Under Pressure, Who Do You Become?

Three years ago, I wrote an article on this topic. It was before the financial downturn, but we were on the way there. I knew many leaders were tired after the pandemic, and now it was time for a new big challenge – a marathon. Since then, I believe many have discovered truths about what happens under pressure—to themselves, society, leaders, colleagues, and families. I have too. It’s time to summarize year four.

But first, let’s revisit the history of People Heart Business. My timing was impeccable. I started the company in the middle of the pandemic, during the toddler years, followed by a financial downturn. Add to that life itself: pregnancy depression while carrying our second child, a construction company going bankrupt mid-renovation in our home, and the loss of a third child.

Yet this company was founded with the strong conviction that the business world needed something different.

Just before starting the company, I was on maternity leave – the best period of my life. Contrary to expectations of sleepless nights and misery, I had the happiest baby I’d ever met and a seven-month vacation with a mascot. During this time, I had an epiphany: I realized I had never been fully recovered in my life.

With a background as an elite athlete in two sports, a complicated family history, a strong career focus, a rich social life and high drive paired with lower emotional stability, I had grown accustomed to pushing myself harder than I should. And it wasn’t a problem—for anyone. The companies I worked for were content. I was happy with the results and my life. But during maternity leave, I found myself happier, smarter, calmer, more creative, more caring. A realization I would never have had if it wasn’t for this child and my maternity leave. I would never have missed that part of me, because I didn’t know it existed. This layer that got the best out of me and potentially the most valuable to myself, my family and perhaps also the business. It’s a layer with little support system in the business world. Most organizations are content with the old version of me: a high performer who could sustain over time without burning out. So was I.

Every time I meet someone who has had the privilege to leave that system and have started a life with more freedom and flexibility, still working but on their terms—I reflect. It’s as if they’re high on life, radiating and almost provoking energy of loving life in all dimensions. That’s the energy I wanted to build People Heart Business on.

What if we could build a company where that feeling could scale?

Don’t get me wrong: I’m a psychologist, so I know feelings come and go. You can’t lock in one emotion. But what if we could shift the baseline? Not settle for less than happiness and wellbeing over time.

If that could be my top priority as CEO, what would happen?

It’s a totally different mindset. It’s innovation. It’s a vision that attracts – something desired. But it also goes against norms. Breaking norms is difficult. How many people could you recruit who have built this before? Who has the self-leadership to top perform and listen to their true needs? Breaking individual norms is perhaps even harder.

Add to that the increasing pressure in the business world. Many organizations are pressured to show short-term results. Some people are clear on their values, prioritizing wellbeing above all. Others are highly driven toward top performance. How many succeed with the combination?

Higher pressure brings realism to organizations. It clarifies priorities, increases focus and builds a valuable understanding of critical aspects to survive. Expectations become clearer. But what happens to creativity, happiness as fuel, innovation, and trust? Who do you trust under pressure?

My worst leadership moment this year was when one project team had missed out on a key priority that could ruin our company. I invited the team to a crisis meeting and talked about how serious the situation was. I also emphasized that it must be okay to fail, discussed psychological safety, and invited to reflect on what we could learn. Two team members quickly understood the situation, but the third went into defense mode. The more defensive, the more I attacked from my side. This team member was in a tough situation in life. Why didn’t I see what was happening? Why did I just continue attacking? The employee didn’t need more clarity but needed support to take it in and needed me to see my part. This trust took a long time to rebuild. The team had seen who I become under pressure.

There are moments and questions that are hard to leave at work. They are with me when I pick up my kids, when I wake-up a Saturday morning or when I am supposed to enjoy life?in?other?ways.

I thought last year was the most difficult for me. Then I realized this year was harder. But maybe next year or the year after that will be the most difficult? When I occasionally excuse myself to my partner with, “It’s an intense period in my life right now,” he often smiles and asks, “How long has this period been going on?”

But sometimes, it’s not with a smile.

A wake-up call came in the spring when my partner, during a fight, screamed, “Your company is ruining our relationship, Klara.”

And he was right.

I was filled with anxiety again. I wanted his comfort. I got mad when I didn’t get it. He was my support system, and now he wasn’t delivering.

Is this still the dream I am living? Building this company?

I have high ambitions for so many aspects of life and for People Heart Business. This year has been full of difficult questions. Some are because of the world around us, some because of having two small kids, some because of who I am, and some because of who is in my team and how this year has been for them.

This year, for the first time, I’ve been scared. Scared of who I’m becoming under pressure. Scared of the difficult questions that can and will pop up unexpectedly.

I have realized I need to build a company that is strong enough for the worst days – for the world’s, our customers’, our team’s, and my own. But also, for my family’s.

When I talk about the company’s development, people often express admiration. They see the good aspects. I do too. But my strongest realization this year is that I’m not as connected to them as I want to be.

Pressure has shifted my brain to focus on problems and risks. Who is setting this pace and pressure in the organization? It’s me—and my driven employees. A potentially toxic combination, unless paired with a high focus on wellbeing and sustainability.

My biggest conclusion this year: Realism, prioritization, and focus must be paired with an even stronger focus on wellbeing, positive reinforcement, and psychological safety. Fear, stress or performance anxiety cannot be the fuel of People Heart Business—or me.

To help my brain, here are some achievements we can take humble pride in from this year:

• Thanks to how we have been building our organization, we got a call from a UN initiative asking us to help them build a sustainable business world by strengthening their organization.
• We signed the largest contract in our history with a partner we love supporting on their quest to develop the business world.
• My COO took time off in a situation where we needed her the most to fulfill a personal dream – traveling the world for 2.5 months.
• We continued saying no to opportunities that were not in line with our strategy, even when the pipeline was almost empty.
• We received 500 applicants for our first official job ad.
• We remained radical about positive reinforcement – it is not optional in our company. If you haven’t given ~5 instances of positive reinforcement, you are not allowed to criticize.
• We prioritized strategic initiatives and time together through both ups and downs.
• When my employees noticed I was becoming controlling, I received constructive feedback, empathy for the pressure, and we launched a strategic initiative to ensure we were all in control of the critical aspects of the company, with clearer expectations for each of us.
• We had the toughest and most honest conversations in the company’s history about expectations and collaboration.
• I helped one of my employees, a true performer I certainly didn’t want to lose, write an application for their next career step because it was their dream. We (I) cried together when the application was accepted.
• I realized I can’t wait to increase priority of my own wellbeing – I need to build myself strong enough to handle the ups and downs of the company and enjoy the ride. This is just as much strategic work with setting up the company as a personal journey.

As the philosopher Alan Watts once noted and one of my employees inspired us around, we don’t say “work the piano”; we say “play the piano.”

And for me I can relate, we don’t say “work sports.” We say “play sports.”

I want to play People Heart Business – that is still my dream!

(Since September, a lot has happened, including the addition of three new employees. I am extremely grateful that more people—employees, partners, and customers—want to join People Heart Business to help us revolutionize the business world.)