Victim, Worker, Winner – Who Are You Being?
Nancy John, CTDP ACC
Leadership Coach to Introverted Leaders ? Leadership Facilitator ? Leadership Strategy Consultant ? Team Development ? Speaker ? Equipping Introverted Leaders to build Influence & Visibility
BE – DO – HAVE. That’s the Winner’s approach. It starts with BEING, with engaging the whole person – body, mind, and spirit. It creates the best possibility for long lasting change. “Who do I need to BE to have access to the kind of outcomes I want?”
Contrast that with the Victim who starts from a place of waiting to HAVE – waiting for things to change before moving forward; and the Worker, who initiates by DOING more and more, until becoming driven to the point of busyness and fatigue.
WHO ARE YOU BEING?
Many of us get stuck between the Worker and the Winner – the BEING vs. DOING. That’s understandable. A person’s actions speak a lot to who they are. That said, it’s not all they are. Think about yourself as an example. You are not just your physical body – you are also mind and spirit. With BE – DO – HAVE, you start with and engage your full self.
WHAT’S THE ACTION?
1) On a piece of paper create three columns – BE, DO, HAVE. Start with HAVE (your goal/outcome). Then move to DO – what would you need to do to have what you want? Lastly, move to the BE column and ask, “Who would I need to be (qualities, character) to be able to do these things and have these outcomes?” (John Nieuwenburg, Key Concepts – Be Do Have)
<See example below as a starter.>
2) Focus on the BE column. Ask yourself:
- Being a Confident, Caring, and Committed person what do I believe about Myself?
- Being a Confident, Caring, and Committed person what do I believe about People?
- Being a Confident, Caring, and Committed person what do I believe about Time?
- Being a Confident, Caring, and Committed person what do I believe about Money?
- Being a Confident, Caring, and Committed person what do I believe about Success and Failure?
3) How is this (can this) BEING show up right now? Act on this.
When you start with BEING, you’ll notice that you are inclined to take the actions in the DO column, not because you must, but because they stem from who you are. Then the HAVE becomes the natural outcome. And even if you don’t get exactly what you want to HAVE, if you walk away being a confident, caring, and committed person, wouldn’t that be the true win?
What are your thoughts on the BE – DO – HAVE approach? Share in the comments below.
Know someone who puts this in practice? Tag them in the comments and have them share.
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5 年Nancy, love the simplicity, flow and structure to the BE-DO-HAVE approach. ? It has been my experience that focusing on how I want to BE provides the focus on how to create the change I seek and on what I then need to DO to realize the desired outcome.
Talent Strategist | Program Leader | Change Architect
5 年Nancy John CTDP ACC, I like your approach.
Emotional Support-Coach
5 年Nancy it all makes great sense to me! The way you explained it was very helpful. I’ll just need to fill in my columns and share with you. You can tell me what you think. Thanks Nancy!
Leadership Coach to Introverted Leaders ? Leadership Facilitator ? Leadership Strategy Consultant ? Team Development ? Speaker ? Equipping Introverted Leaders to build Influence & Visibility
5 年If you’re wondering how to apply BE-DO-HAVE in your life, feel free to DM me.