“Welcome to Education: Where Standardized Testing Reigns and Life Skills Are Optional!”

Rainbow had another outrageous, frustrating and unnecessary experience with school and the testing process, regardless of her IEP.

I am one exhausted parent. I will keep writing emails to politicians and the press. I will not allow a twisted, broken and helpless system bring us to the brink of seeking therapy -- Yes, that's the next step. We need tools to seek balance and survive the next 1.5 years.

I resort to sarcasm and comedy to share our reality -- and that of many others.

If you happen to know of someone I can reach out to, and gain insight and answers and support needed change - please send them my way!

This micro script was created with the support of AI (luvvv Chat Gpt)

Scene: A conference room filled with parents, students, and administrators. A frustrated parent, Karen, is passionately addressing the school board, with her teenage son, Jake, next to her, rolling his eyes in classic teenage disinterest.

Karen: “So let me get this straight—you’re saying my son Jake, who has an IEP, needs to focus more on... algebra? The same Jake who struggles with ‘left’ and ‘right’? I’m all for education, but teaching him to factor polynomials while he’s still hazy on where his feet go in a three-step dance feels, how do I put this… slightly counterproductive?”

Administrator (with forced enthusiasm): “Yes, but standardized testing is our gold standard! It ensures everyone meets the same criteria for success. We’ve got to make sure he’s ready for… well, filling in bubbles correctly. Those bubbles don’t fill themselves; you know!”

Jake: “Yeah, because nothing says ‘life-ready’ like stressing out over multiple-choice questions I’ll never think about again. What’s next? ‘How to Write Your Name on a Scantron 101’?”

Karen: “Exactly! Meanwhile, here I am, asking when Jake will learn some actual life skills—like paying bills, grocery shopping, managing stress without eye rolls. But no, apparently, ‘life prep’ comes in the form of the quadratic formula. His teachers told me he’s ‘just got to push through.’ Push through to what? Algebra II therapy?”

Administrator (nervous chuckle): “We do cover a lot of life lessons. Why, even with the algebra, he’s learning persistence. Think of it as preparation for the real world. And hey, when he’s 35 and struggling to tip a waiter, he’ll be glad he knows his integers!”

Jake: “Oh yeah, I’m sure that’ll come in handy when I’m trying to figure out how to parallel park. ‘Oh, no problem! I can just use the Pythagorean theorem, right?’”

Karen: “Meanwhile, parents like me are over here losing it because the only ‘IEP support’ I see is a relentless drive for him to meet goals that were created before anyone bothered asking what he actually needs. Let’s talk about goals that make sense. Like… ‘Not Freaking Out Every Time Someone Mentions Finals’ or ‘Social Skills 101: The Art of Responding to “How Are You?” without Looking Panicked.’”

Administrator: “We hear you, Mrs. Johnson. Truly, we’re working on providing more tailored support. Why, just this year, we’ve implemented a 20-minute career day… in which students get to hear about job options from a lawyer, a doctor, and a marketing executive. You know, to really inspire them.”

Karen: “Wow, real forward-thinking. A day of listening to adults talk about careers he’s already decided he definitely doesn’t want. Maybe next year, we could try something actually useful, like showing him how to change a tire or talk to a bank teller?”

Jake: “Or we could work on teaching administrators that ‘real-world skills’ are a little different from ‘pretend algebra emergencies’?”

The administrator nervously shuffles his papers, desperate to redirect the conversation.

Administrator: “Look, our goal is to ensure Jake and other students feel included in the educational experience.”

Karen: “Included? You mean when he sits through two hours of math he doesn’t need, just so he can ‘pass’ a test that even the adults barely understand? If ‘included’ means sitting in a class that makes him feel alienated and overwhelmed, then… mission accomplished!”

Jake: “Yeah, my only IEP goal now is ‘survive this system with minimal scarring.’ That’s realistic, right?”

Administrator (mutters): “Standardized testing is important…”

Karen: “And so is Jake’s sanity!”

Curtain falls.

#standardizedtesting #therapy #IEP #studentswithautism

U.S. Department of Education The Arc Davidson County & Greater Nashville Disability Insider