Unleash The Power Within, Tony Robbins Style

If you’ve never been to a Tony Robbins event you’re probably a little cynical about “that guy in the infomercials.”  Which is fine. A little cynicism in an age of gurus adoration is a healthy thing.

Robbins may seem to be full of ego from afar, but when you get to experience the man behind the brand, you'll find he's all heart. And at 6'7", it's a big one. So having just spent a few days with the master of 'personal transformation,' I can now recommend parking your cynicism for a few days and doing the same. Whether it changes your life or not, I can guarantee you’ll never regret it. And I don’t make guarantees like that lightly. 

The 'keys to success' below are one’s I’ve written about before, but all bear repeating. I hope a few will “unleash the power within” you (the name of Tony's trademark UPW weekend event) or just remind you to do more of what you already know brings out your best. I’ve yet to meet anyone who doesn’t benefit from a regular reminder. Tony included. 

1. Get clear about what you want.

It's basic logic really. How can you ever create the life of your dreams if you have no idea what that would look like.  That's not to say you have to know ever element of your idea life, but you need to be clear about the values you'd be honouring if you created it.

Family. Contribution. Creativity. Improving the status quo. Community. Growth. Love. Leadership. Service. Advocacy. Playfulness. Purpose. 

So before you do anything else, give yourself some empty time with a blank page to map out what a truly extraordinary life looks like for you – physically, financially, spiritually, emotionally, in your relationships, the work you do and the impact you make.

Creating a vision for the future you want provides a compass to guide you forward - to help you know what to steer away from and what to steer toward.   Without a compass, you may end up some place you don't much like. Millions do. 

2. Know why you want it!

So get crystal clear about why it's so important for you to pursue your big vision and achieve the goals that move you toward it. What lies at stake if you don’t? If it’s not meaningful enough, you won’t stay the course when the going gets tough.

When your why is about serving something bigger than your need for significance, you'll find the inner resources to figure out the hows. As I wrote in Stop Playing Safe, "A clear sense of purpose will compel you out of your comfort zone and to risk failure for something more important." 

3. Take action, massive action!

The more you act in the presence of fear the more you dilute its power & amplify your own. 

It’s easy to live with excuses and justifications about why you can’t do what you want, at least not now. Maybe later. But inaction exacts an increasingly steep toll on our lives. Nothing is a more powerful antidote to fear than action. Daily action. Massive action. Brave action.  

So don’t wait until you have all your ducks lined up in a row, have mastered perfection or know everything there is to know before you step into action.   Start talking to people. Extend an invitation. Risk a rejection. Join a group. Attend a class.  Find a mentor. Introduce yourself to an influencer. Offer your services. Get your finances in order. Ask for help. Learn a skill. Read a biography. Hire a coach. Just-do-something! Every. Single. Day.

4. Reframe problems.

“The past does not equal the future. Unless you live there.” - Tony Robbins

So you’ve got problems – the tough economy, a lousy boss, unsupportive family, too few resources, too much debt. Join the boat! It’s not your problems that keep you from creating what you want, it’s the story you tell yourself about them. To quote Tony, “See things as they are but not worse than they are. Your problems are really just invitations to step through fear.”

You don’t see the world as it is, but as you are. Accordingly, the words you use to describe your past, present and future create the reality you inhabit. If you cast yourself as a helpless victim, you’ll be just that. If you cast yourself as the master of your fate, you’ll be that too. You can’t change your history, but you can rewrite your story of it to expand the possibilities for your future. 

6. Make fear your ally

Too often we cast fear as ‘the enemy’ when in fact, if fear wasn’t wired into our DNA we humans wouldn’t be here!  Rather than vilifying fear you need to harness its energy and make it work for you.  You can do that by focusing not on what might happen if you fall short of achieving the results you want, but how you will feel if you do nothing and play it safe. 

Fear regret more than failure.

Psychologists call this “Neuro-Associative Conditioning.” I call it ‘Flipping Fear’ to turn it into your ally. You can do this by stepping into your future self and imagining how you’ll feel in the years to come if you let the fear that’s undermined your actions to now continue to pilot your life. Get really present to how it will cost you. Visualize yourself staring at yourself in a mirror 1, 5, 10, 25 years from now if you’ve let it continue to keep you from stepping up to the plate in your life and doing whatever it takes to achieve what you want. 

7.  Adjust course as you go.

“The results you get in life aren’t from one single decision, but from what you do after you make the decision.” - Tony Robbins

Whenever you take a plane flight, most of the time it’s off course by a few degrees. It’s the micro adjustments the pilot makes en route that enable it to land in the right place. Likewise, keep your eye open for how you need to be adjusting your approach as you navigate your way from current Point A to desire Point B. If you aren’t getting the results you want, change what you’re doing. Anything else is a surefire recipe for landing a long way off course from your intended destination.

Successful people are always monitoring their progress, and continually adjusting what they are doing to produce better results in response to the changing environment around them. They also don’t let setbacks and failures stop them. They learn the lessons, change their strategy, and press on.

8.  Create daily rituals for ’peak state.’

When you are feeling passionate, brave, focused, purposeful and absolutely determined to achieve a particular outcome, you’re unstoppable. When obstacles arise, you find a way around them. When setbacks happen, you bounce back fast. When people reject you, you move on. It’s not personal, just par for the course of achieving anything worthwhile. While I’ve always just thought of this as being ‘my best-self’, Tony Robbins calls this being in your ‘peak state.’ It’s a powerful term made all the more so when you embody it. 

The question is: What will it take to be in your ‘peak state’ every day? How could you start your day more purposefully so you can be more focused through the day? How can you look after your body better, in ways that optimize energy, process stress and sustain energy? What new habits can you nurture that replace old destructive habits of thought and behavior? It’s the small things you do that few see which create the big results everyone wants. Below is a video I created with five rituals that I’ve found help me be in peak state! 

9. Embrace uncertainty.

"Your level of success lies in direct proportion to how comfortable you are with uncertainty." Tony Robbins

Most people want to feel in control of their lives and able to make decisions based on a future they can predict with certainty. But let’s face it, no matter how much you may try to control your environment, you can’t. Life is inherently uncertain and any certainty you think you have (beyond death and taxes) is mere illusion. Embracing life’s uncertainty liberates you to be decisive amid ambiguity and quicker to adjust your sails as the wind changes around you (rather than flipping out because it wasn’t in the weather forecast!)

10.  Schedule priorities.

If you aren’t deliberate in how you prioritize your time, other people’s priorities will consume it. So schedule in your "MUST DO” activities into your calendar – for exercise, family, reflection, planning and the rituals to achieve your ‘peak state.’  Assuming you’ll just find the time amid the busyness of your life is fanciful thinking.

11.  Find your ‘A team.’

Never underestimate the impact of the people around you to move you forward or hold you back. As Tony Robbins said “Your life is a direct reflection of the expectations of those around you.” So if the people your surrounded by aren't bringing out your best, step out of your social comfort zone and find people who will. Because, for better or worse, you can’t help but become more like the people you have surrounding you. As I wrote in Brave, "Walk with giants."

12. Find something to be grateful for in every situation 

“The more you share your gifts to serve others, the more you’ll get the gifts you want.” - Tony Robbins

Gratitude is the most powerful tonic for life yet too often we focus on what is missing from our lives and what we don’t have rather than on all that we do. It keeps us living in scarcity, fuels resentment, self-pity and a sense of powerlessness. So stand guard of your mind and when you catch yourself dwelling on what’s missing, refocus your attention on all that you already have. Because no matter how dire things may seem, there is always something to be grateful for. 

Celebrating even the small things – from the winter sun to the summer heat (you’re alive!), from your ability to read this article (many can’t), to the roof over your head (that many would love), from your toddlers’ tantrum to your teenagers untidy room (ah, the blessing of children) – can make a profound difference to both your health and happiness.

Cultivating gratitude amplifies the blessings in your life, fuels positive emotions and keeps you from making small problems big.

People who have a habit of forever focusing only on what’s missing – what they can’t do, or don’t have – will always be miserable… no matter how much fame or fortune they have! Don’t be one of them and if you have been, decide now to change that (and buy yourself a gratitude journal like Oprah uses!)

Because if there’s one thing that was reinforced from my week with Tony Robbins, it’s that all it takes to change your life is deciding that the time has arrived to step up and do just that.

Thanks for the reminder Tony.

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