Week 22.27 Life Expansive

This past weekend I was fortunate enough to get away for the weekend with plans to disconnect, relax and recharge. I have been thinking a lot recently about creating more space to be creative and to focus on what it means to have The Earned Life. I had determined that I would carve out meaningful chunks of time during the weekend for reflection and introspection in addition to outdoor activities and enjoying being with friends and family. A lightning strike at 5 am Saturday morning woke us up with a big bang and took out the neighbor's EV, which had to be towed. It also took out our cable and internet. With limited cell service, we had a forced disconnect that I quickly realized felt different from an optional one. The cable company gave us an appointment with a technician for Monday.

There was no reason to complain and every reason to be grateful. We have access to great hiking, small boats, and good food. Lily was preparing gourmet meals with great local ingredients. And I had wanted to spend some time disconnected, but the forced disconnect felt very different. My original idea was to carve out some time; in my mind, I imagined a cofferdam, the dry space created when building bridges. Somehow I had determined that creating dry space in a river was an elegant metaphor for creating space to think and imagine. With no internet, cable, or little cell, my cofferdam was not needed since the river was dry. We started playing Mad Libs.?

As I settled into the experience of scarcity, I started to feel how it was actually creating abundance. I started reading a book Ayse Birsel recommended four months ago and found it delightful. My usual habit of not checking email for 15 min while reading lengthened since there was no email to check. My attention span gradually lengthened to accommodate the new reality. I stopped thinking about which movie I might watch since there was literally nothing on. And I stopped checking my phone since it had also stopped calling. The lack of connectivity was not making me "less productive"; it created more time for thinking, space for relaxing, and energy for imagining.?

I suspect many of you are thinking, somewhat like I am that we all know this is true and that we need to get away from our phones, computers, and connections and start listening to our inner voices and connecting with others. We also know that the best minds in the world are working on developing hardware, software, offers, and attractions to distract us. We don't stand a chance unless we intentionally take the time back. But the rewards are real. By Sunday, I could start seeing my time expansively rather than carved out of my other obligations. Instead of constrained, time was generous. It did not hold me to responsibilities, appointments, tasks, and deliverables. It opened me to new ways of thinking and experiencing.

In life and leadership, we have an opportunity to give those we lead and love the experience of seeing our time with expansive eyes. We can set the example by living a rich life when we shift from living moment to moment to living in the moment. The unrequested gift of disconnection gives me a chance to examine with stark contrast the difference between seeing time as blocks that can be carved up rather than as waves that can be surfed. Now that service has been restored, I am exploring how I will deploy this daily. I want to understand what I mean by opening space instead of making space. The bolt of lightning literally jolted me back into remembering that life is not a series of tasks but rather establishing more significant goals and creating time by living expansively.

"We Don't Dream of Labor." Unpacking the Anti-Ambition Movement by Rahaf Harfoush

Prior generations were told that their ambition would pay off, and not just with professional accomplishment but with the opportunities to live a better life. Many people today feel hopeless about their future and about the world. In Hustle & Float, I wrote about the generational promises that were made. Boomers were told that if they worked hard they would get a pension, afford a home, and be able to retire. Xers were told if they worked hard they would be financially better off than their parents. Millennials were told that we were special, and that if we worked hard the world would reward us financially, spiritually, and emotionally through our dream jobs and dream lives. I believe that Gen Z is the first generation without a clear promise. They have grown up, digitally connected, but watching their millennial siblings navigate these harsh economic conditions, not to mention the uncertainty of climate change and the pandemic during their formative years. The stories we've been told of the payoff of ambition are an essential part of our work mythology and now that story is being challenged. When I hear leaders today complain that "no one wants to work," I think they have completely missed the point or the severity of what is currently happening to the labor market. From Rahaf's newsletter The Digital Culture Club

Signs You And Your Leadership Are Becoming Obsolete by Ruth Gotian

Rigid rules, control, rigidity, and fear. It is an authoritarian course of action generations of leaders used. Times have changed. If you are a leader and keep up this historic style, you will soon be obsolete. Instead, the new effective approach successful leaders embrace is one filled with authenticity, compassion, and alignment.?‘Control and command’ is not an effective leadership style. It causes your team to find you unrelatable and inauthentic. You simply will not earn their trust. Without their trust, you cannot lead. In her new book,?The Seismic Shift in Leadership, Dr. Michelle Johnston shares that in this new era, leadership has pivoted from power to connection. The ‘command and control’ management style is a thing of yesteryear. Today, employees are more vocal and will not stand for this. Keep up the archaic practices and you will be a leader without anyone left to lead.

Leader Development and Coaching for the Next Generation 7/6/22 @12pm EDT

Julie Carrier, Founder of The Leadership Development Institute for Young Women, is leading a movement to bring world-class leadership development and coaching—normally reserved for the C-Suite—to impact young people when it can have the most impact—high schools. Supported by many of the world’s foremost experts in leader development, including Carol Kauffman PhD, 100Coaches and Thinkers50, she is the lead developer of The Leadership Course, the first evidence-based, applied neuroscience leadership and coaching curriculum that is taught during the high school academic school day. Julie is changing the paradigm of secondary education and business leadership with the radical idea that leader development and executive coaching shouldn’t be reserved for already senior employees, but should be something teens experience during their most formative years of development. For this, and the rest of her inspirational work, Julie was shortlisted for the hashtag#Thinkers50 Coaching and Mentoring Award, is recognized as the World’s #1 Coach for Young Women by Marshall Goldsmith. Please click here to register