We don't do feedback or accountability very well.

It is a fact that in our western, American culture, we don't give feedback very well, and we talk a good game about holding people accountable, but we just don't feel comfortable with either skill.

I led 5 group coaching sessions this past month with the design to follow up from last month's training session. They were to come prepared to talk about the specific action they publicly agreed to during that training. In the first coaching session, I can predict how many will actual do what they say: Between 30-60% at best. Then, I do another training, another coaching session and guess what? That percentage goes to 70-90% the next time around and from then on out. It seems that they just need to understand that "Rodney's not gonna let this go!". I do it in a way that is not intended to shame someone, but rather, get them to own the fact that they - not me - agreed to do something that was important at the time and they - not me - didn't do it. Usually, the excuse is, "I didn't have time." Imagine that, a leader in a company with lots of activity. "I'm curious, was this a priority or not?", I'll ask. You see, many in our culture will continue to behave that way, then the leader does not call it out, so there is no "skin in the game". What happens in these cohort sessions is interesting. They begin to call each other out. They began to make less excuses. They begin to reinforce behaviors that lead to accountability. What did I do as the coach? I provided a process, a consistent process, known as a Cadence of Accountability.

I wish I'd have coined that term, but we must give credit to The 4 Disciplines of Execution?by McChesney, Covey and Huling, one of the most impactful books in my library that I have all coaching clients at a director and above read.

Related to accountability is feedback. In our sessions I ask the leaders to get some feedback from their direct reports between sessions. They often come back with, "Well I asked, they said 'hey good job boss and keep it up', but other than that, I did not get much." That is common, because of three things: 1) The power dynamic; you are the boss, so you are the one who must make it safe, 2) the competence; most have never been taught to give feedback, and 3) the cadence; if you don't ask for it regularly so people trust your intentions, don't expect it. Feedback is a skill that I have to teach and reteach. I'm a pretty good facilitator and trainer and usually people can recall the key steps, but our culture keeps pushing back on application of feedback. In order to give feedback, you as the leader must be willing and able to receive it, and people have to trust your intentions. Will you kill the messenger when they give feedback, or will you say "thank you" and follow through? In giving feedback, there is art and science too it; too much to cover here, but two things: clearly describe the behavior you are observing and state the impact of that behavior (positive or negative). If you learn to do that, you are well on your way.

The good news? These are skills that with specific actions will improve your influence significantly and immediate. Find out how and give us a call. 858.414.2660 caleb-consulting.com