Welcome to the BetterMen Bulletin

Life is busy and time is precious. This monthly bulletin saves you time and effort by providing you with a range of resources relating to all things men and mindset.

Don’t just read the quotes. Instead, take a moment to consider them and hold them up against your life.

This month’s quote theme is:?Avoidance.

Avoidance is a coping strategy, frequently employed by men as an active escape from some form of stressful situation: work challenges, marital conflict, accepting a difficult reality etc. From time to time, we all avoid dealing with our problems; however, when avoidance becomes a repeated behaviour, it can be detrimental to our daily lives, and our future. Avoidance falls into two main categories. Firstly, cognitive avoidance is achieved by diverting thoughts away from the stressor. Secondly, behavioural avoidance, where one employs physical behaviours to escape from the reality of a stressor.

Consider how avoidance shows up in your life by bringing attention to the quotes.

Sit down, take a minute, read, reflect or journal on the prompts presented.

This month’s prompt theme is:?Appreciation.

Appreciation is one of life’s greatest motivators. When we take the time to appreciate ourselves, someone else, or something we experience, it creates a sense of value and promotes an ‘attitude of gratitude’. Appreciation is the gift that keeps on giving and yet for many men, those frantically firefighting through life, it’s often absent from their experience. Did you know, research has shown that appreciation enables people to savour positive experiences, cope with stress, and strengthen social relationships?

Reflect on appreciation by completing the prompts below:

I. The things I appreciate about myself are…

II. If I paid more attention to the things I value, what I might notice is…

III. The three ways I could demonstrate my appreciation of others more include…

This month’s BetterMen video is:?Work First, Family Second.

Men aged 40-59 are statistically speaking, the least happy and most anxious demographic in the UK. It’s around this time that life can transition from being an engaging ride to a meaningless shuffle. If you’re feeling this way about yourself and your life, having a bias toward action will help you re-engage in your life in new and empowering ways. Having a greater bias toward action will also enable you to move away from avoidance and toward appreciation – two of the points above.

This month’s podcast recommendation is:?The High-Performance Podcast.

Matthew Syed is known around the world as an author and thought leader. In this episode, he shares his insight into education, parenthood and leadership. Also explored are taking risks, creating a space for vulnerability in the workplace, the importance of cognitive diversity and how to find purpose in our lives. It’s a thoroughly worthwhile investment of time. Take a listen.

This month’s book recommendation is:?The Good Life.

Based on findings from the 80-year-long Harvard Study of Adult Development, this landmark book reveals the simple yet surprising truth: the stronger our relationships, the more likely we are to live happy, satisfying and overall healthier lives. Dr Robert Waldinger and Dr Marc Schulz bring together scientific precision, traditional wisdom, incredible real-life stories and actionable insights to prove that our ability to flourish is absolutely within our control.

This month’s TED Talk is:?What Really Matters at The End of Life.

This recommendation is brought on by several clients recently experiencing, or expecting to experience, the passing of loved ones. Using empathy and a clear-eyed view of mortality, BJ Miller shines a light on health care's most ignored facet: preparing for death. He questions, at the end of our lives, what do we most wish for? For many, it's simply comfort, respect and love. Take the time to savour this moving talk.

I’d almost forgotten what a wet and windy Men & Mountains felt like - the last time I wore my waterproof jacket was in July, on a not so sunny, but successful, Yorkshire 3 Peaks attempt. Alas, the weather provided a testing environment for our nearly 9-miler. Despite the weather and a somewhat challenging route selection, conversation and morale were high.

The conversation topic for this month’s walk was: If you paid more attention to your life, what might you notice…? An interesting question, one that enabled the 23 men present to share, without judgement, some of their life challenges.

Next month, sixteen of us are departing Wales and heading to the Lakes District. We have three quality mountain days, guided by Sam Marshall. We’ll be taking on Scafell via the Corridor route, Helvellyn via Striding Edge and Blencathra via Sharpe edge.

Wish us luck - or join our next walk in Wales on Sunday 28 May.

In conjunction with BetterMen client,?Matt Bowring of Good Body Stuff, The BetterMen Bulletin brings you a monthly workout. Matt’s a master of his craft; a certified strength conditioning coach and trusted to support A-list actors from productions such as HBO, Sky and Disney Lucasfilms.

This month’s workout is titled:?This workout is called "For Dan".

It's an AMRAP (As Many Rounds As Possible) in 30 minutes consisting of just 6 bodyweight exercises. It’s a bit of a beast but a great all-around conditioning session.

I trust you’ve found this month's BetterMen Bulletin useful.

If you have,?pass it forward?and share it with other men?who you feel would benefit from receiving this monthly.

Don’t forget, the next BetterMen Bulletin will be arriving in your inbox on the?first Tuesday in May.

Yours in becoming better,

Dan Stanley

Founder

BetterMen

[email protected]

07834456488 - Work

www.better-men.uk

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