The value of asking more questions...

I recall someone recently asking my advice on a topic.

“What do you think I should do”, they enquired.

As someone who has a huge interest in the art of coaching, instead, I asked them a question.

Sure, I had an idea. A brilliant answer if I may say so. But instead, I asked…

“Before I tell you what I think, what do you think?

They looked in the air, put a finger to their chin and replied “hmmn”, a sign of deep thought.

Then a few seconds later, they offered their own discovery.

Inside my head, I immediately knew their idea was much better than mine”.

Then they turned to me and asked.

“So what do you think ?”.

I didn’t share my idea. Such was the value of theirs and its superiority to mine, I felt almost embarrassed.

“I think you should run with that”, I replied.

Leaders often rush to give solutions. We rush to fix people. We rush to save the day. And yes, our answers can often be valuable. But I encourage you to resist the temptation at first, if the opportunity is there.

I believe leaders should develop leaders, not followers. One way to help people become leaders, is to ask them questions. By asking questions - instead of immediately offering solutions - two things can happen. Firstly we empower the person which help develops them further and we just might just unearth a much better idea too - one which would probably never have been discovered if we hadn’t asked the question.

Nancy Kline in her wonderful book Time to Think says, so often we assume that the brain that contains the problem doesn’t contain the solution.

Why is that?

I encourage you to ask more questions. After all, if you only ever hear your own voice you will only ever know what you already know.