Unlocking the Challenges of Passive-Aggressive Behaviour in the Modern Workplace

Introduction

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In today’s evolving workplace landscape, passive-aggressive behaviour is becoming increasingly prevalent, particularly as remote and hybrid work environments reshape how we interact. The Economist highlights how the digital space, with its reliance on emails, instant messaging, and virtual meetings, can amplify communication barriers, making it easier for indirect hostility to go unnoticed.[1] Without the non-verbal cues and immediate feedback present in face-to-face interactions, subtle forms of resistance and antagonism can flourish undetected.

This shift in communication dynamics makes it more crucial than ever for leaders and employees to recognize and address passive aggression. Left unchecked, these behaviours can silently erode team cohesion, trust, and productivity, undermining organizational culture and morale. Understanding how passive-aggressive behaviour manifests in a digital-first world—and implementing strategies to combat it—are vital steps for any modern organization committed to fostering a healthy and open workplace environment.

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The Digital Age: Fueling Passive-Aggression

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Remote work and digital communication tools have transformed workplace interactions, providing both flexibility and challenges. The Economist underscores that platforms like email, Slack, and other messaging apps often strip away the nuances of inflection and non-verbal cues, increasing the risk of misinterpretation.[2] What might seem playful or helpful when spoken in person can appear sarcastic or resentful when viewed on a screen. This disconnect creates an environment where passive-aggressive behaviour can thrive, as digital spaces allow for indirect communication that avoids immediate confrontation.

Common passive-aggressive tactics in digital workplaces include:[3]

• Emails as Weapons: Curt or sarcastic emails can convey a sense of hostility, even if they lack overtly aggressive language. The digital medium allows individuals to express frustration without having to face immediate repercussions or confrontations.
• Withholding Information: An employee might "forget" to CC a colleague or delay sharing crucial updates, subtly undermining others' work while maintaining plausible deniability.
• Procrastination and Silent Treatment: Deliberate delays in task completion or minimal responses to messages are common strategies used to assert control or express dissatisfaction without overtly refusing to comply.

Consider a case example such as Emily, a project manager, sends requests for updates from her team via email. Instead of receiving clear, timely responses, she encounters vague promises and delayed replies. While these actions seem harmless on the surface, they often reflect deeper frustrations and resentments. In digital environments, such behaviours are easier to mask, making them harder to address directly.

The Economist article likens this dynamic to Herman Melville’s Bartleby, the Scrivener, where the protagonist uses passive resistance as a form of quiet rebellion.[4] This example highlights how passive-aggression becomes a means of expressing dissatisfaction without engaging in overt confrontation—a phenomenon that modern digital workplaces must be vigilant against.

By understanding how the digital age amplifies passive-aggressive tendencies, organizations can better develop strategies to mitigate these behaviours and promote a culture of direct, open communication.

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Common Signs of Passive-Aggressive Behaviour

Passive-aggressive behaviour is often subtle, making it difficult to identify in the workplace—especially in digital and hybrid environments where communication lacks the context of non-verbal cues. Recognizing these signs early is crucial to preventing them from undermining team dynamics and productivity. According to The Economist, passive aggression is particularly insidious because it allows individuals to express antagonism or noncompliance while maintaining plausible deniability.[5]

Below are some of the most common signs of passive-aggressive behaviour[6], particularly relevant in virtual and hybrid work settings:

1. Sarcasm: Sarcasm is a hallmark of passive-aggressive behaviour, often used to mock or undermine colleagues while maintaining the appearance of humour. In written communication—like emails or chat messages—it can be particularly damaging, as the intended tone is easily misinterpreted.
2. Procrastination: Deliberately delaying tasks or responses, especially when colleagues or supervisors are waiting, serves as a passive-aggressive tactic to assert control or express dissatisfaction. This behaviour is more common in digital workplaces where individuals can delay without immediate accountability.
3. Silent Treatment: Ignoring or giving minimal responses to messages or virtual meeting invites can be a way of expressing displeasure without openly confronting the issue. This tactic creates tension, disrupts communication, and leaves colleagues uncertain of where they stand.
4. Withholding Information: Keeping vital information or feedback to oneself, even when it's necessary for the team’s success, is a subtle but damaging form of passive aggression. This tactic is particularly disruptive in remote settings, where missing information can delay projects and erode trust.
5. Backhanded Compliments: These are compliments laced with subtle criticisms or undermining remarks, such as “Your presentation was surprisingly good.” While seemingly positive, these comments are designed to demean the recipient and assert the speaker’s superiority.
6. Feigning Helplessness: Another common sign is when an individual pretends to be unable to complete a task or understand instructions, despite having the capability to do so. This tactic, highlighted by The Economist, allows the individual to evade responsibility while projecting the blame onto others for not providing enough support.

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Scenario One: The Silent Saboteur in Remote Teams

Consider John and Sarah, colleagues in a global sales team collaborating on a critical client presentation. John, working remotely, notices that Sarah consistently delays sending her sections of the work. When he politely inquires, Sarah responds with, “Oh, I guess you know better than me, right? After all, you’ve been here longer.” Her sarcastic response hints at underlying resentment but remains indirect enough to avoid a direct confrontation.

This behaviour, while seemingly minor, can escalate into a more significant issue if not addressed. In digital environments, where tone and intent are easily misread, such behaviours often go unnoticed until they cause considerable disruption to team projects and morale.

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Root Causes Behind Passive-Aggressive Behaviour

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Understanding the root causes of passive-aggressive behaviour is essential for addressing it effectively. While these behaviours can feel personal, they often stem from deeper, systemic issues within the workplace culture. As The Economist highlights, remote and hybrid work environments have compounded these challenges by increasing physical and emotional distance, making it easier for frustrations to manifest indirectly.[7]

Common Root Causes[8]:

1. Fear of Direct Conflict: Many individuals avoid direct confrontation, fearing it could escalate into a larger issue or negatively impact their professional standing. Digital workspaces, where face-to-face interactions are limited, provide a shield for expressing frustration indirectly, as employees feel safer voicing concerns through subtle, passive means.
2. Workplace Isolation: The rise of remote work has led to increased feelings of isolation, especially for those who struggle with the lack of in-person connections. This sense of disconnection can breed resentment, which often emerges as passive-aggression when individuals feel unsupported or undervalued by their teams.
3. Unclear Expectations: When job roles and responsibilities are poorly defined, employees may feel uncertain about their standing within the team or organization. This uncertainty can lead to indirect expressions of dissatisfaction, such as withholding effort, delaying tasks, or engaging in subtle sabotage, as they try to regain a sense of control or visibility.
4. Power Imbalances: Employees who perceive themselves as powerless or who lack a voice in decision-making may resort to passive-aggressive behaviour as a way to regain control. Without an open, safe channel to express their concerns directly, they might engage in indirect actions that disrupt workflow or undermine colleagues.
5. Cultural Norms and Hierarchies: In some workplace cultures, especially hierarchical or rigid ones, direct confrontation is discouraged. This can lead employees to express their grievances in more subtle ways. This is particularly true in global teams, where cultural differences in communication styles may further complicate direct interactions and create a breeding ground for passive aggression.
6. Trauma and Emotional History: Passive-aggressive behaviour may also stem from deeper psychological or emotional issues, such as past trauma or long-standing resentment. The Economist suggests that individuals who feel helpless or undervalued in their roles might use passive-aggression as a coping mechanism, giving them a sense of power without the risks of direct confrontation.[9]

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Scenario Two: Navigating Remote Work Isolation

Consider a scenario where Jamie, a remote software developer, feels increasingly isolated and disconnected from his team. He notices that he’s often left out of impromptu meetings or key project decisions, leading to growing resentment. Instead of voicing his concerns directly, Jamie starts missing deadlines and withholding updates as a way to express his frustrations.

His manager, unaware of Jamie’s feelings, sees this as a lack of commitment, further straining the relationship.?This example demonstrates how isolation and unclear expectations can drive passive-aggressive behaviour, particularly in remote environments where direct communication opportunities are limited. By understanding these root causes, managers and leaders can proactively address the factors that contribute to passive-aggression, creating a more supportive and inclusive workplace.

Strategies to Address Passive-Aggressive Behaviour in the Virtual Workplace

Effectively addressing passive-aggressive behaviour requires a proactive and multifaceted approach. Here are strategies designed to create a culture that promotes openness, reduces indirect hostility, and encourages direct communication.[10]

1. Foster Open Dialogue: Create a space where employees feel comfortable expressing their concerns directly. Regular check-ins, team-building activities, and open-door policies can help build a culture of openness. Providing training on effective communication ensures that frustrations are addressed before they escalate into passive-aggressive behaviours.

Action Tip: Encourage team members to provide constructive feedback and set the example by being transparent and approachable as a leader.

1. Establish Clear Expectations: Misunderstandings often arise when roles and responsibilities are unclear. Clearly defining job expectations and responsibilities helps reduce confusion, which can fuel passive-aggressive behaviour, especially in remote settings. This clarity minimizes the chances of frustration building up.

Action Tip: Communicate expectations clearly during onboarding and in ongoing meetings. Make sure all employees understand their roles and what is expected of them.

1. Conflict Resolution Training: Equip employees with conflict management skills through targeted training programs. Many individuals resort to passive-aggressive behaviour because they don’t know how to address conflicts directly. Conflict resolution and emotional intelligence training can empower employees to handle disputes constructively, reducing reliance on indirect tactics.

Action Tip: Incorporate self-reflection activities into training programs so employees can recognize their own communication patterns and how they may contribute to workplace tension.

1. Address Root Causes: Passive-aggressive behaviour often stems from deeper frustrations, such as feeling undervalued or experiencing perceived unfairness. Identifying and addressing these root causes is essential to resolving the behaviour effectively. Managers should create opportunities for employees to voice their concerns in a supportive environment.

Action Tip: Engage in one-on-one discussions with employees to uncover any underlying issues contributing to passive-aggression. Open these dialogues with empathy and a willingness to address the root causes.

1. Use a Trauma-Informed Approach: Passive-aggressive behaviour can sometimes be linked to deeper emotional or psychological issues, such as past trauma. Creating a safe, supportive environment for open discussions—where individuals feel comfortable expressing concerns without fear of judgment—is crucial in these cases.

Key Components of a Trauma-Informed Approach:

1. Recognize the Impact of Trauma: Understand how past experiences may influence behaviour and responses in conflict situations.
2. Promote Empathy and Open Communication: Foster a culture of empathy to facilitate understanding and resolution.
3. Collaborative Problem-Solving: Work together to find solutions, involving employees in the process to promote ownership and accountability.

Action Tip: Train managers on trauma-informed practices and provide access to professional counselling services for employees needing additional support.

1. Leverage HR Support: If passive-aggressive behaviour persists despite initial interventions, involving HR can be an effective way to mediate conflicts and address long-standing issues. HR professionals can offer impartial support, facilitate structured dialogues, and implement formal conflict resolution strategies.

Action Tip: Engage HR to help mediate if the situation escalates or persists. They can implement strategies to guide the team toward a healthier, more collaborative dynamic.

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Scenario Three: Addressing Remote Work Challenges

In a hybrid team, Sarah, a marketing lead, notices that her colleague Jamie frequently misses deadlines and sends delayed responses to critical project updates. Sensing that these actions might be rooted in deeper frustrations, Sarah schedules a one-on-one video call to check in with Jamie. Rather than confronting him about the delays, she opens with, “I noticed things have been a bit stressful lately—how are you managing everything? Is there anything I can do to support you?”

Jamie shares his feelings of isolation and his frustration about unclear expectations. By using empathy and open communication, Sarah uncovers the root cause of Jamie’s passive-aggressive behaviour. Together, they set clear goals and establish regular check-ins to ensure better communication and support moving forward. This proactive approach prevents further conflict and strengthens their working relationship.

Real-life Insights: The Recurring Cycle of Passive-Aggressive Behaviour

In my workplace restoration practice, interviewing employees across various levels and professional backgrounds, a recurring pattern of behaviours has emerged. This cycle, often composed of negative criticism, seeking forgiveness, and gaslighting is particularly challenging to address and can significantly impact workplace dynamics. Let’s break down each stage of this cycle and discuss strategies for managing it effectively, supported by contemporary insights.

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Negative Criticism

Negative criticism[11] often takes the form of unfairly pointing out flaws, mistakes, or shortcomings in ways designed to undermine or hurt others. It may sound like: “You always mess things up, don’t you?” or “Your presentation was surprisingly well done today.” These comments are subtly designed to create doubt and insecurity.

According to The Economist, passive aggression in the workplace often involves this type of indirect criticism. The article describes how passive-aggressive individuals may use seemingly polite or ambiguous comments to mask their true intentions: “The colleague who is reliably generous with ‘compliments’ such as ‘Your presentation was surprisingly good.’” These statements create confusion and can be disarming, allowing the critic to maintain plausible deniability.[12]

Action Tip: It’s crucial to recognize negative criticism when it occurs and address it promptly and assertively. Using “I” statements, such as “I felt undermined when you commented on my work that way,” can shift the focus to respectful communication.

Seeking Forgiveness

After the criticism is delivered, individuals may attempt to seek forgiveness[13] to mitigate the consequences, often without truly taking accountability. For example, they might say: “I didn’t mean to upset you; I’m sorry,” but their tone or behaviour remains unchanged. This step in the cycle is designed to maintain the illusion of innocence while avoiding responsibility for the negative impact.

The Economist highlights this behaviour, noting that passive-aggressive individuals often issue apologies or explanations that shift blame onto the recipient: “I’m sorry if you took exception to what I said.” This tactic projects the issue onto others, suggesting that any offence taken is their responsibility, rather than acknowledging any wrongdoing.[14]

Action Tip: While promoting forgiveness is healthy, emphasize the need for genuine accountability. Encourage individuals to reflect on their behaviour and its impact, reinforcing that apologies should be followed by constructive actions.

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Gaslighting

Gaslighting[15] involves manipulating someone to doubt their own perception, memory, or reality. In the workplace, it might manifest as: “You’re overreacting. That never happened.” or “I think I did tell you when you asked me that I’ve been very stressed lately.” This stage of the cycle aims to shift blame and create uncertainty, making the target question their own interpretation of events.

The Economist underscores this dynamic, explaining how passive-aggressive behaviour can create situations where hostile actions are disavowed: “Hostile or obstructive behaviour is at once performed and disavowed, so that the offender can assure you that he or she certainly didn’t intend whatever irritation you may now feel.” This tactic leaves the recipient feeling at fault, fostering confusion and self-doubt.[16]

Action Tip: Recognize gaslighting and stay grounded in your experiences. When faced with these tactics, trust your instincts and seek validation from colleagues or HR. Engaging in open, honest dialogue with the individual exhibiting this behaviour can also be an effective way to express concerns and explain why such behaviour is harmful and counterproductive. If the behaviour persists, document interactions and seek support from a supervisor or HR to address the issue formally.

Conclusion: Time for a Culture Shift

Passive-aggressive behaviour has become a significant challenge in the modern workplace, especially in remote and hybrid environments where communication barriers can intensify misunderstandings. Left unaddressed, passive-aggressive behaviour can erode team trust, diminish productivity, and impact morale, creating a cycle of hidden frustrations.

As highlighted by recent findings from The Economist, passive aggression thrives in environments where direct expression is seen as risky, often resulting in behaviours that hinder workplace harmony and growth. Recognizing the signs early and fostering a culture of open dialogue, accountability, and empathy can prevent these behaviours from becoming entrenched.

Creating this shift requires committed leadership, strategic communication, and proactive conflict management. By implementing trauma-informed approaches, establishing clear expectations, and encouraging constructive feedback, organizations can transform passive-aggressive tendencies into positive interactions that fuel collaboration and respect.

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Reach out Today: Let’s Build a More Harmonious Workplace

If you or your team are facing passive-aggressive challenges, it’s time to take action. At No?l & Co. Inc., we specialize in fostering healthier, more resilient workplace cultures. Contact us today to schedule a consultation and begin building a more open, harmonious work environment where every voice is heard and valued.

[email protected]

613-530-3636

[1] Cohen, J. (2023, November 21). Passive aggression: The stealthy saboteur of modern workplaces. The Economist. Retrieved from https://www.economist.com/

[2] Ibid.

[3] Long, N., & Whitson, S. (2018). The Angry Smile: The New Psychological Study of Passive Aggressive Behavior at Home, in School, in Relationships, in the Workplace & Online. Hagerstown, MD: The LSCI Institute.

[4] Cohen, J. (2023, November 21). Passive aggression: The stealthy saboteur of modern workplaces. The Economist. Retrieved from https://www.economist.com/

[5] Ibid.

[6] Long, N. & Whitson, S. (2018).?The Angry Smile: The New Psychological Study of Passive Aggressive Behavior at Home, in School, in Relationships, in the Workplace & Online.?Hagerstown, MD: The LSCI Institute.?Passive-Aggression in the Workplace | Psychology Today

[7] Cohen, J. (2023, November 21). Passive aggression: The stealthy saboteur of modern workplaces. The Economist. Retrieved from https://www.economist.com/

[8] Ni, P. (2020). 7 Signs of Gaslighting at the Workplace. Psychology Today.?7 Signs of Gaslighting at the Workplace | Psychology Today

[9] Cohen, J. (2023, November 21). Passive aggression: The stealthy saboteur of modern workplaces. The Economist. Retrieved from https://www.economist.com/

[10] Long, N. & Whitson, S. (2018).?The Angry Smile: The New Psychological Study of Passive Aggressive Behavior at Home, in School, in Relationships, in the Workplace & Online.?Hagerstown, MD: The LSCI Institute.?Passive-Aggression in the Workplace | Psychology Today

[11] Timms, M. (2022). Blame Culture is Toxic. Here’s How to Stop It. Harvard Business Review.?Blame Culture Is Toxic. Here’s How to Stop It. (hbr.org)

[12] Cohen, J. (2023, November 21). Passive aggression: The stealthy saboteur of modern workplaces. The Economist. Retrieved from https://www.economist.com/

[13] Brown, D. (2021). The Professional Way To Handle Apologies And Forgiveness. Forbes.?The Professional Way To Handle Apologies And Forgiveness (forbes.com)

[14] Cohen, J. (2023, November 21). Passive aggression: The stealthy saboteur of modern workplaces. The Economist. Retrieved from https://www.economist.com/

[15] Ni, P. (2020). 7 Signs of Gaslighting at the Workplace. Psychology Today.?7 Signs of Gaslighting at the Workplace | Psychology Today

[16] Cohen, J. (2023, November 21). Passive aggression: The stealthy saboteur of modern workplaces. The Economist. Retrieved from https://www.economist.com/