We need to talk.

I’ve got a list of things I can write about here.?

It’s an actual ink list on a real piece of paper written in my own sideways, quick-jot handwriting.? I keep it nearby so it’s there whenever ideas arise. Lately, I’ve jotted down things like… time as an opponent... grief as love persisting... too much is too much... and others.?

Today, I’m shoving those aside to express what I feel is most essential right now.?

Because, you know, I think we need to talk.?

And I do mean talk. This is a newsletter, so it is only a start, a seed of an idea, a jumping off point. It’s not talking—unless you comment. In which case, as you might have noticed, I always reply. That is still not talking, but it's a good beginning. ?

So let's talk. All of us. To each other. More.?About real things. Important things.

Already you see my bias, that some things are more real and important than others. You’ll find my bias throughout this writing. I think we have become afraid of that, but all ideas are biased just as all things are relative.?It's the nature and beauty of talking to discover where another is leaning.

It feels to me as if some invisible set of magnets meant to attract us to each other have turned themselves around inside of us. We are more repelled than before, as least as far as I can see. I understand that the weight of everything we are overwhelmed with can make us want to push each other away. Our independent society makes us feel we have to handle it all solo. But we can change that, too. It will take effort, and risk, and often a daring gesture of hope, but as conscious leaders, we know how to do that.

So here’s what I think we might talk about, as a start.

Of course, what I think is not going to be exactly what you think we need to talk about, and probably not where we would end up by the end of our conversation. Which I think is a good thing. At a minimum, I hope a few ideas here will ignite a few ideas in you and maybe even an urge, an impulse, and an action toward more talking with someone.

• We need to talk about human-to-human collaboration, what we want to create together, with or without profit in mind. We’ve always been better together. My lone hero is running out of steam, courage, hope… How about yours? With others, I’m in it again. Not every idea is for me. Not every idea is for you. Not every collaboration works. But some do, and it’s fun exploring.??
• We need to talk about why we have become so in need of a sense of “safety” lately and why our psyches have become so vulnerable. Why our kids and grandkids are struggling with the sense that everything risky is potentially threatening and likely damaging. What we can do to be parents and grandparents in such a culture? ?
• We need to talk about why we don’t talk to our neighbors, especially when we are so similar that we have found ourselves next door to each other. We must have much in common. I had a short-notice talk with two people who live in my condo building this week because one sent out a notice inviting everyone to our local wine and cheese bar downstairs. Only three of us gathered, but that was lovely. We talked. (If you are in the Annapolis/DC area especially, join me sometime. I am told I’m quite approachable.)
• We need to talk about the beauty of the ugly, and the ugly in what so many have come to call beauty. I love the beauty of a girl with long, muscular legs who can do ab exercises in front of a bunch of strangers at a park (I saw her this weekend, so delightfully full of herself and her personal physical prowess). But I’ve also experienced that the conversation with young adults rarely goes beyond the limits of culture. It may be because our young people are rarely invited into deeper conversations. I don’t know. I will also say that I love the wrinkle-ladden beauty of an old woman who is almost ready to transition to the world beyond this one, or whatever it is that lays waiting for her. I am always curious what such a woman has in mind at any given moment, what she knows that I don’t yet know if only by virtue of our age gap and differing life experiences. It’s just as difficult to get her to talk as the younger woman, though maybe for different reasons. I imagine—but do not know—she’ll be more likely to not suffer fools, which any clumsy attempt at conversation might reveal me to be.?
• We need to talk about politics more, not less, but from a higher level, please. Not about the this-that political problem de jour and what we are sure upon sure is true, but how politics as a whole might not be serving us the way it once did. How it might even have begun to warp us, separate us, make us less human. How when good people do bad things to become the winner we all become losers and how we have institutionalized that. How our “representatives” might be using too-broad of strokes in their sound bites and so not represent anything we truly feel anymore. How no one really knows what to do anymore and so conscious leadership is waning.?
• We need to talk about what is really going on in our spiritual development. About what "spirituality" means and about what it could mean. It’s time to take the taboo off having feelings about more than the tangible five senses of awareness. About how our inner life is evolving, so rich, so profound, so open, so psychedelic (often, if you are lucky enough to have access, literally). There are so many ways into spiritual meaningfulness, so many expressions of spiritual truth and beauty, so many smells and bells and a thousand books about any number of paths we might take. These books are right here, right now, at our fingertips. In specific, I’d personally like to talk about how spirituality has become a smorgasbord for our minds, our bodies, and our understanding of things and people and ways and energy and so much more. Also, though, how the journey, whatever the specific path, is so astoundingly the same for any human.?

So yes, we need to talk.?

Maybe even touch while we are talking. Or gesture wildly. Or smile broadly. Do you remember when people did that? When getting excited was a joy, not a signal toward irrationality??

The bottom line for me is this: Before we can begin to attempt to be conscious leaders “out there,” we must become conscious “in here,” which means we must talk (ideally, without hierarchy, roles, and measuring sticks) because no one becomes conscious in a vacuum.

With good talk, we can possibly decondition ourselves from the contrived cultural narrative and find ourselves thinking more originally. We can stretch ourselves so that when we look out at the horizon we have the capacity to actually see something new. We do not have to see everything new (another misguided notion that will only serve to overwhelm) but something new, anything new. Yes, we do have to practice seeing that. And seeing in that way.?

We need to talk to each other because we need each other.?

I will say again that it will take effort, and risk, and a daring gesture of hope (see me smiling and waving my arms wildly), but we can.

I'm Robin Rice,?an author, teacher, and senior advisor?in conscious leadership working at the intersection of our professional lives, personal relationships, and social impact. I invite you to connect with me here on?LinkedIn?(follow me for posts that support your deeper journey or request a connection) or email me through my website at?RobinRice.com. You will also find my most popular online course, Training Your Inner Warrior, at BeWhoYouAre.com.