Values: The Courage to Lead and Live By Example

There are a lot of so-called leaders out there making decisions for everyone, claiming it’s because of their personal values.

In many cases, those values are little more than lip service. A closer look at the people who claim that they are operating based on values often shows actions and activity that is opposed to what they are saying.

Worse, many people conflate values with religious belief and, in so doing, try to impose their beliefs, even on people who don’t share them.

There’s a world of difference between having values and talking about them. Let’s take a closer look.

Talk Really Is Cheap

Behind every political scandal, we’ve ever seen is a politician who says one thing and does another. Whether it’s an affair, shady business dealings or something else, there’s a whole lot of less than moral activity among our highest leadership and at most levels below that.

Many of these people choose to say what they think people wants to hear about morals and values but don’t want to adopt anything that might have an impact on their lives. They really do want to have their cake and eat it too.

The simple fact is that while that might fool some of the people, they are supposed to be leading, it will never fool everyone. There’s no quicker way to lose credibility than to be exposed as a liar.

Power Should Never Be An Excuse to Be a Bad Person

In many cases, people in high office and positions of leadership believe that their power will shield them from consequences. They believe that they can do things that are diametrically at odds with their stated views – and even break laws – and get away with it.

However, while it might be harder to take action against people with power, eventually, the balance will tip. When that happens, the consequences may be even direr after years of using stated values to cover a lack of actual ethics and morality.

Leaders Should Believe Something

People who want to be leaders – or politicians for that matter – simply because it’s a lucrative career choice rarely ever excel in the role.

The best leaders don’t start their careers because they want money, fame, or power. They get involved because they believe in something, and they’re willing to stand up, do the hard things, inspire people, and be a force for good.

If you don’t have your own personal inner moral compass driving your choices and decisions, you’re very likely to become the worst kind of leader – the one who only takes on the role so they can line their own pockets and take advantage of the financial and other perks of the role.

You Really Can’t Fake It.

Leaders who say one thing and do another when it comes to values, ethics and morals will always be exposed at some point.

That’s because when you don’t really believe in something, eventually, even the most carefully crafted fa?ade will slip, and people will see behind the mask. It’s impossible to be as committed to an idea you don’t really believe in, and it will show.

You Don’t Have to Follow the Crowd

We’ve seen an alarming rise in populist leadership. People who are willing to say things they don’t really believe simply to get people to follow them. It’s a growing problem and getting rid of it is going to be one of the biggest fights we will all collectively face in our lifetimes.

But what those people don’t realize is that they don’t have to say what people want to hear to be a leader. You don’t have to lie about your values to win friends and gain influence.

It takes far more courage to speak the truth, to use your actual values as your guide, and to gather a group of people around you who share your vision for the world.

It’s Okay to Change Your Mind

The difference between good leaders and bad ones often lies in the ability to recognize that your thoughts and feelings on anything might not be correct and to change your mind.

It takes a lot of courage to recognize that you might be wrong and to take the time to do honest research to discover what the truth actually is.

It’s okay to admit you were wrong. It’s okay to change your stance on issues, whether they are large or small. In fact, it’s one of the hallmarks of a truly courageous leader.

Leadership should always be a learning process, and as we learn, we usually discover that things we believed were true are not. Good leaders won’t keep that information to themselves. They will use it to change their policies and share the correct information with the people they lead.

It’s A Whole Lot Easier to Stick to Your Story

Have you ever heard someone tell you that if you want to lie effectively, you need to keep it simple?

That’s because it’s incredibly hard to keep all the lies straight when you start to weave a web of lies and half-truths. Not only is getting caught in a lie a serious mistake, but it can also damage your credibility – sometimes irreparably.

When your values match your lifestyle and your actions, there’s nothing you need to lie about. You’re not saying one thing and doing another, so you don’t have to make up any stories to protect a lie.

We Need Honesty More Than Ever

It’s very scary to think about not only talking about your values as a leader but living them every day. But that’s exactly what the world needs right now.

There are far too many people who put on values like a mask when they are in public and then become the exact opposite when they are not. We can’t keep living in a world where so-called leaders are allowed to say one thing and do another.

People See What You Do

The biggest reason why leaders lose credibility isn’t usually a big scandal. Although those are usually the things, we see first.

Failure to live your values as a leader is usually much simpler and smaller scale.

If you are a leader that states that diversity matters to you, but your whole team is made of white males, people are going to see that you’re not really invested in inclusivity.

If your corporate values include honesty, but you’re often caught in a lie, your employees and customers are going to know you’re not being truthful about what matters to you.

Losing credibility and believability on key issues can lead to a complete breakdown of trust, and when people lose trust in leadership, it’s almost impossible to regain. You also can’t effectively lead anyone who doesn’t trust or respect you.

How Can You Be More Honest About Your Values?

It’s all very well to point out the duplicity among some leaders and to talk about living your values, but it can be very hard to figure out where to start. Fortunately, while it’s not always the easiest thing to do, it is pretty simple.

Know Yourself

It’s very hard to be driven and guided by your values when you don’t really know what they are. So, if you don’t already know what matters to you and what your personal non-negotiables are, spend some time thinking about what really matters to you.

If You Can’t Say Something Nice, Say Nothing

Yes, your mother was right. You don’t have to say anything about values that don’t mean anything to you. If you don’t value honesty and aren’t an honest person, don’t say you are, and so on.

It’s better to say nothing than to lie about your values because you will be tied to that lie for the rest of your life, and it’s going to make things very difficult for you.

Even if you are indifferent to a particular idea, don’t comment. As soon as you weigh in, either way, you will be expected to maintain that take for a long time to come. Getting distracted by things that don’t matter to you will only keep you from doing things that really matter to you.

Expect to Attract People Who Share Your Actual Values

No matter what you tell people, human beings are smart. We can all read unspoken signals, and no matter what you say about what you think, people will be able to tell what’s really going on.

This means that you’re most likely to attract people who share the values you don’t speak about. Whether that happens to be a good thing or a bad thing, the people who gravitate to you will most often be a reflection of your true self.

So, if you look around and don’t like the people you see, it might be time to look in the mirror because there’s a good chance you need to change yourself before you can change your tribe.

Dr. Terry Jackson is Executive Advisor, Thought Leader Marshall Goldsmith 100 Coach, Top 10 Global Mentor, and Change Leadership Architect. Dr. Jackson partners with Executives and Organizations to align Strategy, People and Processes to transform and sustain Peak Business Performance.