Understanding Your Brain for Sustainability

Do you feel like a high-performance vehicle running on a few cylinders less than it needs to? Are you continually feeling like you are not able to be who you need to be in certain parts of your day, and you feel exhausted when you get home?

Well, stick with me because this week I want to help you understand why that is so we can do something about it.

Hi, this is Grant Herbert, leadership and sustainable performance coach, and today I want to continue this conversation we started last week around shifting from high performance to sustainable performance by helping you understand your brain.

For many years, I just worked flat out. I thought the more I did, the more people would like me, and the more I'd get done. It also made me feel like I was in control of what might happen. However, it was exactly the opposite. And because I was operating out of those 3 universal fears of not being enough, not belonging, and not being loved, I was in the performance trap of needing people's approval and was a people pleaser. Everything I did had the wrong motive which was for me to prove to myself, and the world, that I was good enough. This took its toll, not just on me and my health, but on all of my relationships and on every single person that I came in contact with.

In the 40-odd years of my career, I've had several physical and a couple of mental breakdowns.

Sometimes when I tell people that I know they might be thinking: "Well, why would we listen to you? You clearly don't know what you're talking about if you repeated the same breakdown." Well, it's, in fact, the opposite. The fact that I have navigated through those breakdowns, and overcome the underlying psychology behind why I was trying to be all things to all people, means I can bring you experiential learning that you can apply in your life. I know it works and my heart is to serve you so that you don't have to go through what I went through. I'm 62 years old, and I'm still recovering from the effects of the stress that I put my body through.

I remember my last breakdown quite well.

I was up on the 27th floor of a building in Sydney, doing what I love — giving and performing. I was with a law firm and was doing a presentation around emotional intelligence. Everything was going great. The lawyers were really engaged, and they seemed to love what I was doing. I was on a high, but then, all of a sudden, it felt like the whole world just came crashing in, and even if it was a sunny day outside, it felt like a dark cloud had descended upon me. I didn't know what was happening, and I had never felt these feelings so intensely.

Instead of stopping, checking in, and exercising self-care, I kept going, ignoring my feelings, and thought I just needed to get it done.

I was operating in the performance trap. I cared about what others thought of my perceived weakness so I hid it from them to the detriment of my own health. Anything could have been happening, but I didn't care. I was just in the zone making sure that they didn't know. So, I finished the presentation, we shook hands, and they walked me to the lift.

However, the moment the lift doors closed, and I was just there alone, I started thinking, "What's going on? What's happening to me? Was I having a heart attack, a stroke?"

I didn't understand it because I never felt that way before.

I had several other meetings that day, and I just got on the train and went home.

I went to the doctor, and it started a long journey of trying to find out what was wrong with me. Eventually, I discovered I had stage 3 adrenal fatigue and had worn my body out physically and mentally. This led me to learn more about why these things were happening. I became a neuroscience nerd, fascinated by how the brain works with other body functions and the nervous system.

I'm not a neuroscientist, and as Dr. Sarah Mackay, my neuroscientist says, "If you want to learn neuroscience, go to a neuroscientist." And I totally agree with her because so many things out there are still being taught that are incorrect. Old neuroscience has been debunked through the advent of fMRI, where we now know things in real-time with live people rather than needing to wait until someone passes away and then cut into their brain. So, I'm not here as a neuroscientist. I'm here as someone who has a passion for understanding more about why the brain is so important to be looked after so that we can perform even in high performance but do it in a sustainable way.

Everything I teach you through this shift from high to sustainable has strategies. It has things you can do differently but is grounded in science.

Today, I just wanted to open the door on this and help you to understand, in layman's terms, how the brain affects your performance.

Your brain is the centre of all your energy, decisions, and bodily functions. It's like the engine in that high-performance vehicle, and it needs to be looked after. So, let's understand what goes on in there. In your day-to-day life, things going on within and externally will affect your performance. These are the things that particularly were a part of that psychology that led me to perform in an unhealthy way that then gave me that breakdown.

Dr. Mackay teaches a very simple model that I love because when you are able to understand things (even in simple terms) it makes it easier to employ strategies because you now know why it's going to work.

As a child, I'd be pulling things apart all the time. In my early career as an automotive engineer, I’d be pulling my car apart all the time. My mum would go, "What are you doing? Why are you pulling the engine out of your car?"And it was because I knew how.

I've always had that curiosity but now that curiosity came out of necessity.

So, let's look at this quick model so you understand. Then, as we move forward next week, we'll look at some more strategies, using this understanding, that will help you avoid burnout.

There are 3 ways that we want to look at your brain and how it's being influenced.

The first one is top-down, which is when your brain speaks to the rest of your body.

Your brain sends signals to the rest of your body for it to perform in a certain way. Particular nerves within your nervous system, such as the vagus nerve, regulate your heartbeat, breathing, and blood pressure. When your brain perceives something in a certain way, it prepares your body to navigate that. I know you’re familiar with the fight, flight and freeze response, and you might have a limited understanding of stress and what happens.

I'm not here to teach you all of that, but I want you to understand that the brain needs to be in a state to notice what's going on and send the right signals.

You need that filter system that allows your prefrontal cortex to make great decisions about your actions.

The second one is bottom-up, which are the signals that are sent from your body to your brain. They could be in the form of a little niggle, pain or sensation that is then interpreted by the brain. What you make that mean will depend on how it's interpreted. How it's interpreted will then lead you to think in a certain way, leading you to behave in a certain way.

So, the influences are not just top-down to your body. Your body also speaks to the brain. Therefore, you need to listen to your body.

When you feel a certain way, like I what I felt standing on that 27th floor doing that presentation, you need to listen.

If it's not something that you understand, you need to find out what's going on.

The third area is outside-in.

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Grant Herbert (aka The People Builder) describes himself as an ordinary guy, with an outstanding wife and 5 amazing kids, who has a passion to help people escape the performance trap and regain their authenticity in every area of life. He is a VUCA Leadership Mentor, Sustainable Performance Coach, Master Coach Trainer in Social and Emotional Intelligence,?and the founder of People Builders.

Visit www.grantherbert.com to find out how you can connect.