WELLBEING AT WORK: IT’S UP TO YOU (AND YOUR BOSS)

When it comes to the two most important factors in job satisfaction…neither is your job.?

A friend recently observed that most job postings should, like a pack of cigarettes, come with a warning: “This job may be hazardous to your wellbeing.”

And he’s not wrong. Because, as I’ve been telling my mentees for a couple decades, most employers are trying to get as much out of you as they can, for as little as they can get away with. It’s a value exchange that cares not for your sanity. So: Be wary. (Recent research suggests most workplace wellness programs are more cosmetic than effective . It's my belief the onus remains on the individual to look out for their own wellbeing .)

Regardless of how hazardous some jobs are to mental health, here are a couple things that might help you protect yourself.

It's important to note there that, as far as I'm concerned: When it comes to the two most important factors in job satisfaction…neither is your job.

CHOOSE BOSS OVER JOB AND COMPANY.

First, there’s this: Your boss is the second most-important variable in your overall happiness and success. Your boss is more important than the job or the company because that's where the rubber meets the road.

The equation is simple:

?Good job, bad boss: hell.

Good company, bad boss: still hell.

A good boss, however, can transcend a bad job and/or a bad company. And so: Your relationship with your boss is everything. When you consider whether to take a new job, first and foremost you should consider whether your new boss will be a good one . By which I mean: someone who will be an advocate for you, a mentor, and an empathetic friend along the way. (Be wary of people who say things like “it’s not personal, it’s business.” It’s all personal. And lines like that are typically an excuse for being unkind.)

For more about what makes a good (and bad) boss, you can look here .?

BE YOUR OWN BEST ADVOCATE.

And now for the most important variable in your overall happiness and success: It’s you.

Even if you do get a great boss…he or she or they will never be a better advocate for you than you can be for yourself. And so…

The single most important factor in achieving wellbeing and happiness is being true to yourself, an active advocate for what you truly value. And the rub there is this: To do so, you must know who you are (not who your parents or your clergy or your peers or your partner or your teachers or your friends think you should become) and what you value.

?That is, of course, the hardest work there is; and it has to happen inside the office and outside the office, and ideally with the help of a talented therapist operating alongside your own voracious appetite for self-knowledge and growth.

Happiness never arrives from the outside. No company or job or therapist can do the work for you. As the great philosopher Schopenhauer once said: “It is difficult to find happiness within oneself, but it is impossible to find it anywhere else.”?

And if you have a good boss and you know who you are and what you want, the next step is critical:

Ask for what you want , and see what happens. It’s not rocket science, any of this. But it is hard work, and it is, ultimately, up to you to navigate your way to wellbeing and success.

I wish you the very best. And, as always, I'd love to hear from you in the comments. Let me know if this resonates, or if you have any thoughts or related insights to share.

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