Use sticky notes to build a better relationship with your kids

Kids are not stortytellers... unless it's bedtime.

My kids are terrible storytellers. Just terrible.

When they come home from school, I usually get monosyllabic responses to my earnest questions about their day:

"How was school?" I ask. "Good" she says.

I probe deeper: "Did you have fun today?" "Yep" she adds.

I try to get more specific: "What did you learn today?" Sometimes I get "Lots of stuff" or even worse, "I don't remember". Two hours after the bell rings and her learning adventure is a complete mystery. No memory whatsoever (unless, of course, it is 2 minutes after bedtime and then they can't shut up about it. Sigh.)

I love watching my kids learn. And I REALLY want to be a part of that learning curve. So I'm always eager to hear about school and always bummed when they are light on the details.

So I created a new kind of game to involve me in their learning and get them excited about sharing ALL of the details with me each day. Here's how you do it:

Prep the game

You'll need a few supplies:

• A big poster board (like for science fairs)
• Sharpie
• Sticky notes
• A ruler

On the board - draw a bunch of squares (3 inch x 3 inch). They should be exactly the size of a sticky note. Label each square individually in the lower right of each empty square (Square 1, Square 2, Square 3 - you can usually fit about 54 of them). Then in each square - write something that will be fun for you to do together. Or give them a learning challenge that will be fun for them to accomplish on their own. Some of my favorites for my 1st grader:

Together activities:

• Go on a long fall walk with Dad
• Write a short story together
• Read a chapter book together

Good solo challenges:

• Build something in lego bigger than you
• Read a book about an amazing girl
• Read a story about a kid from another country
• Play Soduku

It should look like a big board full of fun challenges - kinda like this:

Make a secret (success) message

Next, cover the board with sticky notes covering each square. When you are done, it should look like one huge piece of paper. Label each sticky note with the same number as the square beneath it (Sticky Note 1, Sticky Note 2, Sticky Note 3 - all the way to 54). On each sticky note - write a piece of the message that will cover the entire board. My message is typically some kind of riddle or poem, saying "Congratulations! You finished the board!"

Take all of the sticky notes off the board again and but them in an envelope where the kids can't see (usually taped to the back of the board). You're ready to play!

Playing the game

Every time you and your child are in front of the board, you can ask "What challenge should we accept today?" Sometimes, it is a math challenge, sometimes a vocab challenge, sometimes just spending quiet time together listening to a story. You know it is working well with the grandparents come to visit and the kids run up to them screaming: "I really want to read with you Grandma... We can earn a new square together!")

Piece by piece - they earn squares and start to fill out the hidden message. Every time a task is done, you give them that part of the riddle or message and stick that note on the board.

When they are all done with all of the fun learning challenges, they should be able to read the board's hidden message! In this case - I had two hidden messages in fact. There was the poem we wrote saying "Congrats" and we used 2 different color sticky notes to make the letter "A!" for her name (Abby)

Winning game

Every time she gets a row or column done - we have a fun kind of ritual. Each row - she gets to plan a special playdate with me. Each column, she gets to pick what we're having for dinner that night. Sometimes - we take pictures of those events and stick them around the outside of the board to celebrate those little milestones.

The real winner though is me. I get to be actively involved in her learning these days. She is so excited to earn squares and engage me in her growth - that we talk much more about what she is learning, what she enjoys, and what she is challenged by. Each of the squares that says "read to a grandparent" really makes those family visits special. Granny and Pop-Pop have been very eager to help solve the puzzle and love being asked to read or play math games together.

We've been doing this for a few years now (they even made me a board for my birthday last year full of Dad learning opportunities). And this year, now in 3rd grade, the riddle to solve is much, much harder (including semaphore, morse code, and backwards letter writing that will require a mirror). Photos coming as soon as she completes it!

Using sticky notes to fuel growth at work

I'll admit - I love playing games. And I love using sticky notes - they are all over my office. I should have invested in 3M many years ago. My company alone probably keeps them profitable. And while I love using sticky notes with my family - you should see how I use them with my employees!

At Table XI, I created a game to encourage employee development and career growth using, you guessed it, sticky notes. It's a process called the Sticky Note game that has been instrumental in our talent strategy - helping us to grow the team of software developers, designers, and strategists that deliver results for our clients.

A lot of people ask about our company culture and employee engagement. So we regularly talk at conferences about how we've intentionally invested in our people over the years. Eventually - we wrote down this whole process for others to try out on their own.

Give it a shot at your office: https://www.stickynote.game/

If you have other ideas or creative suggestions for how to use sticky notes to fuel growth and encourage learning, come visit me at Table XI.

I would love to learn about new games we can try (either at home or at work)!

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Mark Rickmeier is the Chief Executive Officer at Table XI, a UX research, design, and software development company based in Chicago. Over the past 18 years, he has created more than 100 mobile apps, custom-built web applications, and intuitive user experiences for companies like Tyson Foods, Discover, AccuWeather, and the Field Museum. 

In 2014, he founded Ops-Conf (short for Operations Conference) to bring together a global community of software companies to share insights and swap ideas on how to effectively run a consulting organization.

In 2017, he founded the Walkshop- a professional coaching company that promotes employee and team development by crafting programs and immersive experiences out of the office and in nature.   The Walkshop reframes the way you think by resetting your environment. The unique approach gives you dedicated time to go off the grid with your peers, get on your feet and active, and tap into your innate creativity.