WARNING: THIS IS NOT AN OFFICIAL SCRABBLE WORD

REY is not a word in the Scrabble dictionary.  I knew it wasn’t a word when I played it but I did not think my son in law would be brave enough to challenge me. He has been married to my daughter for 5 1/2 years and fathered our granddaughter, but I was still surprised by his boldness. We are a trash-talking scrabble playing family and for the last 5+ years, he sat there like a mouse and just took the abuse. Now he was the one "feeling it" and was challenging my word choice and talking trash.

He challenged and I lost. 

So what happened next? I did not take it personally when he challenged me. I did not focus my attention on hating him for marrying my only daughter! Whoops, I meant to say, I did not focus my attention on his challenge. I moved on to the next opportunity I would have to spell a word.

There were no more letters left. I was behind by 7 points. When it was my turn to play, I used the exact same letters that I tried to use when I lost my last turn in a different order on a different place on the board.

If my son in law had not challenged my word REY, then I would not have been able to play the RYE with the Y played on a double letter spot which also spelled YE and RE in the other directions (for the scrabble aficionados) for 20 points which made me the winner AGAIN against my therapist son in law, my lawyer nephew, and my otherwise brilliant but scrabble challenged wife.

So, what is the lesson? When something potentially negative happens like my scrabble word being challenged and losing the challenge - do not take it personally and stay fully present. I had no idea how the game was going to turn out but, if I threw a pity party or got angry, there is no chance that I would have come up with the 20 point word.

This scrabble lesson can also be applied to life. When something does not go our way, we can look for the lessons that can be learned from the situation and see what we may be being protected from now or prepared for later. I really believe that life is meant to be lived in the present and we can’t be fully present if we are stuck in the past focused on things that cannot be changed and angry about things that may or may not happen in the future. Do not take anything personally and look for opportunities – they are literally everywhere. Valuable life lessons can even be learned from playing scrabble. I really, really, really, like to win but it was not about winning and losing (sort of ??) - it was about me showing up as the best version of myself and giving myself every possible chance to win.

Wes Becton is the Co-founder and CEO of George Washington Street Partners which is a leading executive leadership, career, and performance coaching and consulting company. Wes Becton provides leadership and diversity coaching to C-level executives and boards. Wes has extensive executive leadership and governance experience in a wide range of industries including banking, education, and healthcare. Wes is the former Board Chair of Northeastern Illinois University and currently serves on the Boards of Elmhurst University and Pan American Bank. Wes is a former Infantry Officer and graduate of the Army’s Ranger School. Wes earned degrees from George Washington University (BA International Affairs) and Lewis University (MBA Health Care Administration). Wes is a certified professional coach (CPC) and also a member of the International Coach Federation and he is a frequent speaker and lecturer on leadership topics.