We have to talk…

I am honoured to be a member of the?Chartered Management Institute’s (CMI) President’s Advisory Council for the 75th?anniversary year of the Institute. The theme is leadership, focusing on how it is critical for leaders to behave inclusively.

I was invited to the CMI awards dinner which took place this week at the Victoria and Albert Museum in South Kensington. I have been very impressed by CMI and its ethos since I first got involved, so I really wanted to go and celebrate with those who had received awards for their leadership and management. Doors opened at 6:45 and the event was due to finish at 11 pm.

As a wheelchair user who uses personal support, though, this presented several challenges for me. I live about 50 miles outside London and always travel in and out by train. As we have not yet reached that paradise state where wheelchair users can get off and on trains independently, I have to book support and turn up at the station 10 to 15 minutes in advance. Leaping onto the train at the last minute or freely alighting at my destination is not an option! The later in the evening the journey, the riskier it becomes that staff will not be on hand to get me off, so I need to build in quite a bit of contingency to journeys if I’m going to keep my anxiety levels under control.

In addition, since my accident about a year ago, I need two people to put me to bed. If I want to deviate from my normal practice of bed at a regular (and relatively early) time in the evening, it takes a certain amount of coordination and may require a change of personnel to accommodate the late hour.

As I saw it, I had three options. 1) Taking the train but leaving the event early, so I had a better chance of being taken off at my home station and not ending up in Stockport or Stoke-on-Trent. 2) Finding a hotel overnight somewhere between South Ken and Euston with two or three suitably configured rooms (not an easy task) and arranging for a second PA to come and join me and my work PA overnight. 3) Driving into London in a disgustingly diesel polluting adapted car (suitable wheelchair accessible hybrid or electric vehicles are hard to get), with the consequent need for a car parking space, and increasing the level of stress to my PA. In order to decide which option to take, I needed a lot more information.

My accident reinforced a growing realization that I am not superwoman, and that life is easier if I acknowledge that and behave accordingly. So I have become better at asking for what I need. Despite this, I still carry the limitations of thinking, bred from years of discrimination, that lead me not to want to be a burden, or to put anybody out, or to identify myself as ‘difficult’. It will take a lot of practice and probably the rest of my life to eradicate that!

I contacted CMI and asked if I could speak to someone about the schedule and logistics of the evening. I did not anticipate how amazing CMI would be in helping me to work out how best to organise and meet my needs so that I could enjoy the evening along with everyone else. From offering to let me in a little early so I could warm up and use the facilities (always a problem as this can take up to 30 minutes depending how cold I am), to ensuring that my meal would be cut into bite-size pieces so that I didn’t have to nudge my next door neighbour to cut it for me, to organising a car to take me home so I didn’t have to leave the festivities halfway through, they could not have done more.?

In consequence, I thoroughly enjoyed the evening. I could put any anxiety about my well-being out of my mind and just be. Yet it wasn’t all courtesy of the questions I was asking. Yes, I kicked off the dialogue, but then?Jo?from CMI kept asking me: Is there anything else we can help with? What about…? That really helped me to think through every aspect of the evening. What a great example of inclusion in practice – thanks CMI!

I encourage anyone who has specific needs, whatever they might be, to start a dialogue. But I wouldn’t have felt able to do that if I hadn’t already known from my previous encounters with CMI personnel that my approach would be welcome. So I also urge organisations to be open and reassure everyone that they can ask if they need more information, some kind of adjustment, or a different way of working.?

We have to talk. If we don’t, true inclusion will be beyond our grasp.