The Under-Dog Mentality: Basking in the Glory of Being the Only One

In sports, we often hear terms like "underdog" and "favorite" thrown around. When Manchester City, a football powerhouse, faces a lesser-known team like Swansea, the narrative is clear: Swansea is the underdog, and City, the champion, is expected to win. The pressure is on the champion to maintain dominance, while the underdog faces little expectation. This analogy helps us understand how being the "only one" in certain settings — based on gender, race, or other demographic dimensions — can create a similar dynamic.

The Glory and the Burden of Being the Only One

In many fields, especially those dominated by men, such as business, politics, or tech, women and people from underrepresented racial or ethnic groups often find themselves in the position of being the only one. While this can be a daunting challenge, it also comes with a certain prestige. The "only one" stands out, drawing attention not just for their work but for their ability to break through barriers.

"Being the first or the only one is both a burden and a privilege," says Sheryl Sandberg, author of Lean In. "The privilege comes from the recognition of breaking new ground. The burden is the expectation to represent an entire demographic." This duality means that while you have the opportunity to be celebrated for your achievements, the pressure to perform is significantly higher.

Take the example of women in leadership roles in male-dominated sectors. The moment a woman steps into a C-suite role in such an environment, she is often celebrated for being the first, the trailblazer. But she also has to navigate the weight of expectations. As Harvard Business Review puts it, "Women in male-dominated workplaces face amplified scrutiny."

Underdog Mentality: A Shield Against Pressure?

Much like an underdog football team, someone who sees themselves as the "only one" can experience a reduction in the pressure to be "champion" — in this case, to maintain a standard of dominance that others in a similar position might feel. The underdog mentality can become a defense mechanism. When you know you’re the underdog, the expectations from others might be lower, allowing you to surprise, perform exceptionally, and reap the benefits of being seen as the exception.

However, this mentality comes with risks. If you bask too much in the glory of being the only one, it may prevent you from pushing for necessary systemic changes. Staying in the underdog role can lead to a complacency that undermines collective progress. Research on tokenism in the workplace shows that individuals who remain the "only one" often face barriers that can lead to burnout and isolation. By embracing the underdog role without seeking to bring others up with you, you may continue to enjoy the prestige but at the cost of enduring the burden alone.

Critical Mass: Sharing the Load

If you don't want to share the glory, you may enjoy the benefits, but the pressure to perform doesn’t reduce. To truly ease this pressure, what is needed is critical mass. When there is a significant number of people like you — whether it's more women, people of color, or others from underrepresented backgrounds — the weight of expectations is spread out. This allows individuals to thrive without being burdened by the pressure of representation.

This concept is well-researched. In their study of women on corporate boards, Rosabeth Moss Kanter & Drude Dahlerup introduced the idea of critical mass — the threshold at which having more women on boards changes the dynamic from tokenism to real representation. Kanter & Dahlerup argued that having just one or two women on a board allows them to be seen as symbolic, while three or more changes the group dynamic to one where women’s voices are normalized, and the pressure to "represent" an entire demographic eases.

Thus, the underdog mentality may indeed be a survival strategy, but it can be limiting. It’s like a football team deliberately choosing to avoid becoming the champion so they never have to experience the pressure that comes with holding the title. But to truly change the game — to shift from being the only one to being part of a more inclusive, balanced field — requires embracing the challenges of being a champion. It means pushing for structural change, advocating for others, and creating a culture where the burden of being "the only one" is no longer a factor.

Challenging Leaders: Moving Beyond the Underdog Role

Leaders who find themselves as the "only one" — whether in terms of gender, race, or another underrepresented identity — must ask themselves an important question: Do I want to remain an underdog, or do I want to drive progress and systemic change? While it may be tempting to stay in the position of the underdog, reaping the benefits of being the standout, this approach can ultimately limit personal growth and the broader advancement of others. True leadership involves not just personal success, but also paving the way for others to rise alongside you. Leaders who embrace this responsibility move beyond the mindset of proving themselves and focus on transforming the structures that create such tokenism in the first place.

For those in leadership, the challenge is clear: Are you willing to advocate for critical mass in your organization, or will you continue to bask in the isolated glory of being the only one? Progressive leadership requires the courage to champion diversity, equity, and inclusion not as buzzwords, but as fundamental values that help dismantle the systems that perpetuate the underdog mentality. By mentoring and sponsoring others, leaders can share the load, shift the dynamics, and create environments where success isn’t defined by being an anomaly but by collective achievement.

The Role of Coaches, Mentors, and Sponsors: Cultivating a Growth Mindset

Equally important in this transformation are the roles of coaches, mentors, and sponsors. Those who support leaders, particularly underrepresented individuals, need to ask themselves: What am I doing to help those I support adopt a growth mindset? A growth mindset, as defined by psychologist Carol Dweck, focuses on the belief that abilities can be developed through hard work, learning, and perseverance. For those who may feel pressure as the "only one," coaches and mentors play a pivotal role in shifting their mentality from surviving as an underdog to thriving as a champion of change.

Coaches and mentors must actively challenge their mentees to move beyond the comfort zone of standing out as the underdog and instead focus on building the skills, networks, and resilience needed to lead in more progressive ways. Sponsors, too, have a responsibility to open doors, create opportunities for exposure, and ensure that those they support are not just included but empowered. This shift toward a growth mindset allows emerging leaders to embrace the challenge of driving systemic change rather than solely focusing on personal success. The ultimate goal should be not to remain the exception but to become part of a broader movement toward inclusion, shared success, and lasting impact.

Conclusion

While the underdog mentality offers benefits, particularly the glory of standing out as the only one, it is also a form of limitation. Much like Swansea facing Manchester City, staying in the underdog role means that the pressure to be at the top is diminished, but so too are the opportunities to change the system. The real challenge — and opportunity — comes in moving beyond the role of underdog to a position where the pressure is shared, and true representation is achieved. By pushing for critical mass and welcoming more diverse voices, we can shift from basking in individual glory to creating lasting, systemic change.