Urgent need for Counsellors and Psychotherapists who can work with Neurodivergent clients
Sally Nilsson
#Autistic #ADHD #Psychotherapist, #mentor, #coach #PublishedAuthor #PublicSpeaker #Advocate. Host - Neurodivergence & Mental Health Podcast #family
Article on how to support the growing number of people being diagnosed with neurodivergent conditions.
Diagnosis
I had been working with a charity called Autism Allstars and read Helen Wallace Ile’s book The Ringmaster’s Tale as she has four children with autism. I attended the Cork Autism Conference online and saw Temple Grandin. What an incredible women. Highly recommend her film and book. I also met Paul Isaacs and read his book, Through the Haze. Recently I attended the National Autistic Society Conference which gave me a raft of brilliant resources.
As I read, listened and watched everything I could get my hands on the finger turned to point at me. When I listened to the audiobook Divergent Mind by Jernara Nerenberg I cried for the first half hour as I realized that everything that was being said was me. I went private and the prognosis was that I did not meet the criteria for autism but there were many pointers for ADHD.
I am often hyper focused on my special interests and with the amount of research I had done I did not agree with the prognosis relating to the ASD part. The main reason for this is that the assessment needs a good deal of evidence from pre 12 years old. If a person is a late diagnoser like me we just do not have anyone to speak on our behalf and our own memories might be sketchy. Also each ND type is completely unique (like neurotypicals) and so many traits are missed.
This is a common issue for many neurodivergent people so I am finding out. Women especially are missed because of their incredible coping and masking skills. I am now being assessed by a well known and highly respected non-clinical Psychologist called Sarah Hendrickx and I recommend watching her You Tube video on autism in girls and women. I also have a counselor/coach who is autistic. I very much recommend newly diagnosed people get someone to hold their hand like a coach as they go through their early ND journey.
I also recommend Tania Walsh – Aspien Woman, 18 traits, which gives a great account of what to look out for https://taniaannmarshall.wordpress.com/2013/03/26/moving-towards-a-female-profile-the-unique-characteristics-abilities-and-talents-of-asperwomen-adult-women-with-asperger-syndrome/
@TonyAttwood is a lead in the field of autism in girls and women and his book The Complete Guide to Aspergers Syndrome is highly educational. This You Tube video is great too
On ADHD this You Tube video is very good and presented by another expert in the field, Thomas E Brown https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ouZrZa5pLXk
How I present and help for Therapists
Until I have both my official diagnoses I self-diagnose as autistic and ADHD. It should be understood by empathetic Therapists that self-diagnoses is acceptable. Waiting lists are getting longer every week for NHS diagnosis. I may be looking at a year for my official ADHD diagnosis. This is unacceptable as I could really do with the hugely beneficial meds now. Going private is very expensive and they have often have waiting lists too. There is stigma and anxiety around getting a diagnosis. Not everyone wants to go around shouting from the roof tops that they have autism or ADHD etc. It should be enough that a person knows they have it. You can be sure that we have all done masses of research on the subject.
At 55 it’s hard to see where my autism begins and ADHD ends as there are so many cross overs. Both can involve stimming, sensory issues, communication problems, burnout, physical health issues, mental health issues etc, etc.
I have learned from the different Facebook groups I have joined that CBT is good for ADHD on it’s own but not so good for autism. We shouldn’t be trying to change the way a neurodivergent is/thinks/behaves. It’s built in. We are wired differently. Humanistic and Person-centred talking therapy approaches work well. I’m a Human Givens Psychotherapist and the work I do with my clients is reaping great rewards for them and me. A Community of Neurodivergent Counsellors is growing who treat Neurodivergent clients. I specialize in girls from 14 up and women and you can see how I promote this on my website www.freshstart.me.uk where I have just added a new section. In time I will focus my website much more on my specialism.
The terms low and high functioning are understood but they are not really correct. My son is high functioning on many levels but at present I don’t think he could live independently or even feed himself properly. It’s not bad parenting, he just doesn’t think that way. A seemingly low functioning autist may have invented an incredible piece of software and be very able in other ways.
Here are a few traits that Therapists can look out for and I see many of them in myself:
May enjoy talking in great length about their subject of interest
May be stubborn and adopt a black and white thinking approach
Be very curious and want to know all the details
Fidget and have a number of body movements
Little or no eye contact
Miss or late for appointments
Have unusual concept of time
Not want to be therapised. Just to share or tell story
To be listened to and understood
May interrupt as otherwise they might forget the point they wanted to make
May be highly anxious
Catastrophic thinker
Hyper focused, great attention to detail
Great empathy, huge imagination in many
Speak in either monotone or childlike voice. Can speak loudly or quietly
May become a little too close in therapeutic relationship
Boundaries and clarity very important
Imposter syndrome common
Autistic burnout
Intestinal issues, autoimmune disease, anorexia, meltdowns, allergies
Late diagnosis leading to grief, loss, identity issues, anger, confusion
Chronic stress, shutdown, dissociation issues
Many other physical health issues common to autistic people
Over sensitive or under sensitive
Sleep disorders
Emotional deregulation
The biggest thing to remember is that Neurodivergent people ARE FANTASTIC AND HAVE SO MUCH TO OFFER SOCIETY. PLEASE SUPPORT US!
Patience is the key. Therapists need to think in a different way and have training on how to work with ND clients and their families. We are not there to diagnose but we are there to support and recommend resources. We need to ask our clients how they want to be referred by. It’s not for us to choose the correct term. NDs can be super politically correct or quite the opposite. I’m not very PC and swear like a sailor but I have great attention to detail, see patterns in behavior and I will be on the client’s side and get to the bottom of their difficulties. The industry most filled with autists seems to be the medical profession. You will be lucky to find a GP or surgeon on the spectrum to treat you. In fact I am being approached by GPs and will be doing a promotion to root out neurodivergent health professionals who need my services.
Safe space
Because many of us have sensory issues it’s quite important to create an environment that meets the needs of ND types. Some people are over stimulated some under stimulated. Maybe not too many distractions and a quiet, softly lit room is possibly a good idea.
I am coeliac, have asthma, and all my life have had issues with my feet. As a child I was often tripping over so spent many summers with scabby knees. I bounce when I walk which I now remember many have commented on. I stupidly did a 26 mile walking marathon which damaged my planter fascias and achilles then last year broke both my ankles. One has a metal plate in it. Before this I went over on my ankles a few times spraining them and was tripping over things often. I have dyscalculia and traits of Rejection Sensitivity Dsyphoria (RSD) and I am treating more clients who are Highly Sensitive People (HSP). Many ND clients have OCD and are misdiagnosed with bipolar, Boarderline Personality Disorder and other emotional regulation conditions.
I like very hot food and very cold food. Hot baths and cold swims. Also very spicy food. I stim in various ways including singing, knitting, colouring in, doodling, running my fingers over my fingernails, chewing the inside of my mouth, wrapping myself up in soft blankets and dancing to loud music. I also love classical. I smell memories and see faces in many things in nature. I love collecting things and know a great deal about nature and animals. I’m an expert in Robert Hichens (Titanic history) and I’m a published author with three books in the pipeline about my life on the spectrum, #adventuresofanaspiegirl, Adventures of an Aspie Women and Adventures of and Aspie Granny. I’m very sensitive to daylight, I hate being touched softly and can’t bear alarms, sirens, horns, dogs barking, planes and air conditioning or sounds that are just wrong. Love nature sounds/sights. Love cats.
The world of Neurodivergence is in desperate need of lots of Counsellors who are trained, experienced or who have Neurodivergent conditions themselves. I spoke to a GP the other day and she told me that she has seen more neurodivergent patients in the past 3 months in quick succession than in her whole 20 years practicing. I couldn’t believe it!
Here are some more books I have read which have been so educational:
Pretending to be normal, Liane Holliday Willey
Going Official! On getting a diagnosis of adult ADHD, Ash Banks
Spectrum Warrior, Walking to the beat of autism, Barb Cook
Divergent Mind, Jenara Nerenberg, audiobook or paperback
Autism and Aspergers Syndrome in Adults, Luke Beardon
The Jumbled Jigsaw, Insiders Approach to the treatment of ASD, Donna Williams (recently deceased)
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-52398144
https://www.bbc.co.uk/bitesize/articles/zrc8d6f
https://www.adhdfoundation.org.uk
https://www.autism.org.uk
I have a new Instagram account called aspie.sal
My aim is to be an advocate for autism, ADHD and neurodivergence in general. Please get in touch for working together opportunities at [email protected]