The unseen side of startups and how it changed my journey

I’m a content creator and YouTuber.

There. I said it out loud {Sigh of relief}.

But let’s take a step back for a moment.

This isn’t a fairy tale or bare all story, nor is it a sugar-coated success story. It’s the more realistic, often untold side of the startup journey. Because the world of startups is not just about big ideas and groundbreaking innovations; it’s also about the human side of entrepreneurship—the challenges of getting started, maintaining individual motivation, balancing family life, and prioritising your health amidst the chaos. And funny enough, today is the perfect example.

You see, 2 months ago I did a crazy thing.

I prioritised my family and my health. Crazy right?

And if you’re wondering, yes I am sarcastic. Yet it is the reality. Something as simple as prioritising these two things was enough for me to quit my full-time job that I very much enjoyed and pivot on a road lined with my passions, interests and expertise. And I don’t have a single regret.

But wait, did you say content creator? How is that a startup?

For me, it depends on what your intention is. You can paint as a hobby or sell your paintings as a business. You can build a model on Excel for your own productivity or take the same model to a developer and sell it to people as a subscription.

I can create content for the fun of it and post cool stuff on Instagram or I can make a business out of it. And for me, this is a startup. I aim for the stars, not just to break through the ceiling.

I’ve never seen myself as a content creator, nevermind a YouTuber. These are things that other people do. You know, the ones with talent, ideas and the know-how. Ordinary people like me don’t play in these fields.

But deep down I have this stubborn little voice refusing to keep quiet. The voice that has gotten me into trouble before when allowed to utter her thoughts out loud. The voice that always asks questions and is rarely satisfied with an answer unless it makes complete sense.

And I ignored her for many years because I was too scared of the risks of listening to her. So then she rallied up the troops and she got reinforcements and I finally caved when my health was threatened. And then I turned into a content creator. Who knew? (Check out my links at the bottom of the mail!)

So let me break this down in these 3 sections as I share my personal journey with you.

1. This thing called MOTIVATION

The emotional rollercoaster

Starting a business is like riding an emotional rollercoaster. The highs can be exhilarating —planning, market research, launching a product, getting positive feedback. But the lows —missed deadlines, failed initiatives, slow traction — can be crushing.

I was involved in many startups over the years and understand the journey but I have always shared the journey with a team. Walking this road alone has been interesting. Whereas I could check in with teammates before when the motivation felt a bit low, there is no one now to share it with. I chose to do this alone for now so I have to really find that internal motivation to keep going when I don’t feel like it.

And there is no magic formula, despite what you’re being told. No 4-hour work week or AI will fix your motivation. Well not yet, who knows what it can do in the future.

But it’s quite simple. Just keep showing up.

I’m serious. Whether you feel like it or not, just keep showing up. I recently read the book Atomic Habits by James Clear and man oh man, did it open my eyes. Apart from buckets full of tips to start building habits, my biggest takeaway was the fact that you keep showing up, even if you don’t give 100% every day, some days only 10%, the point is to show up and keep building a habit.

And that’s how I view a startup in some sense - a habit. Something that is not yet familiar but if you keep showing up, it becomes familiar and others start noticing the results of your habits.

So even though I woke up this morning not feeling like writing a newsletter at all, I showed up. It took me a good two hours to put the (virtual) pen on paper and I used every distraction possible until I ran out of excuses and then I sat down, staring at the screen. Eventually, I went to chatGPT to prompt some ideas and after a couple of generic results my brain kicked into higher gear and the words started to flow.

But I still feel less motivated today than other days so I admit I asked chatGPT to help with practical action points. Am I being too honest? Perhaps. But if we all keep pretending, then how are we supposed to learn from each other and understand that there is no golden and secret recipe to do this the right way?

Actions (as per chatGPT) to increase your motivation:

• Set Realistic Goals: Break down your larger vision into smaller, achievable milestones. Celebrate these small wins to keep your motivation high.
• Build a Support Network: Surround yourself with mentors, fellow entrepreneurs, and a supportive team who can offer encouragement and perspective.
• Practice Self-Care: Dedicate time to activities that recharge you, whether it’s a hobby, exercise, or simply taking a break. Self-care is crucial for sustaining long-term motivation. (This I can vouch for. For the first time in my life, I am enjoying the gym and I keep showing up. It’s amazing how much better I started to feel overall when I focused on my health.)

2. Prioritising your Health

The ignored priority

In the chaos of building a startup, personal health often takes a backseat. Skipping meals, neglecting exercise, and foregoing sleep can become the norm rather than the exception. That was me. And it wasn’t even my own startup. But I believed so much in the bigger purpose that I just ignored the warning signs my body was sending.

So I had a wake-up call in December last year.

See, I’ve had an irregular heart rhythm for years. It was classified as an ectopic beat and I experienced occasional palpitations. I’ve had a checkup every 5 years with a cardiologist for all these years but never needed treatment. I got used to it as well. Then I got pregnant and the rhythm got a bit wacky but it was attributed to the pregnancy and I was told to come back after my twins were born. This was in the beginning of 2020 and as you should know, Covid-19 hit and I was in the trenches of figuring out motherhood and working from home so I never went back.

Fast-forward three years later and I experienced palpitations daily. Multiple times a day and sometimes the pounding was so intense I could count my heartbeat without having to actually feel my pulse. I felt it in my neck and my chest.

And I thought nothing of it.

It was a rather stressful period for me launching a startup, battling with potty training for months, some crazy drama with a family member and having my husband studying and working full-time so he was not home much. So I figured things would be better once this phase passed. But it kept bugging me. I would feel dizzy or like I’m having a low blood sugar crash, lie down for 5 - 10 minutes and get back up to carry on. There was no time to pay attention in my mind. Until I started having chest pain one day and I thought:

“Please don’t let me die.”

I immediately made an appointment to see the cardiologist (in 2 months ironically) and after having a 24-hour ECG monitoring I was told that the palpitations were so frequent that it was causing a 30% burden on my heart. And if I keep ignoring it, it will eventually lead to heart failure when my heart muscle is affected.

I freaked out. Even in the doctor’s office when she asked me whether I had symptoms I said “Not really” even though I had many. I was so used to it that I couldn’t tell normal apart from abnormal anymore.

I was booked for a cardiac ablation procedure a few weeks later. In reality, it is not a crazy procedure, it is just very intricate. It is not even considered surgery but the fact that they would be working inside my heart, burning stuff, and that death was a potential complication of the surgery (albeit like 0.001%), sent my anxiety sky high. The surgeon wanted me to be awake during the procedure to make sure the ectopic beats didn’t disappear and that was shit scary.

In the end, the ectopic beats were so crazy that the anaesthetist could barely examine me on the day of the procedure because she was so distracted by the frequency of the ectopic beats. My ECG looked ridiculous. If I had been asleep for the procedure, I think I would have been fine. But I was awake and I could feel the burning sensation in my chest every time the machine started ticking and sending energy waves to burn the problematic areas inside my heart. After 2 hours I begged the doctor to put me out or do something because I was about to jump off the table and run away. Luckily she came to my rescue.

So four hours later, one night in hospital and a week of moving carefully with my leg (they feed the ablation catheter through the femoral artery) and I was almost back to normal. Four weeks later I had zero palpitations and I realised only then how bad they had been before, when I no longer experienced them. I had a 0% burden on my heart and for all intents and purposes, never had to worry about this again. All healed.

Why am I telling you this? Because I ignored it for the sake of work and family and all other things besides my health. That was stupid. We think that if we don’t do things right now, it will be a disaster so we push through and don’t make time for self-care.

Thankfully I have no long-term implications but it could’ve been so much different had I continued to ignore it. And it prompted me to take a long hard look at my life and the balance just didn’t make sense. I had to start over and that meant quitting my job and turning a new page. One where I prioritise my health too.

Well, let’s see what chatGPT can add (pretty spot on I’d say):

• Prioritise Physical Health: Schedule regular workouts, even if it’s a quick run or a gym session. Make time for healthy meals and avoid the temptation of fast food.
• Mental Health Matters: Recognise the importance of mental well-being. Practice mindfulness, meditation, or other stress-relief techniques to keep your mind healthy.
• Regular Check-Ups: Don’t ignore medical appointments. Regular health check-ups can catch potential issues early and keep you on track physically and mentally (Uhm ... oops).

3. Balancing Family Life

The tug-of-war

The demands of a startup can take a toll on family life. Long hours, constant stress, and the pressure to succeed can strain relationships with loved ones. It was a turning point for me when one of my kids told me one night “Mommy you’re always angry”. Geez, that pain went deep. I never felt like I failed them as much as I did at that moment. And I knew I had to make a change. There were not many variables to work with but what I needed was to be there for them, to be able to spend time with them, enjoy them and not just get irritated when their needs at 7pm were draining me even more after a long day at work.

And the only way I could see that happening was if I managed my own time. I could be there for them during the day and structure my workload to catch up in the evenings as I am a night owl in any case. And that is exactly what I did.

I tried my hand at YouTube last year and used weekends to record and late nights to edit and I was running on fumes so I stopped for a while. Then I picked it up recently and now I get to record during the week, edit and still spend time on creating content for LinkedIn, social media and start working on my healthcare consulting. I felt free. I suddenly had time to stock up my fridge, buy a baby shower present and attend a school tea party. And my kids started to be less demanding, sharing more stories with me and telling me how much they love me playing ‘restaurant’ with them. That alone made everything worth it.

But I couldn’t have done it without the support of my husband - but I think it helps that I’ve taken on a lot of his admin as well ;)

So, according to chatGPT, what you can do to try and balance family life, is the following:

• Communicate Openly: Keep your family in the loop about your startup’s demands and challenges. Open communication fosters understanding and support.
• Set Boundaries: Create clear boundaries between work and personal time. Schedule dedicated family time and stick to it, just as you would with a business meeting.
• Delegate and Share Responsibilities: Don’t hesitate to delegate tasks at work and share household responsibilities. Building a startup is a team effort, and so is maintaining a healthy family life.

So what am I doing?

I have a million ideas in my head. If I had all the resources available I’d start multiple businesses :) But I think a lot of us feel this way!

But I got the question a few times recently “What do you do?” and I didn’t really know what to say. I felt a bit embarrassed to call myself anything if I didn’t have the ‘papers’ if you know what I mean.

And then I realised that I had everything I needed. I also read the book the Unfair Advantage: How you already have what it takes to succeed - by Ash Ali and Hasan Kubba and it opened my eyes! I just got practical and started understanding what my own unfair advantage was. I’m not going to bore you with the answer but I will share with you the results of putting it all together.

I launched my official new YouTube channel and since I’m posting regularly I considered it’s time to own up to the reality and proudly call myself a YouTuber. And it’s not something in the startup space as you might have suspected. It’s another passion of mine - antenatal and childbirth education. I had my startup for 5 years but didn’t really take that it serious until now. And I started doing market research again and just realised how big the need is for evidence-based information for pregnant mothers. And I intend to fill that gap and make sure they have all the information possible to make informed decisions. As simple as that. I want better outcomes for mothers and newborns.

I launched a couple of related social media accounts and started creating content. It is really time intensive I’ll have you know, in case you were wondering. And I fixed up my website.

And now I plan to fly. Some days I don’t feel like it but then I do small things just to keep the momentum going. Other days I record like I’ve been living on Redbull energy drinks. It’s really a rollercoaster and not even the only one I’m on. This is just one aspect of my healthcare innovation journey, the rest is yet to come.

But you'll have to stick around to find out what that is all about.

Thanks for listening - do check out the resources (books) I shared above as they might just change your life!

And if you want to see what I am up to, check out my links below. And if you know of anyone who can benefit, feel free to pass on:

YouTube channel: www.youtube.com/@themidwifeonline

Website: https://midwifeonline.net/

Instagram handle: @midwifeonlinesa

TikTok handle: @themidwifeonline

Have a great week all!