We all have our own money "script"

When I was 13 part of my homework from my parents before video games was to read the newspaper. One Saturday the Toronto Star happened to feature in their “Life” section a deeper dive on the perils of credit card debt for students. They profiled a handful of students who racked up 5 figure credit card debt in undergrad. For a kid who hadn’t even really had a part time job yet at that point – those numbers seemed astronomical and I couldn’t even really fathom having that amount of money let alone owing it. The article talked about the stress these students felt, the guilt and shame of coming clean to their parents and wondering how they would get out of it and so on.

Now fast forward to the summer before I head off to university after high-school. The bank called to offer me a student visa credit card. They gave me some of the usual lines (emergency access etc) to explain why it would be potentially important. I had a flash back to that article and instantly shot them down saying I wasn’t interested.

My dad?asked me what the bank had called about and I told him they offered me a credit card and I said no because of all this bad stuff I knew about credit cards. My father took the time to explain to me that yes if you don’t pay your credit card off on time then it’s a bad idea. However – if you use it properly and pay it off – then it’s not a bad thing to have.

Humbled by that conversation with my dad – I later went into the bank and asked to get my first credit card before heading off to university. That was one of my first real memories about money and it’s still one of my most vivid. The fear/anxiety of imagining being in those other kids’ shoes owing thousands of dollars to be honest is still kind of haunting in a way.

My internal view on debt & credit cards – all started with a chance article from the Toronto Star at the age of 13. I was now on the path to being afraid of all things debt at that point and my dad could have continued to push me down that path. He could have said “NEVER use credit cards. NEVER go into debt.” He could have told me stories of other people who had debt problems that made things hard.

But he didn’t.

He reset my view on credit cards back to a healthy middle of the road. He helped me create a sound framework with which to view credit cards. To be honest – I don’t know if I ever told him this story, but I am eternally thankful to him for that one small conversation.

?We all have an internal dialogue about money. We have a view on what it is, how it should be used, what’s good and bad about it, and so on. What we may not be aware of is how much those dialogues (aka “Money Scripts”) are based on factors that are unique to us specifically. What we hear, who our role models are, our own personal experiences (ex. Job loss, family struggles, etc).

It’s worth taking some time and really thinking about money. Think about what it means to you. Think about what you WANT it to mean. If your money script doesn’t line up with the rest of your values – it’s worth diving into that and understanding why.

#personalfinance #money #moneyscript #financialplanning #bigpicture #debt #creditcards