If we are dying, what wishes will we make?
In 2017, our grandfather passed away in front of my eyes. It was when I was in 11th grade. He died of cancer. I remember spending some time with him when he was hospitalized. On the morning weekends, I visited him, buying him some breakfast and talking with him. I stayed there till the afternoon and came back home. When thinking about our grandfather, I wish I had asked him this question.
What have you regretted the most in your life?
These days, I re-read the book Resisting Happiness, which I finished months ago, because the book gives me many questions about life that I cannot find all the answers to yet. The author Matthew Kelly told that once he performed his projects at hospitals, he asked nurses and doctors that
What wishes do patients often say before passing away?
And here are their wishes:
I am sure that our grandfather had things he regretted and wished he had done in his life.
You know what, every one of us has 24 hours in a day. When a new day comes, it always reminds us of another chance and tells us to do what we want so that we can live a more fulfilling life; but most of the time we refuse to listen.
Now, take a moment to imagine this:
You are dying and lying on a bed. How the world will change?
Think about your loved ones and who love you, first. I'm sure all of them will be sad and mourn in grief since now they are losing you and your presence matters to them. They will come to you and be with you in every last moment of your life. And now, you wish you had spent more time with them when you're healthy.
How about your company and social networks? They will be sorry for you as well. But they will forget you soon. Your company will immediately recruit someone to take your position over. People in your network will keep building new relationships with others who can benefit them in the same way you do. Now, you wish you had not prioritized work and titles.
Finally, look at yourself. You are conscious that you are lying on the bed. Death is coming. You are scared. You are not ready to leave this world. You regret things you did not do when you had time and health. You ask yourself why you did not search for the meaning of life earlier and do good things for others in need much more. You whisper to yourself, 'I wish, I had...'.
Some of us are dragged into following social norms and misunderstand success and happiness.
Some of us know how to live meaningfully but resist getting out of our comfort zones and kicking it off.
In my life, from the moment I moved from a peaceful small village to Ho Chi Minh City, one of the biggest cities in Vietnam, I met and even lived with some people, either around my age or older than me, enjoying their lives in inactivity. They are the ones who choose a life with 'save less and spend more', 'give less and receive less', 'less happy and sadder', 'love less and hate more', and 'listen less and talk more'.
领英推荐
They immerse themselves in fleeting happiness and laugh at those who are working on themselves to move forward with a meaningful life.
And I wondered, what are they living for? Do they realize the missions of their lives?
You and I, we don't stay in this world forever. We earn money but we cannot take it with us. We meet famous and successful people and build connections with them on purpose, but we cannot take them with us. We try to stand out in a crowd but we cannot take fame with us. But there is one thing we can take with us and make people remember us when we die.
It
is
LOVE
Love yourself so that you can be yourself, be proud of your own limitations, and do not worry about what other people think about you.
Love challenges so that you can spend time doing what you want, chase your dreams, take on challenges, and live the meaningful life that God gives you.
Love your family and best friends, who always encourage you and do not judge you when you fail, so that you can spend more time talking with them and trying to understand them more.
Love ones who are struggling with poverty, hunger, loneliness, depression, and stress so that you can sit down with them, listen to them, and help them.
Keynotes: Life is short. We do not know when we will say goodbye to this world.
Actions: Ask yourselves, 'What prevents me from doing things I will not regret if one day I lie on a bed?'. Then, make a plan and do it immediately.
I cannot teach you how to live. Your life is yours. But I can listen to your story and have a deeper conversation with you about it if you give me a chance to do it.
Feel free to message 'Hi' to me whenever you need someone.
Thank you for enjoying reading!
As always, I wish you a happy Monday!
Nhi Tran