We've been framed

In 2020 it feels like my world has moved into frames. I work in front of the 15-inch frame of my laptop. I meet my colleagues in the even smaller Brady Bunch frames of online meetings. I walk past my kids who are looking into their own tablet frames as they do their schoolwork. Some days I don’t leave the house and my only view of the outside world is through the frames of my windows.

These frames aren’t made to support all the weight the world has placed on us -- a pandemic with no end in sight, a hyperactive news cycle, near daily examples of racial injustice. We’re juggling dueling conference calls while trying to help our kids with math equations we haven’t seen in 20 years or more, and the last thing we’re thinking about is our own health.

We need to, though. This is an unprecedented time, with unprecedented levels of depression. And we need to care for our mental health more than ever. Today is World Mental Health Day, and I hope you’ll use the day as an occasion to ensure you are caring for yourself and your own mental health.

As a trained counselor, I want to offer you these suggestions for staying mentally healthy.

1.      Prioritize self-care. It can be hard to find a few minutes for yourself between adapting to changes at work and managing changes at home. But this is key to a healthy mental state. Take a walk, meditate or maintain an exercise routine. It’s also vital that you eat well and get a good night’s sleep.

2.      Check on each other. The pandemic took physical presence out of many of our relationships with friends, family and colleagues. That doesn’t mean we can’t keep in touch. Set up online visits or pick up the phone. Getting in the habit of connecting with someone once a week is a great way to both give and receive support.

3.      Ask for help. It can be tremendously helpful talking to someone outside your circle. Asking for the help you need isn’t a sign of weakness; it’s a sign that you recognize your limits. Resources are closer than you may think. Start with your company’s employee assistance program (EAP). Most EAPs offer free, confidential assessments and can refer you to online counselors. And if you don’t have access to an EAP, many counselors will work on a sliding fee scale.

4.      Welcome change. No one leads a completely charmed life; everyone has challenges to face. Even if it feels like there’s no end in sight to this pandemic, this too will pass. It’s important to recognize that circumstances are temporary.

5.      Be open to growth. We already know that the ways we work and live will continue to evolve next year, and in the years ahead. Embrace the change! Commit to becoming (or continuing to be) a lifelong learner. Learning a new hobby or just a new recipe can be a fantastic diversion.

I hope you’ll join me in momentarily setting aside the stuff that usually fills the frames in our lives and, in its place, invite your friends, family or a mental health professional to connect and commiserate.