Visible Transformation

I have a large scar on my wrist that I have carried since I was 10. It is somewhat embarrassing. Not in the physical sense; through the years, it has gone from looking like a puffy pink worm to a flat translucent rock vein.

The embarrassment I'm talking about comes more from an emotional point of view. It is a reminder of where the manifestation of rage can lead. My sister had locked me out of our house, and I angrily punched my hand through a window as I was pounding on a door to gain entry.

If I had the capacity to learn the lesson in the moment or the day, I suppose God might have spared me the experience of carrying this badge of temper for years to come. With reflection, I admit I wouldn't have learned my lesson if the glass had simply shattered and I walked away unscathed. I needed years for my pride to allow my perspective to mature so I could comprehend the lesson.

This marked healing reminds me of an art form in Japanese culture called Kintsugi. Artisans repair broken pottery with lacquer?dusted or mixed with powdered?gold,?silver, or?platinum. This technique allows people to see that the vessel was broken at one time but now holds greater value due to the strength and beauty gained through the process used to highlight its imperfections.

Knowing there may come a time when we will feel broken, have we put enough work into ourselves to be resilient enough to embody the capacity to recover from the difficulties and shine moving forward? Some questions we might think about:

Are We Seeing the Whole Picture

When discussing practicing resiliency in 30 Worthy Guides for Mapping Your Best Life, I call attention to the fact that "writing things down is one of the quickest ways to hone an objective lens about situations. G.K. Chesterton noted, 'It isn't that they can't see the solution. It is that they can't see the problem.'"

In other words, have we done our due diligence in taking a step back to do a proper inventory around the entire perimeter of the situation—we can't always see all the cracks in need of repair from a fixed position. To form a restoration plan, we need a complete picture.

Are We Allowing Enough Time? ?

Sometimes, we get into a routine of operating with a "fix-it-fast" mentality—get it "out of sight," and it will be "out of mind." This processing method works great for 80% of everyday transactions—things that don't have second or third-order consequences from the decision being made.

However, sometimes, we must pause to avoid becoming too quick to slap on "a solution" that might not stick because we are missing a skill or resource needed to address the situation entirely. These cases might draw the necessity to triage to gain time—addressing immediate non-negotiable needs now while better equipping ourselves to address other urgent and non-urgent needs in a more planned fashion.

"Healing is an art. It takes time, it takes practice. It takes love. ~ Maza-Dohta ? ? ?

If you look around on your journey, you'll observe many beautiful people carrying a blemish or two. Admire them because you know they are survivors and have a story or two on resiliency. In a world of insecurities, their visible imperfections make them relatable—more authentic. And remember to give yourself grace along the way; a flaw in time has the potential to be a fortune in the future.