We can never forget our real friends

?We could never forget some old friends as they meant something to me at that time. Even if I meant nothing to them and they could forget me, I don't think I could forget someone who I used to care about. I remember a lot of things like birthdays, days we met, what they wore and what I wore, and things we did together. My memory is rather quite amazing because I can recall a full memory like it was yesterday. When a friends birthday come up, I remember them and think of them on that day. Memories of us hanging out and having fun replay over in my mind. In the past, they were once my happiness and my best friends.

Today they are nothing but a stranger living their own life with no contact and I'm okay with that. There's either a reason for them not being my friend or simply we just grew apart. My heart will and could never forget those who I cared for and called a friend. That's just how my heart is regardless if they remember me. Although first getting to know her was amazing. From discovering different, weird (in a good way) sides to her personality, to late night conversations... everything just fell into place, and I realised just how much I could understand her... how much I could connect with her. It felt like I had known her forever so quickly.

Before I knew it, we were talking every free second we could. Before I knew it, I found myself already opening up to her about things I had never told anyone else(my coming out story). Before I knew it, she meant the greatest friend of all time to me. Before I knew it, she was my best friend. I always thought we didn’t need much in life. Food, water, a roof over your head, blah blah blah. But is that all we really need? What about having someone understands the maze that is your mind? Someone who makes you laugh until your body aches? Someone who you can show your true, unfiltered self to without fear? Someone who you could talk about nothing with for hours on end? Someone who brings out the best in you and changes your life just by simply being present in it?

I was indeed loving the way she excitedly (or not so excitedly) used to come and tell me as soon as something good or bad has happened. I never knew I needed that, until she showed me what it's like to have that, and now I couldn't imagine life without it. Everything was just *perfect* until there were some issues and misunderstandings started to show up between us, which untied our bonding. Then a biggest turn of our friendship came, when she stopped showing up in WhatsApp chats and accepted no phone calls. She removed me from her to-do list, that’s her choice.Well, no one owes me their time or interaction. I respect that.

This often happens with people that normally best friends title moves to being just friends and would merely move from friend to mere acquaintances. You meet people every day and you never know who you’re going to become friends with until that friendship develops over time. The more time you spend with that person and the more things you do with them, the more you get close. I got close but she didn't do so, was the saddest part "she didn't" I guess not as much as I did. Separation was difficult, actually difficult as hell as expected.

Only because I was the more gullible one in the friendship who was not able to get over this deceitful behaviour. I don't know what went wrong with me. The way I'd wake up to find if she was still online, "I couldn't sleep for nights -Her being online still not replying was hurting me as hell. -Her meeting every people in the world (her friends),but still making excuses to meet me was hurting me from within. -Me finding her phone calls being busy most of the time I tried calling. This in turn hitting this thing in my mind as if she has replaced me with someone new without feeling hurt the way I was feeling.

-Fear of being ignored again stopped me to make friends again. -Apart from work I cud barely do anything as I was hurt from within. I was incapacitated but tried everything to not show others and her that I was hurt. Time was running by and hard on me. That time was my ""first time I was feeling that kind of tough situation"-phase. Finally rather than accepting or denying my emotions,I tried to fight back. A lesson to be noted- "Your "friend" is still controlling you as long as you let them create any emotion in you" I learnt it from a book. "Bhai emotions ne sara kaam kharab kia, I don't blame her mere is haal ke liye". Then a phase of "slowly drifting to normal shifting" started. I got better each day thereafter. Finally I am over it now if you ask me how?? Please don't ask me as I am back to normal now. Cheers!