Vol.9 Lasagna - Layers of Truth

Lasagna Please

What do you think of when you read the word lasagna? For me, it's not about the word itself, it’s all about emotion. Instantly, the thought triggers my sense of smell and taste, oh, yes please. In this moment, lasagna is my truth. Actually, is there really any other truth than lasagna?

As a foodie, writing this is literally making me hungry. As a Change Management leader, I can't think about lasagna without making the connection to how complex people really are (and that’s a wonderful thing).

Although I had this volume written in my head, today sparked a connection that brought me to put thoughts to keyboard. Have you ever experienced that moment when you hear something that directly connects to your reality? Well, it happened.

Today, during a live session of ‘Ask Me Anything’ with CEO Brian Duffy and other SoftwareOne executives, the importance and reinforcement of “having the real conversation” and "psychological safety" was on full display.

For full context, Brian was responding to live questions that pointed to core values, uncovering organizational challenges, validated that change is normal (and expected), and the power and focus on continuous improvement - together.

First of all, wow. An executive team that put themselves out there, walking a high-wire, and without a safety net. Executive sponsorship at the highest level. This meeting format has become a standard at SoftwareOne. The magic is that the sessions are genuine and not seeded with content. I’m proud to be part of an organization that lives the example of embracing change.

PRO-TIP: From a Change Management perspective, a live 'Ask Me Anything' session is a highly effective way to model organizational truth and transparency. Very highly recommended, 5/5 stars.

Demanding Truth

Truth does not come from making a demand. Truth is the result of consistent behaviors that take effort, focus, and attention. Building a culture where truth matters must be based on a foundation of compassion, empathy, and trust.

So, what does what does this have to do with lasagna? For some odd reason, the truth is typically compared to an onion (thanks Shrek).

People are not onions there is no single truth, the truth is not that simple. Truth is nuanced and personal. I really wish people would stop saying peeling the onion.

I'm currently working on a number of projects that require discovering the truth. Figuratively speaking, pressing someone against a wall and demanding the truth simply doesn't work. Oh sure, they will say something, but it's most likely what you want to hear. When leaders operate from a place of inauthenticity, the truth is elusive since people often feel trapped, saying anything to avoid discomfort.

Organizational Truth Layers

Every organization is made-up of layers, sales, accounting, operations, services, technology, etc., you get the point, layers. Multiple ingredients go into each layer. Each layer has its own characteristics and truth (and a lot of them).

How do you eat lasagna? Probably not a question you've ever thought about, but here you are anyway. I’d say that most of you use a fork or a knife and cut through all the layers, then take a bite of everything together. Am I right?

When customers consume your product or service, what are they eating? Oh sure, they see cheese on top, but their bite consists of every part, all layers. It's pretty cool to think about it that way.

Unfortunately, within many organizations, there’s an epic cheese battle to be unique and important, and an urgency to be viewed as that top layer.

Based on the customers that I've consulted with (and personal experience), leaders are responsible for their own layer and rarely cross to the next. That firm layer of flat yummy pasta becomes a firewall between the layers, every silo 'better' than the next, locked in protection mode, and sometimes in competition with each other.

Again, think about how the lasagna is eaten. Every consumer eats every layer together.

Even if only buying your simple widget or service, each transaction touches all of the layers – technology, operations, sales, marketing, all of them. I think the point is self-evident here.

My wish, and Change Management mission, is for companies to understand that all of the layers make the lasagna, and eating only one, is not very satisfying.

Need help with that? Feel free to ring the #SoftwareOne Change Management dinner bell. ?

The Human Layers

Change Management is deeply connected with that human truth layer. I have the amazing and incredible honor, and opportunity, to interact with people real people on a daily basis. I find that most people want to share their truths, people want to share their experience, and, by and large, most people are generally good at heart.

Being human is an incredible complex thing. Each of us is challenged to navigate the world on a daily basis (through our own set of truths).

Humans are all emotional beings, before logic. The absolute best plans and ideas in the world can be stopped in an instant by a simple emotional reaction. But am I good enough? Is this good enough? What if? This truth can be quite amazing, powerful, difficult to understand, and awesome.

I hear it all the time, “Why is change so hard?”, “I wish people would just do as their told”, “I pay them to tell me the truth and they should”, and my all-time favorite, I once had a CIO tell me, “If people don’t get it then I don’t want them working here anyway”. Wow, just wow.

Truth is deeply connected to emotion (all of the layers).

Layers of Ingredients

In Vol.8 Forest Lessons , I detailed behavioral examples of human resistance. Now let's dive into some specific examples of what truth looks like including the real barriers of why discovering truth is so difficult.

My ask of you, please do your best check your personal bias at the door while reading this next section. Think of only one thing, lasagna, let your mind objectively consume the content.

Have you ever found yourself frustrated when doing that 'requirements gathering thing'? How about simply asking for feedback? How about trying to gather information about a process to look for new ways of doing things? Ever struggled with any of that? Welcome to the club.

Let’s look at some of behavioral signs and barriers that contribute to the trouble discovering the actual truth and barriers to having "real conversations".

Human Behaviors:

• Fear of conflict: Humans may avoid engaging in challenging conversations due to a fear of conflict, potential backlash, or damaging relationships. You might get part of the truth, only part though. Symptom: May look like short answers in messaging or email, only responding to parts of a message, blaming others, passive resistance, avoidance.
• Confirmation bias: People tend to seek information that confirms their existing beliefs, disregarding alternative perspectives or conflicting evidence. Oh, this one’s really good on both sides, the subject and the person asking the questions.?Are you (or they) really open to hearing the truth if you know that you’re the one that’s right about the topic? Or that your opinion is the only one that REALLY matters? Danger, danger. Symptom: May look like being argumentative or being inflexible.
• Ego and self-preservation: Personal pride and the desire to protect one's self-image (and reputation) can hinder honest conversations; humans may naturally prioritize their own interests over the truth. This is very VERY common. Symptom: May look like avoidance, half-truths, only light conversations, camera off during meetings, disengaged during live meetings.
• Groupthink: In group settings, humans may conform to the dominant opinion or avoid expressing dissenting views to maintain harmony and avoid confrontation. Symptom: May look like quiet meetings then suddenly everyone (or most) agree all at once. A perfect example of why forcing everyone, by name, to give open feedback during meetings is not productive.
• Silence and/or apathy: A lack of active engagement or reluctance to speak up can indicate a culture where open dialogue and truth-seeking are not encouraged or there’s a perception of “values on the wall” only as symbols, and the individual truth is not aligned. Symptom: This may look like poor or inconsistent follow-up, avoidance, absence and/or lack of effort.

Barriers to Real Conversations:

• Lack of psychological safety: This is another great one, and often misunderstood. When individuals fear negative consequences for expressing their thoughts or challenging the status quo, they hesitate to engage in genuine or deep conversations.
• Hierarchical structures: Organizational hierarchies (visible, hidden, and/or implied) can create power dynamics that discourage open communication, making it difficult for the truth to emerge from lower levels or for dissenting opinions to be heard.
• Time constraints and competing priorities: Busy schedules and pressing deadlines can limit the opportunity for in-depth conversations, leading to superficial discussions and a lack of deeper exploration.
• Unclear communication channels: Poorly defined or inefficient communication channels can hinder the flow of information, making it harder to address important topics openly and honestly.
• Lack of trust: A lack of trust among team members or between employees and leadership inhibits the willingness to share concerns or engage in authentic conversations.

It’s critically important to recognize these signs and barriers to create an environment where real conversations and the pursuit of truth are valued (lasagna layers).

Truth is not Automatic

By fostering psychological safety, encouraging diverse perspectives, and establishing effective communication channels, organizations can overcome these barriers and create a culture of openness and transparency, and yes, this takes intentional effort. No calling it in.?Leaders are needed to set the example.

Whether I'm engaged in coaching or consulting my advice is the same, in order to foster psychological safety and truth, you need to be comfortable in your own skin (scars and all), be the role model you wish you had. And maybe with a little bit of luck, with intentionality, and perseverance, you'll find your own truth, and then (and only then) will the path open to learn the truths of others.

I’ve seen this play out throughout my career, the discussion from leadership that, a person is difficult, that a team is uncooperative, that a group just doesn’t get it. Is that really about them or is that about the leader, the leadership team, and/or the culture? Psychological safety (and truth) does not magically appear simply because the words are spoken. This takes effort.

Organizational culture, having the 'real conversations’, and discovering truth doesn't have to be that complicated. Let’s make this part of your Change Management plan, together.

Enjoy your Lasagna.

I have many tips and coaching items to write about, but what fun would that be? I'd rather talk instead.

I love this topic, let's have a conversation.

~Kevin (aka "The Cloud Therapist")

Please submit topics and questions for future volumes (I'm listening)

A quick note to my readers - thank you for your feedback, support, and encouragement. I strive to bring you relevant thought-provoking content.?#grateful ?that you choose to spend your time with me.

I appreciate your commitment to reading these all the way through. I know they can be quite lengthy. My goal is to bring you unique perspectives and things to mentally chew on.

#SoftwareOne #ChangeManagement #RealConversations #OrganizationalCulture #PsychologicalSafety #EmbraceTruth