Understanding the Complex Dynamics of Bullying: Insights from Fika Conversations

Another insight emerged from our recent fika conversations. I was discussing with my professor in the department the complex issue of who is to blame in situations of #bullying. Initially, there were two predominant schools of thought: one that places the blame squarely on the bully and advocates for support for the bullied, and another that sought a detailed understanding. However, as our conversation evolved, we concluded that the situation is far more complex.

We identified three actors in the bullying dynamic: the bully, the bullied, and the bystanders. The bullied individual can attempt to raise their voice, but fear of further bullying or retaliation might deter them, especially if the bystanders are unsupportive or indifferent. The bully might be acting out due to frustration or past negative experiences. The crux of our discussion, however, centered on the bystanders. It became clear that bystanders who remain silent, neither supporting nor opposing the bullying, play a crucial role. Their silence can be interpreted as tacit approval, encouraging the bully and further disheartening the victim.

A poignant quote highlighted in our discussion was that "the only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing." This perspective shifts the focus from the bully and the bullied to the observers. Their neutrality and inaction can inadvertently support bullying. It underscores the difficulty in eradicating bullying, as those observing may be reluctant to voice their opposition or support, whether for moral reasons or due to fear of becoming involved.

From my viewpoint, the worst action is not the act of bullying itself but being passive and failing to speak out against it. Those who ignore or avoid acknowledging bullying might be unwittingly fostering such behaviors in society. While this remains a topic for further discussion, our next fika conversation aims to explore strategies for effectively combating bullying in society