WelCoMinG 2021: 5 steps to being your ultimate self
All the inspiration I need to be the ultimate version of myself

WelCoMinG 2021: 5 steps to being your ultimate self

For about 5 years now I always used to complete a little diagram at the start of the year called "Health, Happiness and Success". It helped me frame out the year by trying to improve on the last - being intentional about my actions. For me, it was better than just listing out a bunch of New Year's resolutions somewhere that weren't necessarily connected to anything but hope or early-year intention. By framing and attaching these hopes and intentions under three meta-themes, it helped me think of the right things and made them more likely to be actionable giving me a better chance of achieving my goals for the year.

That said, a lot has changed in the last 2 years and it's time for a new framework. I no longer run a high impact not-for-profit, I no longer live in the NYC area, I'm no longer single, and I no longer have buddies just a few minutes away for post work meet ups. Then, there's all the Covid stuff. Together, it's a lot to unpack for sure. But here's the thing - once I unpack it, so much of it is positive (yep - even the Covid stuff). It's rather, that there were parts of the framework that were missing, yet prevalent in my life, and as the related actions weren't being recognized or documented, I perhaps took them for granted, or at least wasn't being as intentional as I could have been to improve them. These components were largely driven around serving others (contribution) and living my purpose (meaning), both of which have been referred to in hundreds (likely thousands) of books, podcasts and articles as core elements of humanity, of experiencing fulfillment, actualization and (in some instances) happiness. I was serving and living my purpose (part at least) but at the same time, going through the motions. Things had gotten a little stale. I needed a re-boot, if I wanted to be my ultimate self.

So, after now nearly 2 years in Colorado, in a new role, with a new family and building a new network of friends, I have a different perspective. Of course, with the Covid hangover continuing for us all over year-end, that perspective changed further. So, I came up with a new framework that captures everything I want to be - the whole of me (good, bad and ugly), the best version of me - in combination - my ultimate self. I can't control Covid, in fact, there's a lot in my life I can't control (like getting my son Hudson to go to bed). However, I can absolutely define the ultimate version of myself and, for sure, have control over living that version of me. We all do.

The Framework Components (along with definitions, courtesy of dictionary.com) are:

1) Wellness: "the quality or state of being healthy in body and mind, especially as the result of deliberate effort." Incidentally, when I think about wellness, I think about mental, physical, social, emotional and social. So when you work through the framework, think through all these aspects.

2) Contribution: "the act of giving" (extrapolated version). Think family, friends, community, colleagues, causes.

3) Meaning: "the end, purpose or significance of something." To help frame this, I use my own version of Ikigai (in Japanese - a reason for being) - what I'm passionate about, best at, can earn a living at and can make a difference doing.

4) Growth: "the act or process, or manner of...development". Growth is a personal thing but for all of us, it starts with self reflection, self-awareness and must come from a place of truth. For me, it's about getting better at a few things I aspire to be, and for pushing my boundaries a bit through new experiences, challenges, or regular flow activities.

My view is, if I practice, appreciate and improve intentionally under each of these 4 things to the best of my ability, I will go-forward as my ultimate self. 2021 will be a slam dunk (and that's from someone who can hardly clip the net with his finger...the very epitome of white men, can't jump)! Nevertheless, the slow motion visual of me actually nailing a slam dunk is exactly what finishing the year as my ultimate self would feel like - bloody incredible!

In addition to setting me up for success this year as I go-forward, going through process itself was really rewarding. So, rather than share my finished product (I'll just share snippets as helpful), I want to share with you the process I went through in case you feel it would be valuable for you, too. Now, it's up to you where you want to do this. I chose a little brewery (I am in Colorado after all) with Covid compliant outdoor (tent-heated) seating. What can I say - a cheeky IPA gets my creative juices flowing! The point is, you'll need some thinking space - so pick whatever works for you.

Right, so let's begin your journey to going-forward as your ultimate self:

All you have to do is write down the answers to these questions:

  1. For each of the 4 areas of Wellness, Contribution, Meaning and Growth (and feel free to tweak these if there are 4 more important to you), how would you score your current self on a scale of 1 - 10?
  2. Fast forwarding to the end of 2021, how would you summarize a 'state of success' for each? It should represent an ongoing practice or state / outcome that would keep you on track. Feel free to scribble down a few - whatever comes to mind. Try now, to summarize it in 3 - 5 words. Here are mine, in case they help: wellness: "prepared to perform"; contribution: "elevate others"; meaning: "lead with legacy"; growth: "better everyday".
  3. Take a look at your score from #1 for each area. Now write various practices (actions you repeat) under each area that you believe (based upon the whole you - your good, bad and...dare I say ugly) would get your score to a 10. Now, circle or summarize as your top 3 - 5 for each area.
  4. Now it's time for your ultimate self statement. It should be no more than 2 - 3 short sentences, representing the essence of what you have come up with so far. That's the hard work done and it may be time to take a break (or order another IPA)!
  5. Finally, take all the content and summarize your 'state of success' statements, your top 3 - 5 practices and your ultimate self statement, onto a page. Set it up however you like. I created a space in the middle of the page for my ultimate self statement and then split the rest of the page around it into 4 segments, with W, C, M, G headings and 'state of success' sub-headings.

Here's the framework I drafted up. (Clearly for me - so apologies for my handwriting)!

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As you'll see once you complete this, it's an easy template to review, and to remind and inspire you that your ultimate self is right there on the page. The best part is it's up to you to make it (you) a reality by jumping off the page and integrating those practices into your life.

If you'd like to share the love and inspire some others with your one pager, take a photo and share in the comments below. If you enjoyed the process, please share what specifically you enjoyed, or perhaps found challenging / insightful. If you're stuck and need some inspiration, shoot me a message. I'll share my Ultimate Self one pager with you, if you'll share yours with me, once done. Reason being - while, we're in control of being the ultimate version of ourselves - it's absolutely proven by tons of research that we all benefit from a support team (and from supporting others). So, I'm happy to join yours.

So, here's to our ultimate 2021. After all- there's only going to be one of them, so we might as well nail it by going forward as the ultimate version of ourselves!

I'm writing a lot more regularly again this year (I have to - it's in my Ultimate Self one pager). So, I'd be super grateful that if you like this article, or feel it could be helpful to someone else you know - please like and/or share. Any insights, inspiration or intentions you'd like to share, please add to the comments below.



Ari Christakis

Attorney at Buckley, Brion, McGuire & Morris LLP

3 年

Great stuff, Mark. Cheers!

回复

Great stuff! As always, thank you for sharing, Mark Griffin MBE

Craig Chapman CPMR

Territory Development Representative at PEI-Genesis

3 年

Just starting a new job this week and getting back into a longer term mindset, will give this a go.

Ben Astin

Head of Brand Partnerships | Impact-driven ROI for Shopify

3 年

Cracking pic mate...and this is really useful too. I’ll have a go and let you know how I get on! Wishing you the best for 2021 Mark

Fiona Welch

Marketing Strategist | Partnerships/Sponsorship Specialist | Building Governance Experience

3 年

Nice one Mark! My framework for myself for the past year has been exploring Opportunity, Purpose and Community...these three things have given me direction and focus in a challenging year, and are still continuing to guide me in 2021 ??

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