Unstuck Chapter 4 - What is Transformative Purpose?

Our world is becoming more intelligent and increasingly complex at a speed and scale that is difficult for our minds to comprehend with all the changes going on around us. Having a purpose that is transformative in nature helps us to focus on making progress in life.

Our TRANSFORMATIVE PURPOSE gives us energy to wake up every day and guides us to become better than the person we were yesterday. This is not about being the ideal. Focusing on the ideal sets us up for failure because we will always fall short, but everyone can become better if we see ourselves as work in progress.

TRANSFORMATIVE PURPOSE provides clarity on how we can become a better self, in turn inspiring those around us to become better together.

If we enjoy what we do, we are happy and we are motivated to be good at it.

People will resonate with us and appreciate it when we actively share our passion and knowledge and add value to someone else’s life and when our ego is no longer centred to please our self-orientation.

Opportunities will find you when you are relevant to others.

There are some differences between purpose and transformative purpose. I like to think that transformative purpose goes beyond our purpose, which is usually static and can be self-oriented.

Transformative purpose has the following characteristics:

1. 1. It is progressive rather than static.
2. It focuses on incremental changes rather than one-off radical “ah-ha” moments.
3. 3. It is futuristic and motivates us to change for the better.
4. It is a lifelong discovery journey that we can practise daily.
5. It radiates and has a positive impact on those around us. Others will gravitate towards your positivity. By transforming yourself, you transform others to become better.

Transformative purpose is about waking up every morning doing the thing you love, which motivates you to become a better you each and every day. And by focusing on becoming a better self, you should also commit to making positive impacts for the betterment of others and the community at large.

I am not talking about making more money or owning more material possessions. I am referring to awakening your two-year-old self who was always kind, curious and selfless towards the world.

This is about asking yourself why you are here, how you can become better than the person you were yesterday and what you can do to help make the world better for the next generation. It is also about how to channel your hidden potential and motivation as a positive force, to turn on that flywheel key for a better humanity. I believe that if we all focus on becoming a better future self together, we can co-create a much better world for the next generation.

There is a caveat that I should confess at this point. I have already suggested that discovering our transformative purpose is a progressive one. It took me 37 years and more than a few life lessons to learn this. My transformative purpose is to build a better world through positivity. But this wasn’t clear to me until I went through a series of existential questions, some ups and downs in life and had a few honest conversations with others to learn more about me. In fact, I have always suffered from “imposter syndrome” and held back on sharing my thoughts on motivation. There were countless times where I would spend a lot of time drafting something just to purge it altogether before posting it. I worried about what readers would think of this book for instance. For instance, Only 1% of people post contents on LinkedIn. My self-worth was dependent on how others perceived me and how society measured success.

I have always loved this quote from Charles Cooley which basically says that people’s views and opinions of us affect how we behave around them.

“I am not who I think I am. I am not who you think I am. I am who I think you think I am.”

But one day, a conversation changed my perception and eradicated my self-doubt. I initiated a one-on-one conversation with one of our followers, who was based in Vietnam. I wanted to learn more about her and simply wanted to dedicate my time to serving her. I was curious about what attracted her to my podcast and how I could have potentially added value in her life.

About 20 minutes into our conversation, she broke down and thanked me because she found inspiration from our podcast. She then dropped the bomb and told me that she had tried to kill herself. I was shocked.

I moved back to Asia in 2011 and worked for an international human capital consulting company, 光辉国际 . During my time there, I picked up executive coaching. My hiring manager and mentor Thomas Higgins had a huge influence on me and on who I am today. In a 1-on-1 coaching session, the coach is the listener asking questions to help the person being coached to discover more about themselves. I also learnt that we need to be very careful about what we say and how we ask, because conversations can become very emotional.

What I also learnt is that every one of us is dealing with something behind closed doors. It is the coach’s job to lend our ears to listen and empathise, and not to judge or provide answers. What I learnt from the conversation that day was that even if it is just one person’s life you can help change, it is worth doing. If you believe in the law of attraction, an enlightened person is going to motivate others to do greater things in life. Little changes ripple into bigger things.

Give permission to yourself to inspire others around you. It is a choice that only you can make.

Your Reflection

Are you contributing to the negativity spiral that is around you?

Thanks for reading.

Aaron Pang - building a positive world.