The Wellbeing Alternative

Last year my 11-year-old stepson decided to become a pescatarian. This was quite a sudden - if not unexpected – change and, to a part time step mum, quite a disruption to routine and menu choices. During our first pescatarian weekend, it slipped my mind, and I knocked up some pretty special sausage baps. I called up the stairs ‘how many sausage baps do you want?’ A gentle pause followed, then tentatively the word ‘sausage?’ About now, I remembered. ‘Yup. Sausage.’ I said, cringing. A melancholy voice said, ‘just one’. At this point I rushed to the kitchen to knock up some fish finger baps for him ... but he came to the kitchen expecting to have to eat his sausage bap begrudgingly, rather than risk saying anything that might cause upset. So we talked about the ways to politely remind people of his choices, and ask if there is an alternative. And off he went with his fish finger bap.

It struck me that we can be determined about our own values, principles and intentions, but that a lack of courage could so easily derail us. As we are encouraged more and more to consider our own wellbeing - at work and at home - we may need to find positive and rational ways to challenge the workplace requests, actions and offers of others so that we can focus on our wellbeing without risk to our relationships, our reputation or our performance. Here are three typical workplace scenarios that might create such a challenge.

The team are ordering in a pizza so that the meeting can continue through lunch.

Here’s the problem. A stodgy lunch will slow you down in the afternoon and no fresh air during the day can hinder both health AND work performance.  

What’s the wellbeing alternative?

1.     Firstly, look for opportunities to rethink the meeting. Is it right to continue or should you reschedule? Some time out might help. If it’s your regular meeting, make some changes to the purpose, flow, attendance and scheduling. If you’re an attendee, propose some.

2.     Consider an alternative to pizza so that attendees have choices. It might be quick and convenient but may not power you up for the afternoon. Add some healthy options too - some salads, fruit, smoothies. According to an article in Harvard Business Review in 2014, “Food has a direct impact on our cognitive performance, which is why a poor decision at lunch can derail an entire afternoon.”. Healthier food choices can help to maintain personal energy, attention span and motivation.

3.     Ask for at least a 10-15-minute break that allows participants to go outside, get some air, have a stroll. Why not take the meeting for a walk? If you stay in the office, you breathe the same air throughout the day, and the oxygen content goes down. The result is that breathing stale air won't supply your body with the fresh oxygen in needs and you may suffer from headaches fatigue dizziness etc. Providing your body with more and fresher oxygen can help to bring a greater clarity to the brain so you’ll think better.

Your virtual international team need you on a call at 10pm.

Here’s the problem. It’s late. You’ve been at work all day. You’ll be back in the office tomorrow morning. You may have other priorities in the evening - family, hobbies, evening class - and you may be made to feel that these are less important.

 What’s the wellbeing alternative?

1.     Find or suggest alternatives to the call at that time. Objectively explain your rationale. Can the call time be changed to a more suitable time? Can the call go ahead without you? Can it be recorded? Can someone else represent you? Can you send your input for review without being present?

2.     If you have to be on the call, can you come into the office slightly later the next day? This will allow you to recoup the personal ‘switch off’ time that you have lost and may mean you can reschedule your personal commitments.

3.     Challenge yourself. Are you begrudgingly accepting the calendar invite because you are concerned about missing out, or about how it will be perceived if you’re not present? For many reasons, the world of work has become something of an ‘always on’ culture, and not being able to switch off means that our minds can be overactive, and this can cause tiredness, reduced sleep, less energy at work, less creativity. Make the right choice for your wellbeing, not just because it’s what others would expect.

You’ve got a problem with the product, and your customer isn’t happy. You’ve been at it for hours, but you now realise you’re going to have to stay late to find a solution.

Here’s the problem. You’ve been at it for hours and not found a solution. What will change in the next few hours? Pushing at the same closed door in the same way won’t make it open. You need to find other ways to stimulate your mind or generate ideas.

What’s the wellbeing alternative?

1.     Involve a team. Gather some colleagues and get brainstorming. Briefly explain your challenge and then ask them to brainstorm ideas - however crazy - onto post its that you can take away and review. You never know what might come up. MIND (www.mind.org.uk) say that when employees feel involved it increases motivation, so asking people for suggestions can be good for them, and for you.

2.     Practice mindfulness. Use an app to guide you through a short mindful meditation (can be as little as 10 minutes) to free your thinking and get your creative juices flowing.

3.     Take a walk. Research has shown that just the presence of a ceiling can limit our ‘free thinking’. Being out in the fresh air can generate fresh thinking, open our minds and enable us to think ‘out of the box’.

What you can do

As a team member with a personal focus on your wellbeing, be assertive about your choices, and don’t feel pressured into going with the flow of everyone else. Have the courage to ask for reasonable wellbeing alternatives to be considered when faced with unhealthy practices at work.

As a leader, encourage and enable those who are making choices about their own wellbeing. Recognise their needs, and where it is possible, seek to accommodate them. Challenge your own objections to their needs – are your concerns reasonable and rational or just traditional? They may not match how you might do things, but wellbeing is an individual concern, as well as an organisational one, and you and your team may benefit from meeting, maybe matching and adopting, their wellbeing approaches.

My stepson was a pescatarian for about 4 weeks. Once on holiday in the US, the whiff of a burger became just too much for him and he decided to revert. Fad or not, it was important for those around him to respect his choices at that time - and for him to learn how to assertively stand by those choices in the face of a sausage bap. We need to enable and encourage ourselves and those who work for us to do the same.

In 50 Tools for Employee Wellbeing, I have provided a range of tools, including some of those mentioned above, that help individuals and organisations build and maintain resilience, health and happiness for themselves or their employees. We can all take some actions and implement some ideas that can promote and encourage wellbeing without incurring significant cost.  Click here to order your copy of 50 Top Tools for Employee Wellbeing and get 20% discount using the code AHREW20 at the checkout.