We are all fractured and broken...

Did your neighbour’s life feel perfect this Sunday evening when you were surfing through Instagram?Did that call or message from a close friend after many years make you smile and give you a sense of comfort?

Do you realise that we are all fractured, chipped at the corners? Have you ever thought that we are all broken and insecure in our own ways?

The person driving that luxury car next to you may also be driving away some demons in his own head as he turns at the red light.

The lady carrying the expensive hand bag could also be struggling with some nasty expectations from herself and maybe her family members. 

How often do we notice all this? We don’t. 

We are all taken in by what is visible, the materialistic manifestations of success or the smile we all put on as a facade, for survival in this world. That is how perceptions and impressions are formed. Comparisons with neighbours, relatives and peer pressure of what others have achieved is taking a toll on all of us.

For the students I teach, I may seem perfect while in my head I could be fighting insecurities and pressures.

For me, the senior I once reported to, maybe doing great without realising the pressures she is facing to prove herself. The personal and professional challenges that form a part of everyone’s life are mostly invisible to most people.

The stress which accompanies the big designations and promotions are known to all yet conveniently ignored by all when it comes to others.

Success is relative and so is life.

Recently, while talking to a senior person in the Learning and Development space, we spoke about how big firms sometimes hire people from great pedigree but are also careful about hiring people who are a little insecure - just that little bit insecure and with the biggest professional priority being to prove themselves. This ensures these people are willing to work round the clock, put in the extra hours and say yes to most things which come their way in the attempt to better others around them and prove themselves. In most cases, these people are trying to prove themselves to themselves.

These are the same people, who their neighbours and relatives believe are sorted in their heads. Big designations, good money, happy family - smiling social media photos add to the glamour of the perfect lives.

We believe that the neighbour who lives alone is better off than us for he has something which we don’t have, without realising that the very same neighbour is looking at us with yearning for the perfect life we seem to have in their eyes.

We reach out to people for advice believing they have answers to our personal and professional predicament without realising that the same person could have walked out of another meeting with someone else taking advice for their life.

Each one is us is trying to find a purpose in life, live a dream, set new goals and conquer our fears everyday. Each one of us is dealing with some challenge and living out of our comfort zone at every moment of our lives. We are all affected by the opinions of others and are continuously seeking comfort in the company of that close circle of friends where we can let our hair down.

Yet, as humans we are unforgiving to the people around us for living this so called ‘perfect’ life. We are unforgiving for their failings and slip-ups without realising that these people are human like us and can do with some forgiveness, some space and some love.

If only, we would sit back and accept that everyone is a little chipped, everyone is broken, everyone is a little insecure and scared in their own way. If only we could accept that everyone has a fracture somewhere - we would make our own life easy and also the lives of people around us.