a room I go into for crunch time, every time. These blocks are for customer “facing” meetings, work that requires your full attention or important internal meetings. Mark these on your calendars and communicate it with your team and your family.

It’s also important to communicate this with those that are external, like customers, who you need to connect with. Automate the ability to set appointments during your crunch times with a scheduling tool. (There's a million out there)

-Update: After a year of this new lifestyle, crunch times are still important but also, trying to work while zoom school is on, families using the wi-fi and maybe dogs needing your attention time blocking has become a little bit harder. We're human and we are all forgiving about what used to seem "unprofessional" if your kid showed in the background (or if you're like me, hog your camera) We're all BBC parents now. Moral of this story? Use your judgement but don't apologize for being a human.

Tip 3: Be Flexible

This may sound counterintuitive to number 2 but when working with children, you must be mobile. When it’s not my “crunch time,” I still have to get work done. With young children, they have to be in my sight at all times. So I literally follow them around with my laptop doing work that I can multi-task with.

This also provides the change of scenery and movement we all need when working throughout the day. When the weather is nice, I try to work outside as much as I can.

You must also be flexible, not just in your physical location but your schedule. Eating times may vary, your kids may need you more than usual, that homeschool assignment may be requiring more brain power than usual. You need to be open minded during your open blocks. You can’t time block every minute of your day with children.

Tip 4: Take Advantage

Take advantage of the fact that you are working from home with your kids. It’s important to take breaks from work. So when you do, make sure you take advantage of something fun with your kids. It could be a nap with them, a project, watch a show they like or go outside and play some games.

You can also throw in a load of laundry or start dinner in a crock pot so that you have more down time later. Give your brain a break and fill that time with your darling children. 

-Update: You can also work from other places! We've gone to San Diego to stay with my mom for a few weeks at a time (sorry mom) because we have the benefit of school and work from anywhere. TAKE ADVANTAGE.

Tip 5: Be Forgiving

Working at home with your children is very challenging. They require a lot of attention, are usually loud and they sure as hell don’t respect boundaries. They are also likely used to exerting more energy if used to go to childcare or school and now they are now exerting that energy in your home.

It’s important to be forgiving with yourself and to others you are working with. We don’t need to add any further pressure to the situation for ourselves so just forgive yourself and others a little more than usual when it comes to working from home with kids around.

As important, be forgiving with your children. They are not used to you working when you are all home, all the time. They used to associate home time as down time with parents so this is also an adjustment for them. They are also not meant to learn from a computer screen all day.

Tip 6: Boundaries

THIS ONE IS MOST IMPORTANT. Don't wake up and check your email on your phone and when work is over, shut down for the day. Your kids (and yourself) have seen enough of you toggling between work and them. It’s easy when working from home to not stop working. It’s difficult enough to create a separation between work and home when you are working, parenting, teaching together all week.

This is where you set your boundaries. By shutting down work time, you will be more productive and more positive. This goes back to the time blocking benefits. You can be more fully present in work mode and parent mode when you make sure to not go back and forth 24/7. If you haven't heard my philosophy on not checking your phone before work starts, hear it here.

-Update: This goes for taking a time off too. Taking care of your mental health is crucial and the pandemic has hit us all hard. Time off is not just for physically sick days. You need to rest or recharge or do anything you need to take care of you on these days too. Thankfully more and more companies are not just supportive of this, but are now being proactive about self care. If your company isn't so open minded about it, then take your deserved time off and it's none of their business why. :)

Practicing these tips have helped me be a more productive contributor to my team at work, while being more present with my kids. Some days I end it going wow I am a BAD ASS BABE. Then other days I am pretty sure I need to crawl into a hole. It’s a work in progress but the overall message here is take it one day at a time. Hang in there parents and caretakers! And yes, that is me in the picture working from home, with children. (WFHWC)