Unlocking True Inner Peace: Debunking Common Myths with the Three Principles

I recently read a post on Linkedin that shared common tips on how to find ‘Inner Peace’.

I am sure the advice was well-intentioned. And on the surface the advice sounded reasonable and in some ways effective, yet something didn’t feel right to me. So I decided to take a deeper look.

In this post I will examine them through the lens of the Three Principles (3Ps) by Sydney Banks.

These principles of Mind, Consciousness and Thought offer a unique perspective on the human experience and mental well-being.

In essence, the Three Principles suggest that our mental state, awareness, and thought processes are all connected. They play a fundamental role in shaping our individual experiences and well-being moment to moment. The Three Principles are a description of how our reality works.

Put in another way, we live in the feeling of our thinking, not our circumstances.

These principles have been influential in the fields of psychology, personal development, and self-help.

Let’s dive in.

1: You Need To Control Your Thoughts

Myth: Journaling can help you control your thoughts and to define what is the root cause of our thoughts.

The Three Principles Perspective: Journaling can be a helpful tool for self-reflection and understanding our thoughts. Inner peace doesn’t rely on controlling or analyzing our thoughts.

Instead, inner peace comes from realizing that our thoughts are transient and not to be taken too seriously.

Inner peace is not found by dissecting the content of our thoughts but by understanding the nature of Thought itself. It’s about recognizing the innate wisdom within us, beyond the specifics of our thinking.

Put in another way, when we try and control our thoughts, we have more on our minds, the more we have on our minds, the more anxious we get.

It’s far easier and effective to let our thoughts come and go, which is their nature.

2. You Need To Spend More Time in Nature

Myth: Spending more time in nature can prevent your mind from thinking about stressful thoughts.

The Three Principles Perspective: Nature can provide a serene and calming environment, allowing us to temporarily escape the hustle and bustle of everyday life.

However, True inner peace is not dependent on external circumstances, including being in nature.

The source of inner peace is not the absence of stressful thoughts but understanding that our experience of life is created from within, regardless of our surroundings.

Inner peace can be found amidst chaos when we grasp the transient nature of our thoughts and emotions.

I remember I was attending a retreat in Singapore led by Michael Neill in 2019.

One of the partipants shared that when he wants to feel at peace and grounded he goes to a secluded spot by the beach in Bali, Indonesia.

He went on to share how the sound of the waves and feeling the ocean breeze in his hair helped him to be more connected with himself.

We all listened and imagined this space he was talking about. And then Michael said, “You can also find that feeling at a McDonalds too”. We all giggled.

I realized that the feeling of “home within oneself” comes from within, not from external circumstances.

You don’t need to be sitting at a beach in Bali, Indonesia to feel more at peace with yourself. You need to know that the feeling is within you. Always.

3. You Need To Be Grateful

Myth: To have more peace of mind you need to be grateful for what you have and find happiness by not complaining about what you don’t have.

The Three Principles Perspective: While cultivating gratitude is a valuable practice, it’s important to recognize that true inner peace doesn’t come from external conditions or trying to manipulate our emotions.

Inner peace arises from realizing the innate well-being that resides within us all.

It doesn’t require constant gratitude or avoiding complaints.

I remember when I first came across the idea of creating ‘gratitude lists’ every morning from the book ‘The Secret’ by Rhonda Byrne.

At first, I felt good about writing gratitude lists because it felt like I was taking control of my thoughts and emotions. By the 2nd week of following this practice I felt like it was a chore and the nice feelings from the exercise had faded. I felt like gratitude was yet ‘another thing I had to do’. I stopped.

I found that real gratitude, the gentle warm feeling of appreciation for yourself and life comes more often when you are feeling settled and clear within yourself. You have the clarity and perspective to appreciate what you have going for you in the moment.

Its important to realize that our feelings of contentment and happiness are not tied to external circumstances or the absence of complaints. They are inherent qualities of our true nature.

4. You Need To Cultivate Acceptance and Contentment

Myth: Find peace and happiness by accepting life’s problems and mastering how to deal with them.

The Three Principles Perspective: The conventional wisdom of accepting life’s problems and developing problem-solving skills to solve them is valuable.

However, inner peace is not contingent on problem-solving or life without challenges. The nature of Life is that it’s a ‘contact sport’. Stuff is going to happen that we have no control over.

Trying to ‘master’ how to deal with problems puts all the pressure on our intellectual capacities to solve the problems, which often leads to overwhelm and burn out.

The Truth is, inner peace comes when we realize that we have an innate capacity for resilience and wisdom that can guide us through life’s ups and downs.

This innate capacity can also deliver to us just-in-time insights to help us solve our toughest challenges and problems. It’s never ever ‘all-on-us’ to make it happen.

Put in a different way, it’s about understanding that peace and contentment are within us, regardless of the external circumstances or the nature of the problems we face.

Conclusion

In the pursuit of inner peace, common tips like controlling thoughts, spending time in nature, practicing gratitude, and accepting problems can be helpful, the understanding of where true inner peace originates is far more impactful and effective.

Inner Peace comes from recognizing the inherent well-being and wisdom within ourselves, transcending the need to control, manipulate, or change external conditions.

By embracing this Truth, we can discover a profound and lasting sense of inner peace in our own lives.