The (Un)Welcome Series

For those of you who aren't in the communications or fundraising fields, a "welcome series" is a series of emails you send to people who recently donated or subscribed to your email list. The goals are many, but they include making people feel appreciated and inspired and leaving them wanting to hear more from you.

I recently received an email from a list I joined maybe one month ago. Rather than the qualities listed above, it left me feeling offended, angry, and like I was putting him off by being on his list at all.

To be fair, it is hard to be heard above the noise online, and there is a movement toward being edgy, personal, and controversial. However, as someone who was on his list to learn more about his approach to his work, I don't think I deserved to be told to f-off quite so soon. I might have stayed on, red his stuff, and eventually hired him if I felt his thoughts were providing value.

But you be the judge. Here is the email:

Dear Mark, I’ve enjoyed sending you a few little “love” notes, as they are, since you signed up for the [Organization] newsletter. But just like in real life, sometimes there’s a disconnect. Like you just don’t jive. Sometimes your values don’t align with someone else’s… and you usually figure it out pretty quick.? You know what I mean? Up until now, I don’t think I’ve emailed anything too divisive. And that’s not really me anyhow. I’m not looking to pick a fight. But, here at [Organization] headquarters, we do feel strongly and stand for a lot of things that some people get upset about.? Trust me… I get those emails. Status quo work. Ugh. RFP’s. Don’t even with that crap around here. Lazy fundraisers or marketers who are looking to automate and keep everything cheap/cheerful? No. Just no. People who lack passion. For freaking – anything! I mean, WTAF? Cross armed old white dudes. People who wave their subjective opinions around like they are fact. Branding style guides… mostly fucking useless. Marketing people getting to approve fundraising. Hard pass. Scarcity over abundance mindsets. Profits over people… bullies… pictures of old guys with big checks… Gill Sans! Lord, save my soul…? Again, I’m not trying to pick a fight. But if anything in the above paragraph offends you… it might be time for you to go. As I’ve told my clients, an unsubscribe is a BRILLANT thing. Then, ?you can spend your energy speaking to people who are aligned with your mission.? I don’t want you to go, honestly! I’d love for you to stay.? But… if we aren’t right for you, it might be best to say our goodbyes. Best of luck and no hard feelings. Unsubscribe ??

Ah! Still here??? GOOD! Let’s stop fucking around and get to the hard work of caring for our donors. This work can be simple but it’s not easy. If you’re cool with that, then you might just be our next Special Agent. If you want to hang around, then just do that. If you want to book some time on how we can really get to work on improving your appeals, book some time with me here. Look forward to chatting with you soon and thanks for taking the time read this email. Agent John, over and out. P.S. Personal is better than professional. Ugly IS beautiful. Donors – not data. Dogs not cats… ok, I don’t mean that last one. I love them both… ? ?

Is it just me, or did this email miss the mark? Was I costing him anything by being on his list? Would you ever hire him (spoiler alert: I never will, because I would never want him speaking to my donors!)?

Let me know in the comments.

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