We Don't Learn From Experience... We Learn From...

“We don’t learn from experience… we learn from reflecting on experience.” This quote from education philosopher John Dewy has stuck with me ever since I heard a colleague of mine share it a few weeks ago. As an executive coach, I find this quote to be quite significant because it strikes at a key component of what makes coaching work for so many people.?

Experience vs Reflecting on Experience

According to Dewey, experience is a naturally-occurring phenomena. Experience happens, whether you’re paying attention or not.?

However, reflecting on experience is deliberate and intentional. Reflecting on experience is a conscious choice that involves thoughtfully considering and analyzing past events to gain insights and understanding. It’s a process where you can assess your emotions, thoughts, actions, outcome, and context.

Experience happens naturally. Reflecting on experience is deliberate and intentional.?

What are the benefits?

There are a whole host of benefits that come from reflecting on experience. Here are a few common recurring themes that I see with my executive coaching clients and self-awareness course participants:

1?? Learn from your successes so that you can amplify your strengths. You have many strengths, some of which are a unique combination to you.? Are you aware of all of your strengths? What could you gain if you leaned into them more? Reflecting on experience can support you in honing in on your strengths and leaning into them more often.?

2?? Learn from your mistakes. Mistakes happen; they're part of life. The same mistakes will keep happening if I keep doing things the same way. Reflecting on your mistakes gives you a better chance of not making the same mistakes over and over again.?

3?? Make better decisions next time. Through repeatedly reflecting on how you make decisions, you begin to shift how you make future decisions.?

How do I do it?

Be curious and ask open-ended questions. Here are a few questions that I often use with my coaching clients to support them with reflecting on their experiences:

?? What am I learning about myself?

?? What am I learning about my situation?

?? What will I do differently next time?

What format should I use to reflect on my experiences?

You are likely already very familiar with all three of these formats, as you probably engage with them every day.? The key to this experience is being intentional and deliberate.

?? Think? - Thinking is probably the most common way each of us reflect on experience, but just to be clear, it’s different from letting your mind run wild or ruminating on a thought. This works well if the experience is one that you’re able to process yourself, and perhaps isn’t too complex. Be intentional with the questions you ask yourself.?

?? Write - This format works great when the experience is a little more complex, you’re having a challenging time organizing your thoughts, or find yourself bumping up against a barrier and not progressing. Writing is a forcing function for organizing thoughts.?

??? Talk - Find someone to talk to about this and process through conversation. If it’s a friend or colleague, you might ask them not to give advice, but instead ask a few open-ended questions. If you’re looking for professional support with reflecting on experiences, trained coaches are often a great resource, depending on your needs and their area of expertise.?

What now?

Pause and take a moment to intentionally reflect.?

You might choose to ask yourself, "What did I learn from reading this post?"

Think, write, or talk about it!

- Alex Wallash

Thank you for reading! If you have questions, comments, or liked what you read, subscribe, tag me in a comment, or send me a message.?

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