Wear the dress. Don't let the dress wear you.

It's one week until my birthday during a year full of surprises, most of them let downs. As I sit across from my 90 year old neighbor, I am smiling. It's hard for me to remember the last time that I really smiled. She and I are talking about life, and how attitude takes such a huge part in our happiness. And, I think that even though I seem even keeled, she can tell that I am stressing over things.

She tells me how I am still young, and beautiful. She tells me that there are still many years for jobs, relationships, friendships and laughter. And, then she compares life to a little black dress. "You wear the dress. Don't let the dress wear you."

I went back into my condo. I sat down, and I started to have surge of memories flow through my head. For days, my life felt like a struggle. I kept asking myself if it was all worth it.

Was it worth it to fight at the age of 5 after being in a major car accident? Was it worth it to fight to get a degree that at some point I may not be able to use? Is it worth it to keep clamoring away at a job search within an industry that constantly rejects me for all of the things that in their eyes I haven't done right?

Most of us have dealt with adversity at some point in our lives. For me, it feels like I have encountered it each year for the last 35. But, I am still here. And, I still have the option to take control of my life and make the best of it irregardless of what others have to say.

I don't have to take a job at a company where the culture doesn't feel right. I don't have to work for an employer who doesn't take the time to really know me or my why. I don't have to work for a company that only offers a commission basis. I could choose to keep going. I could choose to go out and "wear the dress". I could wake up, dress up and show up everyday even if it was at my personal computer looking for my next opportunity.

This morning, as I type this, my whole attitude during the search process has changed. I have two options: 1) get frustrated over a hiring process that I can't control or 2) keep going irregardless. So many times in my life, I was frustrated over things that I couldn't change. So many times, I found a way to come out on top.

In one week, I will be celebrating my birthday. In one week, I will be celebrating all of the possibilities of good things to come. In one week, I will learn to "wear the dress and not let the dress wear me". Who knew that the best advice that I have gotten all year would've come from a conversation that I started with a woman who taught me to see me with a different pair of eyes? Our experiences in our lives are what make us great. The good ones, and the bad ones. Even a good dress gets wrinkles, but if we wear it right, it still looks beautiful.