Are we nearly there yet?

“Are we nearly there yet?”

Just five words but what a lot of emotions they evoke! As every parent knows, children have no sense of time passing. Whether on a 3 hour car journey, or over the 24 days of Advent, it appears that if you’re under 7 then time just seems to stand still. Waiting is painful.

As adults we have found ways to get around having to wait: we buy now / pay later; we click and collect; and we pay to jump the queue. The underlying message is that waiting is something to be avoided. But what if the endpoint of our waiting is unknown and the way to it is unmarked? When this is the case, time spent waiting is not fixed obstacle to be overcome. Rather each moment has purpose because how we spend our waiting time will determine where we end up.

I have been learning about this over the last few months as I have been going through a career transition. Here’s what I have learnt so far:

Good things happen when we wait: Far from being boring, in my experience waiting is an emotional rollercoaster. There is the visceral excitement of the unknown and the hopeful expectation that the next encounter will unlock the future. And then there’s the frustration when that doesn’t happen... and the fear that it never will. But these emotions are good, because with every high and low my hopes and aspirations are refined. Priorities shift. ‘Must haves’ are challenged and preconceived ideas are dashed, replaced by a deeper understanding of what is important, both to myself and to society at large. And this is good.

Waiting well is as art not a science: Every day is spent in active pursuit of the next opportunity. It requires determination, creativity and an open mind to unexpected avenues. I am learning that there is no secret formula and certainly no shortcuts. The key is simply to keep on going. Since I began this journey the world of social impact has opened up in front of me. I am dazzled by the range of amazing people and organisations dedicated to making the world a better place. I continue to refine my personal positioning with each new revelation and I am indebted to the kindness of people sharing insights and ideas to help me along the way. Over the last few months I have met a whole host of fascinating people, and reconnected with many friends and colleagues who are on a similar journey. The route is certainly not linear… but every jink and curve adds richness and colour to the story and will make the arrival, whatever that looks like, all the more sweet.

Waiting needs boundaries (and boundaries need stretching): My family are very patient with me. We agreed that I would pursue this dream until November. We are now deep into December and I’m still on the trail. Some point soon I will need to bail out - at least on a  temporary basis - to make sure we can pay the bills. I appreciate that it is important to be honest with ourselves and know when we are beaten, unlike Monty Python’s doomed and completely deluded Knight Who Says Ni! ("tis but a flesh wound!"). But I also believe that we shouldn’t give up on a dream too easily. As lots of wise people have said, “if it was easy then everyone would be doing it”. So I am stretching the boundaries of what is comfortable. Stepping into genuine risk territory. And the task is to remain calm and get creative at this point… rather than freezing up, getting desperate and retreating.

So as I am discovering, there’s a lot to be said for waiting. And as Advent reminds us- the treasure is rarely found where we expect it; often looks radically different to what we thought; and far surpasses our wildest hopes. Here’s to that! Merry Christmas to you.