We Need to Train Our Capacity for Fear
Olesya Luraschi
Empowering Leaders for Transformation & Success | Leadership & Executive Coach | Speaker & Psychology Lecturer | Startup Advisor
I often say the human mind is not made to help you succeed in business, or create a worthwhile life and career. The human mind is meant to save energy and keep you alive.?
As a result of these two motivations—saving energy and keeping us alive—the mind produces a lot of fear in order to prevent us from taking unnecessary risks.?
For many people, most things are unesserary risk at this point. A large portion of the developed world has its needs met and is not at risk of going hungry or being in any real danger.?
The bigger danger for most people in the developed world is living a life that is too small for them because they listen to the fear signals in their minds.?
You have probably had this experience, you would think of an idea that is exciting. Creating a talk, going for the promotion, and quitting to start your own business.?
You know this idea will set you on the path you want for your life.?
Then, a few days later, you drop it and go back to your usual routine.?
Why?
You listened to the fear.?
One of the problems in our society is that we fear negative emotions, particularly fear.?
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We do not understand them as a normal part of the human mind.?
So when you think of doing something with some risk, you naturally feel fear.?
Yet since fear feels painful, we tend to want to avoid it. Therefore, we avoid the behavior that makes us feel fear. Eventually, we get used to this way of life, and don’t ever consider that we could overcome it.?
Yet, just like the human body, the human mind can also be trained. We can train our capacity to feel fear.?
Essentially, if we expose ourselves to any stimuli enough, we will become desensitized to them.?
When it comes to fear, we tend to avoid and repress it, therefore never increasing our capacity to feel fear.?
In order to do the things you know you need to and to create the life you want, you need to train yourself to feel fear.?
One way I have my clients do it is through an exercise in which you can set a five minute timer on your phone every morning. Sit in a quiet place. Close your eyes. Imagine all the things you are scared of. Imagine that your fear is like an old radio volume dial. You can turn up the volume or you can turn it down. Try turning up your fear, try to feel more fear.?
Be careful not to just think about it; actually feel it. Emotions are felt in the body. Feel all the changes that fear creates, faster heartbeat, sweaty palms, and shallow breathing.?
Become accustomed to feeling fear and not doing anything to avoid it. This way, you will train yourself to separate fear from avoidance. By doing this, you will create in yourself the capacity to act even when you feel normal human fear.