Veterans — Best Transition Advice You Received?

I recently asked my online network of veterans, military spouses, and veteran advocates to share the best piece of advice they received when transitioning from the military to civilian world. The experience of taking off the uniform is often met with anxiety, uncertainty, confusion, and opportunities. Navigating that transition requires focus, insight, and resources. Sometimes the best insight comes from fellow veterans, as seen below.

It is my hope that this information helps you see that your concerns, fears, and challenges are not unique — others feel the same way! And, I hope you see that there is good advice out there… you just need to ask and listen. The comments I received are shared here intact, except where spelling errors detracted from the content, or where the messages were overly promotional or sales-focused.

Here is what you said was the best transition advice you received:

1. Networking 101: Always ask if you can network and what you can do to assist the person. Job Search: Look for roles that fit you – IT Project Manager is not a good fit if you only know how to use Office Products and plug in a modem.
2. You have a ton have things on your resume that non-military people can relate to.
3. Get over yourself! Rank means nothing to civilians.
4. “Stay linear” Most technical rates have a really good civilian counterpart/industry. Most vets spend 4-6 years on a single enlistment learning a trade/craft. Ditching it all together to do something completely different puts vets at a disadvantage. Stay linear as you transition, get a job linear with what you were doing and slowly make a transition to something else, but the sudden and rapid changes that pull you in a different direction not just hits you in the pocket but more so in the watch – you only have so much time. oh… and if you stay linear, you have a nice resume that shows good consistency.
5. Get to know yourself! Your unique skills, talents, experiences in terms of IMPACT. Talk in the language of IMPACT and unique value – the language of employers. Then network, network, network.
6. Several friends advised me that it was OK to take a break for a while before rushing into a new job. As one friend put it “You’ve worked for the same employer for over 20 years. How often do you see that in the civilian world?” It’s ok to take a few months for yourself to really figure out who you are without a uniform on and what YOU really want to do without someone else directing you. Response offered: I agree But I tried this… guess what, though … money never sleeps and life takes no breaks. A week into my resting period I had a family emergency unexpected and cost be $3K and then some after expensing everything.
7. Get the opinions of those who have actually done it… not those within your own unit/ group. Have money saved (6 months) to live on. Have a job. Have a plan (a real, detailed plan of action of what you want.)
8. Don’t believe the myth that hiring managers are going to line up to hire you because they love Vets because we are punctual, mission focused, good team workers, etc. You have to demonstrate true value to the hiring managers, the ability to solve the problem that the hiring manager is facing.
9. Create a LinkedIn account!
10. Also “what you say matters. Does who you are talking to understand what you are saying?”
11. Have a healthy system in place to help you process the ’emotions’ of leaving the military. If you find that you don’t have one or find yourself struggling with your emotions get help, DO NOT suffer in silence.
12. Maintain contacts and build relationships with the people in your networks. Someone internal making a recommendation for you, gets you further than a resume on a hiring manager's desk.
13. No jargon and quantify everything.
14. Network, network, network…….also, get on LinkedIn!!
15. Find a mentor in your chosen profession. Network on LinkedIn!!! Once you’ve become proficient in your career become a mentor to others.
16. Tailor your CV according to the job you seek. Avoid military acronym usage. Smile, and be naturally enthusiastic during the interview process.
17. Read Lida Citro?n’s book, “Your Next Mission”!!
18. Be proud of your service but never assume you’re entitled to special treatment or privileges. Also, be as loyal to your co-workers as you were to your brothers and sisters in arms.
19. Never forget where you came from and those that elevated you to new heights through their coaching, mentorship, and tolerance of the mistakes you made along the way as you grew.
20. Having stood by my career USMC husband of 20 yrs.: His networking with already transitioned and employed former marines was key. Having a professional revise his 6-page resume to civilian format and language. Emotional therapy. Decompression time. Acceptance that it would take a few years and jobs to settle.
21. Find a Vet mentor in your field. Someone who can help you avoid their mistakes as you move into the private sector.
22. Maybe not the ‘best’ but certainly the most valuable: “The same people in the office and in the Navy like your salty sea stories – no one”
23. It’s going to be a rollercoaster of emotions, your ego will get hurt, you will be confused at times. But through it all remember all you’ve done in the military and all obstacles you overcame…stay positive and remain steadfast and confident, you got this!
24. Learn about personal branding!
25. Pay off all your debt before you transition.
26. Those who are in the Know, know.
27. “‘Learn to speak civilian’ get out of the habit of speaking in anagrams and other military jargon. The sooner you get used to that the easier it’ll be once you’re out.”
28. Smile and be yourself.
29. “You will leave here never being the same person again. You will be a better and stronger person.”
30. Pieces of advice that I received: First, when networking find out what the other person is doing. When I became more concerned about the other person instead of worrying about myself, getting to know others became so much easier. 10 of the 11 jobs I’ve had since leaving active duty (1993) came via network contacts (source: A Chamber of Commerce mixer). Second, know yourself! Sounds simple but it took me years to figure out my true passion. Could have saved a lot of time if I sat down and really figured out what would “float my boat,” before flinging resumes all over the place (source: What Color is Your Parachute; still the best career book out there), Third, know your industry and become an expert (source: Atlanta area job club). Finally, listen to your transition team. My best transition team member was my wife. To this day, she still finds errors in my resume, and I teach resumes as part of my current job (source: my wife of course!!) Best of luck with your article and continued thanks for all you are doing for our vets.
31. Although I am not transitioning any time soon, the best advice I received from a friend who at the time of his retirement stated this directly to me, “We are not here to stay. At some point, we will have to get out. Whether medically, involuntarily or fortunate enough through retirement.” Those words resonate with me and often time I echo his sentiments to those that are preparing to make the choice to leave the military. Best reality check I’ve ever received. With that said, I’m still preparing for my second career after the military. My dream is to become a city manager. After all, I’m not here to stay. (9 years left)
32. Remember you have gone and done things which civilians will never grasp. No one can take that from you, but it is ultimately of value only to yourself. Honor that as best you can, quietly in word and deed. Learn quickly that there are two worlds, and you are going back to the other one, and it is completely different, and you will need to find your place in it.
33. Prepare mentally to start back in the trenches and work your way back up into leadership positions.
34. Transfer your Post 911 GI Bill to your children before you get off active duty.
35. Remember, even though you still have a squad, team, platoon, company of people to watch over…. now it is your family, kids, spouse, etc. …. but remember, they are not soldiers, but your family. You cannot drop your 4-year-old to do push-ups!!!
36. Every position allows for leadership; it just may not be in title or compensation. ?? This is where veterans can really shine, we have the natural ability to take charge and lead others, no matter the tasking or what our “job title” says.
37. I had a conversation with a buddy, we both got into volunteering after we got out of the Navy. That helped out a good deal.
38. Keep a copy of EVERYTHING for my personal records, file with the VA immediately, and Network with people everywhere, vigorously.
39. Know that your rank does not carry over into the civilian world. But, don’t undervalue yourself. Don’t just focus on what your “billet” was or job title was. Collateral duties count too. I was able to get a job in the civilian world based on what I did for collateral duties.
40. “Just because you’ve been through a fire fight or two doesn’t mean that you are ready for college, They are two different games: you were trained for combat, you weren’t trained for school. Stay humble, keep an open mind, and take advantage of every opportunity.”
41. I think a very powerful thing was recently said by a disabled vet and advocate, and I cannot remember his name. He basically said that things like PTSD should not define veterans. We should not let ourselves be defined in ways that are not accurate or retain our strengths to ourselves and society. We all built a strength, and we have to be able to claim that strength in regular life. So very often we have to try and evolve it or suppress it, and that creates a lot of problems. Hence so much work trying to figure out on both ends how to merge those two worlds. It may not be possible in a societal unless we become like the Spartans, so again, I am thankful for my chief’s words. The best to you as well. We will be fine! We already are.
42. Start thinking about and preparing for your post-military career many years prior to when you will leave the military, ideally 8 years or more prior to leaving the military, and ideally prior to joining the military. Why so early? Because it can take a military member 8 years or more to earn a Bachelor’s degree while serving on Active Duty, and earning a goal relevant Bachelor’s degree from a solid school with a good reputation and a thriving alumni network is a great step towards achieving your post military career goals.
43. Plan early. I started planning almost 2 years before leaving. It almost was not enough time. If you can pick a degree up while in, even better. Ideally you should have 4 plans. 1 as your primary target industry/company, 2 backups, and 1 in the event you have to change from your desired field to an alternate. It may sound tedious, but it works.
44. Let the world see you who are. Volunteer or intern with a meaningful organization. Don’t rely on the traditional methods to get hired. We’re different for a reason – don’t spend hours applying for jobs online. You’ll wear yourself out. If you’re not 100% sure what you want to do- then volunteer or intern until you do. The worst thing you can do is come from a meaningful life of service and end up in a rigid low paying desk job. Honor yourself and allow the right job to come to you.
45. “Stay humble, stay true to yourself and what YOU want to do, and remember you have two things that can never be taught- heart and passion”
46. You can’t think of this as a promotion or even necessarily a lateral move.
47. Don’t sell your rank, sell your impact and skills. Additionally, while your military service highly influences who you are, you are no longer in the military. Listen, learn, adjust and drive on.
48. SMART Transcript, Now called joint services transcript.
49. Pace yourself, don’t panic and follow your instincts. Your path will cross with the person or business you meant to align with.
50. Get a job.
51. Don’t transition before it’s time. Remember everyday of your last year is an interview or opportunity to demonstrate your worth. Far too often I see good folk power down much too early. In doing so people quickly forget your first 20 plus years of service because their view is clouded by the absenteeism you displayed while “preparing” to transition. Work hard and do your best until the end. Maintain those bridges front and rear.
52. Utilize ALL of your resources. Continue to search out new resources. I’ve been out a little over two years, and I’m amazed at how many resources (and networks) I continue to find. Use your benefits. I’m so glad I tapped into my Post-9/11 GI Bill to pay for my MBA. Always ask questions. Worst answer you’ll get is “no”. Ask the VA and other organizations if they can help. Just like in the military, keep at it until you get the answer you’re looking for.
53. It’s not what you know, or where you have been; it’s who you know, so network…
54. Life is an adventure live it.
55. Quit thinking about your new job as the most important thing to transition. Not that income isn’t important; it’s more that the rest of your life will depend on how you move past your service.
56. Consider your family’s expectations of you before every decision you make; before you apply, before you interview and before you accept the offer. What is expected of you as a dad/mom, spouse/partner is more important than signing up to the expectation of your new employer.
57. I made the decision to retire as early as possible. I wanted to have the best opportunity to have a second career as it is difficult to permanently retire from the military. I highly recommend that you pay attention and take notes in your transition courses with your respective Services. Your disability, education and retirement pay benefits are at the pentacle of the list. Keep in mind that retirement benefits are different with respect to the VA from state to state. Truly consider where you are retiring and research where you will get the best benefits for the efforts of your service. Save some leave and transition time to allow enough time for interviewing and job seeking if you aren’t afforded enough time prior to transition. Consider hiring a professional resume writer to help get you started as sometimes our abilities, skills, training and experience is really difficult to communicate to corporate America. Education is key – if you don’t have a bachelor’s degree, it will be much more difficult as many organizations reserve leadership and management positions for personnel with a degree. Use available resources like people on Linked In who have already successfully transitioned.
58. Be sure you have a concrete long term plan. Lots of military members get out of service to just go to school but have no plan for their future. I would recommend setting up interviews before leaving service. It can offer you an insight to what is on the other side because most know the grass isn’t always greener on the other side!!!!
59. “Transition isn’t new. It’s just new to you. Get out there and meet people who have ‘been there, done it, and have the T-shirt!'” It sounded real corny at the time, but it was spot on. The more I talked to people (networked), the easier it was for me to piece together the puzzle called transition.
60. ‘You will be back.’ It was a challenge to ensure a degree and a new future. I didn’t go back.
61. I had to do what I had to do before the job I wanted came to fruition. If you’re in that boat, bloom where you’re planted. Do the best you can and don’t burn any bridges once you leave for something “better,” however you define it.
62. For us enlisted folk: A former Army warrant officer who was working in the civilian field I wanted to transition to told me very few civilians know, or care about the differences between officers and enlisted. If you have the right education/experience, you have your shot.
63. Ask for help!! 9 times out of 10, you don’t got this on your own. Ask for another set of eyes on your resume, interview prep, networking.
64. Transitioning Service Members must be prepared to answer the question, “What do you want to do?” While this may seem like a obvious, simple question that should be easily answered, the enculturation of Service Members to be humble professionals and selfless teammates makes it extremely difficult for them to articulate what specific position they want and why they are the most qualified professional for that role.
65. The best piece of advice was to truly find my passion. What do you love to do? Once you find your passion, look for people who are doing it and develop a relationship with them – ask them to mentor you. Also, think big and surround yourself with people who make you better.
66. Make a job out of finding a job!
67. “You are always on.” Every encounter is an opportunity to meet someone you can help in one way or another. Every encounter, especially in a work environment, is an opportunity to show others that you are a nice person; that you do what you say you will do; that you get the job done and do it using the resources available, in an innovative way, in a way the exceeds expectations. Every encounter is an opportunity to do something memorable; to expand your diverse network. To meet someone who does not think like you. To expand one’s worldview. Being kind to others is very important. The junior service member you treated with respect and trusted to get things done, is now a recruiter, a hiring manager, and in a position to introduce you to someone who can connect you to someone searching for someone with your background and experience. They still remember how you treated them. They want to help you. They will help you.
68. If you haven’t earned a military retirement, consider continuing your career in the reserves. The connections you will make and the additional skills you will learn can be a great asset to your post active duty career. My CO gave me this valuable advice 30 years ago!
69. “Recognize you are starting over.” It is hard to let go of what you have learned as ‘the next logical step’ in your career. Recreate yourself! Figure out the things you absolutely can’t do without and find somewhere to get to work that has them. No organization, even DoD, will make you feel like you did when active duty. Finding a new culture you are happy in and with is the goal. Once found, you will advance quickly using the knowledge and skills you have learned in the military as they become more comfortable with you, and vice versa
70. Start a year out. Interview for multiple interests. Ask for feedback. Identify your top three needs in your new employment.
71. Start early and take advantage of the help available to you. Hire Heroes USA is absolutely the best resource I have come across.
72. Kind of hard to rank… but if I had to talk to my former self, I would tell her Day 1: don’t forget that one day you will be a civilian again.
73. Don’t expect civilians to understand.
74. Be prepared for rejections. Not all HR/employers will understand what you did and how important your position was. So you will be passed over. Understand what your target industry is and only look at those positions rather than apply at everything you can do. Otherwise employers wonder that you don’t know what you want and pass you over. Overcome application tracking systems to make it pass the first filter.
75. The best advice I received was to get educated BEFORE leaving the military. Walking away with my leadership experience as well as a degree opened all the doors I could have ever wanted open. Becoming educated while in the military also exposed me to the civilian professionals I needed to network with and learn from.
76. It’s a dog-eat-dog world, be prepared to fight for your position and never let anybody hold you back from being successful.
77. Interview on your last year out.
78. Your experience in the Marine Corps doesn’t exactly translate in the civilian world, but if you go to college, it becomes a near perfect combination.
79. Perseverance and patience is key.
80. Know your benefits! Apply for all of them.
81. The #1 Lesson: Networking pays off more than anything else, and it isn’t a credential or a degree or even a reflection of your experience. The “who you know” rules in this world. This isn’t a bad thing if you take the time to cultivate relationships along the way and carry yourself in a positive manner. #2 – Jobs aren’t nearly as hard to find if you are willing to start at the bottom. At the same time, don’t be afraid to aim high.
82. Develop your resume to fit the specific job you are applying for and the modify to each job for which you apply. 2. don’t get over verbose on your resume…the reviewer may be looking for that 1 person out of 100 applicants — try to make yours stand out. 3. don’t be afraid to “toot your horn” about your outstanding accomplishments; just stay away from military jargon (unless you are applying for a position working with the military). 4. The interview: dress to impress, but something you are comfortable in. 5. practice your interview, preferably with someone who has experienced hiring employees.
83. Punctuality, discipline and organization can only go so far. There also has to be knowledge and value in what you bring to the table.
84. I didn’t leave the military, but leaving the Bureau was similar. The best advice I ever got was to conduct informational interviews with everyone who could provide me assistance. The beauty is the process helped give me clarity and focus my efforts as well as helping me learn the language of private sector. I recommend it to everyone!
85. Through MOAA reading a lot – network, network, network and network some more. Then met Harvey Mackay and read his books and learned networking was again to succeed and help others who will reciprocate. Finally learned the concept of purposeful networking to just refine the process, being a lifelong learner.
86. Understand how to use maximize previous experiences, and Leadership skills to market my value to future companies searching for talented young leaders!
87. Your military skills will transition to all job and opportunities, even those that may seem quite different. Write down all your experiences, data, work you have done over time and keep a master folder if you will ever need it in the future.
88. Discipline and attention to detail.
89. Don’t be afraid to fail a few times in your new career search.
90. I am somewhat bewildered. Lida asked for advice given prior to separating, I wonder how accurate many of these answers are, what rank you may have separated at, from what job and how much things may have changed in the last 20 years. I separated an E-4 from Bragg in an Airborne Infantry unit. I had inquired about taking college courses got told no way not in your position because you are in the field all the time, infantry units do not support their lower enlisted taking courses. You will always be behind and lastly we will not allow you to start what you can’t finish. Online courses weren’t yet an option. The in-service recruiter wouldn’t lift a finger to place me into a job that would better help transition to the outside world. Once my unit leadership heard I would be leaving I was belittled, told how worthless I would be on the outside, I would be back in a few months, absolutely no words of encouragement or advice what so ever. So, I was in a position to ensure none of those things ever happened and that I would do whatever I had to, to make it, doing whatever needed to be done to be successful. So maybe the worst admonishment was the best advice. I just wonder how many still may go through or still have to put up with thisResponse offered: I was E-5 promotable, if that helps. What you experienced in the infantry we all did, just not as magnified. Each part of the military applies various psychologies to different degrees. As Napoleon put it, “it is important to make small tasks difficult so large tasks will not seem so”. So, you indeed missed some personal educational growth being infantry and doing all you did, but you should now look for what growth you did get, and you got some good fundamental stuff if you turn the coin over. Remember the Warrior Spirit – the desire to overcome all obstacles in order to accomplish the objective. This translates very well to the civilian world. What you missed is not permanently missed. At 52 I just went back and like a lunatic. I finished an MBA. Use your benefits to chart a course and just go. Don’t look back at what was or was not. It’s your personal thing, and you must own it and squeeze it for all the good you can, and be proud of it. Yes, a lot of responses are “professional”. Good responses, but not applicable to you, or maybe even I. The advice you got, poor as it was, might teach you by what it is not. My Dad was good for that, and I thanked him for teaching me what not to be. That’s just as important if not more important.
91. Response offered: I will say this. Working with veterans in transition I will say that I have worked with many veterans who have a similar story. I recently worked with a veteran who was told that he wouldn’t rate comp and pen because he didn’t deploy. He was out for 4 years, and the nature of his injuries were as such that this piece of advice cost this veteran close to $40,000 due to comp and pen he will never get. So maybe the positive contributors on this post were just lucky.
92. The advice I was given when I went through TAPS in ’02 was: Check with your local unemployment office to see about work or resume prep.
93. If you are talking more than the person interviewing you…you are failing.
94. Find something and specialize in it. Whether it is networking, communications, sales… Find something that energizes you and become the best in that field.
95. What I found was that most people had great advice but very little opportunities. Reading between the lines I found the right connection is the person who has opportunities available, or influence over those opportunities. That is who you should be talking to. Everyone else has advice, similar to what you have learned over the years. If you want a change, look to those that have experience you don’t, in the field you are interested.Response offered: I feel the same way. A lot of people tell other people what they think they should do other than connecting to a live person that hires. Most of the time it’s good intentions, however, all answers cannot be the same for each person. We all are unique and have skills and interests that may not fit a ‘shell’ of a response.
96. Veterans are quick learners and adapt quickly to new jobs and situations. A military resume is very impressive, believe it or not. Dress for the job/position next up the ladder, or the job/position you want, not for your current job/position
97. Always pay yourself first. This means, even if it is a small amount, every paycheck, put money away. You work hard, so pay yourself first.Response offered: I love this comment!!! And because it is so simple, oftentimes it is overlooked… but this is definitely advice that they should instill in someone early as possible… what I also learned in my search for employment post-Navy is that the “rainy day fund… was needed and not enough”

Thank you to those who participated and share their advice! And, thank you for serving our great Nation as heroes!