Vulnerability & Leadership
The Power of Vulnerability
For many years some have been misguided in the believe that as an effective Leader of people you MUST be invinsable and impervious to failure - or in other words: Invulnerable. Being vulnerable has long been considered to be a weakness, but is it? Are leaders required to know it all, have all the answers, free of mistakes and singlehandedly come up with all the solutions? We all know this is a completely illogical and an absurd notion at best however most everyone reading this knows someone that has this perception or a variation of it. At the very essence of their strategy is a fierce belief that showing even the slightest hint of vulnerability would cause their teams to see them as “weak.” They couldn’t be more mistaken. In reality, vulnerability is a strength. Every leader has vulnerability. The greatest leaders have a great sense of self-awareness to recognize this fact. They also recognize that showing their vulnerability is a sign of courage and strength.
I recently watched a talk with Brene Brown, a renowned researcher who studies this subject matter and in fact deconstructed the meaning of vulnerability. In essence she connected this word to Leadership showing it, as perhaps the most important strength one should cultivate. She points out that vulnerability is not a weakness at all. It is, perhaps, one of our most accurate measures of courage.
As leaders we must be courageous and allow ourselves to be seen for who we are. It is important to have the courage to be imperfect and show our authenticity. She states that the only reason why people choose to be invulnerable is their fear and shame to be "seen". According to Brown, vulnerability is the combination of uncertainty, risk, and emotional exposure. Vulnerability is a natural condition of the responsibility leaders take on—it isn’t a choice but a consequence. To declare oneself “not vulnerable” would be inauthentic and would leave a leader living in a perpetual state of denial and stress. So it’s better and more courageous for every leader to acknowledge as well as embrace the fact that vulnerability is there.
Howard Shultz, CEO of Starbucks, once said, “The hardest thing about being a leader is demonstrating or showing vulnerability… When the leader demonstrates vulnerability and sensibility and brings people together, the team wins.”
What does Vulnerability look like in the workplace?
Being vulnerable in the workspace doesn’t mean you walk around with a box of tissues and share your deepest, most personal secrets with everyone. So what does being vulnerable in the work environment look like? Being vulnerable at work simply means you are ready to let your guard down, put aside any pretenses, and be your real self. A vulnerable leader is one who checks his or her ego at the door, is comfortable with not having all the answers, and is ready to wholeheartedly embrace the perspectives, opinions, and thoughts of his or her people.
A leader who shows vulnerability is someone who stops feeling compelled to be the first one with an idea or the first one to answer a question. Becoming vulnerable requires a mindset shift where you start to see the aspirations of the business through the eyes of the people you lead - vulnerable leaders are exceptional at discovering the authentic perspective of the people they lead and continuously see the business through the eyes of the people they serve. This invites your team to become more involved in – and in fact to become the drivers of – the conversation. When you are vulnerable, your employees feel more connected, invested, respected, and vital to the organization.
Being Real and Authentic (Vulnerable) as a leader is in direct correlation with how we are able to connect and build relationships of trust with our employees. People have great "BS" radars and can see right through most who are just trying to pretend and uphold a certain image. While we may try to appear perfect, strong or intelligent in order to be respected by others, pretense often has the opposite effect intended. Research by Paula Niedenthal shows that we resonate too deeply with one another to ignore inauthenticity. Just think of how uncomfortable you feel around someone you perceive as “taking on airs” or “putting on a show.” It is exactly this feeling of discomfort that creates distrust terminating the connection that is needed for success.
In short Vulnerability creates trust based relationships where employees are freely giving of themselves and participating in the process yielding positive and constructive behaviors - which in turn will lead to greater feelings of hope and trust in both the leader and the organization.
So what does all of this tell us? Basically the morale is that if we practice the art of being vulnerable the happiness, satisfaction and personal connection the employee derives from his or her work will foster greater loyalty than any amount on their paycheck!