Unlocking Success: Shifting Focus from Frustration to Effective Communication

How many of us have felt like the guy in the picture looks? Frustrated, at the end of our patience and not knowing what to do next.

I know I have been, and if you are being honest, so have you. We all have.

We have all, at some point in our lives, sat there and wondered why people do not understand us and have not had an idea about what our next steps should be.

Here is a hint, it is probably not the people you are aggravated with or the people you blame . . . it is YOU!

Somehow or in some way, we are not articulating to the right people, in the right way, what we need, want, fear or desire. We need to make it clear to them what our shortcomings are, what we need from them in order to help us achieve our goal and why it benefits them to help us.

Why?

More than likely, because we are phrasing it in our words, not theirs, and focusing on our interests, and not how it benefits them to lend a hand because, in the end, their wants, needs, goals and desires can be actualized by lending a hand.

We don't take the time to build alliances, allegiance and trust. We don't align our goals with theirs and we do not show them how by reaching the goal, all of us will be better off because of it.

So how do we change our focus? How do we develop the skills we need to bring the right people to the table and motivate them to work with us and not against us?

Simple.

We stop, slow down and listen and look for clues as to what is working, what is not and why.

We look for people who can help us.

We find people with skills that we need to possess.

We take the time to understand what is in it for them if this project succeeds.

We take the time to understand their current reality before trying to force ours upon them.

We need to understand what motivates and scares them.

We need to understand how to augment our goals, so they align with theirs more easily.

When we care more about how what we are trying to accomplish benefits others more than ourselves, we attract the people who can turn our dreams into reality.

However, when all we do is focus on our self-interest, all we tend to do is think small and accomplish a fraction of what we are truly capable of.