The Weight of Invisibility

I was born with Ankylosing Spondylitis (AS). Living with AS feels like carrying a 50-pound bag of sand on your back 24/7. It’s an invisible weight that crushes your spirit as much as it strains your body. It’s the feeling of being trapped in a body that constantly betrays you. The physical pain is relentless, but it’s the mental and emotional toll that truly defines the experience.

For years, as a survival mechanism, I masked my suffering—smiling and pretending to be "fine" to navigate a world that often doesn’t understand or accommodate chronic illnesses, especially invisible ones. But the truth is, it’s exhausting to pretend you’re okay when you’re in constant pain, an ever-present reminder of your own fragility.

Amidst the sea of pain pills prescribed to me as a teenager, I discovered cannabis—and it changed my life. Unlike the pills, cannabis didn’t just dull the pain; it allowed me to accept it. It gave me a sense of freedom and release. It wasn’t about getting high; it was about living my life without being held hostage by my chronic illness and reclaiming some of the freedom that AS had stolen.

I view cannabis, not as a recreational drug, but as a tool to navigate the complexities of living with an invisible, chronic disease. It’s helped me to accept the pain and to find moments of peace within the chaos.

Now, I’m dedicated to breaking down the stigmas surrounding cannabis and advocating for its potential as a healing modality. Through my work, I hope to inspire others to embrace open and honest conversations and to find their own paths to freedom and healing.