Using the Rule of Three to Craft a Powerful Personal Motto

Elizabeth Gilbert shows us the power of the rule of three in her breakaway memoir,?Eat Pray Love. The title succinctly captures the inner impact of her outer travels to Italy, India, and Bali while also being catchy, intriguing, and memorable.

The rule of three has long been effective in storytelling (Goldilocks and the Three Bears; Three Little Pigs; Three Musketeers) but also in slogans and catchphrases (Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness; Stop, Drop and Roll; blood, sweat, and tears). It is touted by many as an effective communication and marketing tool. For instance, it shows up in a MasterClass Writing article called “How to Use the Rule of Three in Writing,” and in Business Insider article called “Marketers Must Understand the Power of Three.”?There is even an article in?Forbes?about a quantum physicist who recommends it to simplify complex ideas.?

The Rule of Three

The power behind the Rule of Three relates to how our brains deal with patterns and how we remember things. Three is the smallest number that constitutes a set and our short-term memory can most easily remember three or four things.??Plus, when we employ the Rule of Three, we are encouraged to hunt for the best three examples to capture the essence of something.?

Bottom line: The Rule of Three synthesizes ideas and makes communication more effective and memorable.?

It turns out, it is also a remarkably effective tool for getting to know ourselves better. It's a soul-searching endeavor to find three words that encapsulate our highest goal, truest ease, and inherent strength. But one that is worthy of our effort. Discovering a meaningful three-word motto can aid in refocusing us when we feel lost, helping us return to creativty, productivity and inner peace.

I have experienced the power of the three-word motto firsthand. At the beginning of 2020, I hired a messaging guru (Monkey C. Media) to help me create a new website blending several of my identities. I had written a book under a pen name, worked in the corporate arena under a different name, and embarked on a spiritual journey under another name. I needed to settle on one name, but also come up with a tagline that captured who I was including all my different identities.

This was no easy task.?

I was encouraged to come up with three words that together got at the essence of who I was and what I wanted to share with the world. Although this was an exercise I was doing for an outward-facing website, it was a tremendous opportunity for personal growth. When I settled on my three-word motto or tagline, I discovered not only did it tell others in a nutshell what I was about, but it reminded me of my highest hopes and dreams and how to accomplish them. It helped me integrate my inward journey with my outward expression.

I have created a formula to help you devise your own bomber three-word motto.

Think: Aspiration , Inspiration, Perspiration

Harnessing the Rule of Three for Personal Growth

In searching for three words that would sum up what I wanted my motto to elicit, I considered my highest goals and values, what brought me delight and ease, and where I had already proven a willingness to work hard and process life’s challenges.

I sum these up as my aspiration, inspiration, and perspiration.

Aspiration

I asked myself,?What is my highest aspiration??What is called for to embody my highest aspiration?

I had to dig deep. I wanted to identify not my highest surface aspirations--like making more money, selling more books, and reaching more people--but my highest?spiritual?aspiration. I wanted to capture what my heart longed for. I knew that being an awareness practitioner for the last twenty-five years was related to my highest aspiration. I was a committed awareness practitioner because, more than anything, I aspired to embody unconditional love. Aspiring to embody unconditional love required much of me: I had to let go of righteous indignation, be kinder to others, and still befriend myself.

After some time, I came upon the word “Listen.” Immediately I felt a resonance. The word listen reminds me to practice being selfless and attentive. It reminds me to listen to and respect others, to be compassionate and kind. It also reminds me of the value of meditating daily, getting still enough to experience an undistracted mind, and being deeply in touch with my core self.

When I whisper “listen” to myself, I let go of striving and pay attention to what is happening now. I relax and notice sensory phenomenon, which takes me out of my head and brings me back to the present moment. I become more attentive to what someone else is saying instead of seeking to be understood. I practice watching my mind instead of getting caught up in its stories. I stop judging.

My aspiration: Listen.

Inspiration

I also asked myself,?What inspires me? What brings me naturally to a state of ease and delight?

When I got quiet and gently pondered this, I thought about how inspiration comes when I feel light-hearted and hopeful. It comes in tiny moments of delight: the quick in-breath upon sighting a blooming cactus in the desert, a playful interaction when there is no goal or agenda, or while reading an inspiring quote or phrase that drops my shoulders and brings a smile to my face.??I thought about how, for years, life seemed so serious. Often, I felt like I knew the right answer to something (it was so obvious!) but knowing that answer didn’t alleviate my or others’ suffering. I heard the saying “You can be right, or you can be happy,” and wondered about that.??Is that true? Can’t I be right and happy?

I began to pay attention to what did alleviate suffering. I noticed that adopting a playful attitude made all the difference! It wasn’t whether or not I was right that increased or decreased suffering. What mattered was how tightly I held on to the need to be right, such as when I had an underlying agenda. When I was happy and agenda-free, collaboration and agreement naturally followed.??By adopting a playful attitude, regardless of circumstances, I felt happier, at ease, and inspired. My word became “Play.”

The word “play” reminds me to be light-hearted and to participate naturally without an agenda. It reminds me to enjoy all that life brings: good, bad, and ugly. It also reminds me that unstructured time is as important as being disciplined and organized, for it keeps the creative wild messy spirit alive. Play means being willing and ready to say Yes! to life.

My inspiration: Play.

Perspiration

The final things I asked myself:?What are my natural strengths???What am I willing to work hard at? What helps me process challenges? What taps into my natural vitality??

I came up with the word “Write.” Writing fulfills a curious need to do inward soul-searching through journaling or free-writing and to offer outward expression through sharing written stories. I write to remember to pay attention, to both fully experience this moment and to capture the details later. I write not only to create something new but to transform and heal. Writing taps directly into my vitality center.?Writing also helps me process. I have dozens of journals where I have poured my heart during difficult times.??I also have scads of articles and a couple of books where I have used writing to reach others. Writing is something I love for myself and love sharing with others. Most important, it draws from a natural proclivity. I am almost always willing to write.?

My perspiration: Write.

When I put these three things together: Listen. Play. Write. I immediately feel a resonance. Yes! My heart sings. Together, they capture the Trifecta of my life. I know, too, if I focus too much on just one of them, my life feels out of whack. Each is an equally important element in being my best self and living my best life.

Knowing my motto has had practical implications too. For example, when I had to come up with a brief (under 6 words) bio for the home page of my website,??I harkened back to my three-word motto and came up with this:??I am an Awareness Practitioner (listen), a Playfulness Instigator (play), and a Writer (write).

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I have used my process as an example. I encourage you to engage on your own. You won’t regret it.??Sometimes, an easy-to-remember reminder is all we need to inspire ourselves to live up to our highest ideal and to be brave enough to share that with the world at large.

Oh, if you do come up with a three-word personal motto, I would LOVE to hear about it!