Want Out From the Grind? Here’s How to Create a Career You F*Cking Love

I spoke with Amelia Noel, a consultant turned investment banker turned life and career coach, on how you can break free from the grind and create a life you f*cking love. With some self-awareness and a mindset shift, you’ll change your entire relationship with your job, and finally start living on your own terms.

Signs you need to pay attention to

From her clients in finance and consulting, Amelia notes some problems she usually sees. Do you experience these?

Perfectionism

This can be crippling and lead to an endless cycle of analysis paralysis. But what is “perfect”? You’ll realize you don’t even know because it doesn’t exist. Before going into a project, accept that feedback is inevitable. You’ll notice the burden lifted from your shoulders.

Imposter Syndrome

You feel like you don’t belong. You get good feedback but you don’t even believe it. Overcome this by logging your wins each week in an Excel sheet. Aim for 10 wins per week. This gives your brain a chance to quiet that internal chatter and convince yourself that you are good enough.

Having no control of your schedule

With deadlines and meetings left and right, it’s like there’s no space for you anymore. Amelia advises finding blocks on the day where you have more control and take small steps to find space – even just a 5-minute break. Be more intentional and set a calendar reminder at least thrice a day to breathe.

Difficult to shut off or delegate work

It sometimes seems like it’s the end of the world when you decline a meeting invite – well, it’s not. Out of all the calls you’re invited to, one could probably just have been an email. So try to decline that one least important meeting each week to make better use of your time. No one will hate you.

Figure out what to do next

Once you notice the signs of burnout described above, it’s time to decide where you want to be — your immediate next and long-term next. It can be difficult to map out your destination, so use your current job as your compass. Do you want to move forward in the job or the industry you’re in? Or do you want to move to more unfamiliar terrain? Make a list of 30 things you hate about your current job and 30 things you like. You’ll find that you actually know what you want. Be clear on what those are.

Whatever you decide, you’re bound to feel some uncertainty. Amelia advises countering this by making two decisions: (1) Deciding to leave your current state and start something new, (2) Deciding that the first decision is the right one for you. These are two different things.

Expect self-sabotage

Once you’re clear on what you want, it’s your brain’s natural response to scare you. It chooses familiarity over passion, Amelia notes. If you keep listening to your brain, you’ll never take the leap and you’ll be “safe” – but stuck.

You feel fear because you think there’s something to be feared. Our emotions are shaped by our thoughts, so try to hack your mind instead by listing what you’re afraid of. By putting it out on paper, you also form emotional distance. Ask yourself: How might these fears not be true? Chances are that some things in your fear list (although not all) can be crossed off by deliberately shifting your mindset.?

Another thing that holds you back is feeling like you have to know the how before you make the move. You’ll actually just end up complicating and overanalyzing things. The willingness to take action and figure out the how as you go is simply all that you need.

SYCK tricks for your next steps

Whatever your goal is, the first steps you take are pivotal in accelerating your career. And it has a lot to do with building your network. Amelia shared her top tips:

1. It only starts with one connection. Focus on learning about this person, ask good questions, and end with the question: “Is there anyone else I should talk to?” From there, it will snowball into many more connections.This comes in handy especially if you’re new to the industry you’re looking to pivot to.
2. Seek out a mentor. They help you learn about what to expect in the job search or promotion process. You can find them in Employee Resource Groups (ERGs), school clubs, or company programs. You’ll be surprised at how many people are willing to help.?
3. Prepare for networking chats or interviews ahead of time. Your connections are a wealth of information, so ask good questions. Do your research and prepare cheat sheets for these conversations where you take note of trends or recent deals that the company has made. Good preparation shows respect and knowledge.?
4. Be your own hype man. Before meetings, ground yourself and approach them from a place of curiosity rather than obligation. Tell yourself you’re going to learn something new.
5. Create a chat log. List who you’ve talked to. Always write thank you notes to show your connections and your appreciation in taking the time to help you. For a more heartfelt touch, sprinkle in some personal details you remember from your chat.
6. Keep connections warm. After your initial talk, don’t just forget them. Keep the connection going by actively reacting, commenting, or chatting on LinkedIn.
7. Don’t fear cold outreach. Don’t worry, you have a chance. Angle your communication by viewing them as an expert, making them feel respected, and by expressing your excitement in seeking advice. A lot of people won’t hesitate to talk about themselves. Also, keep it short, light and fun.

SYCK Podcast

Amelia No?l on Instagram

Amelia No?l on LinkedIn

Amelia No?l Website

Amelia No?l on Facebook