The Ultimate Guide to Successful Referral Networking

Introduction

This e-book was written after 15 years of intense internet usage and working in a number of opportunities that allowed me to weigh the benefits of each system that would eventually lead to the understanding of how referral networking works.

This book is a shortened and condensed compendium of information that if extrapolated would be over 150 pages in length. There is so much to write about in each chapter, I decided to compress everything into easy to understand headings with a basic description of each heading.

A lot of my experience in web related networking comes from my successful online venture in web development and online campaigning during 2004-2006 that led to a web presence of over 1 million websites and 50 million-page views a day through a web initiative that included the use of 8 languages, and a great yet inexpensive support team of 3 friends. The bottom line, you don’t need a million bucks to reach a billion people, you only need to understand how the system works, how to manipulate information and how to spend as little as possible on the right bottlenecks.

If you wish to get a more intense understanding of how to develop your network, you are free to contact me directly at [email protected]

 

Table of Contents

1.      Who are your top referral contacts?

2.      How to make first contact

3.      How to develop close relationships

4.      Investing in research

5.      How to develop groups

6.      The importance of conferences

7.      The three circles of location

8.      Creating a meaningful message for referrals

9.      Creating an e-presence for referrals

10.  Growing a referral system step by step

11.  Establishing a focused Practice

12.  The empathic approach

13.  Emotional Intelligence (EQ) and referral networking

14.  Quality and Quantity; the referral utopia

15.  Video and referral networking

Chapter 1

Who are your top referral contacts?

When starting a referral network, you must categorize your referral connections according to their integrity, reliability, and success rate.

Integrity

Positive: This is how trustworthy your contact is, which means that they will provide a high-quality referral, possibly contacting the new client beforehand, as well as maintaining a close watch until you score a new contract from them. One of the byproducts of Integrity is that it leads to incentive-based services that you should offer your clients for a high success rate.

Detractors are contacts that give you many names, but do not get involved and might not even provide feedback to the client, which means you can only use them as a named reference only.

Reliability

Positive: This means that your contact is someone you can contact easily, will always find time to chat with you and will always do what they say. Creating a good level of communications is one of the most important issues in any success story. You have to find the balance between frequency and content. Where frequency is how many times you chat, and how quick you both reply as well as how certain you are of the content discussed.

Detractors are when some contacts are erratic, and you might get frustrated when dealing with them, especially after they have linked you and you need more information.

Success Rate

Positive: this is the number of successful results the contact has referred to you, which means it led to a contract. The success rate is under-rated as a factor since many consider the link to be enough, relying on their own ability to catch the new client. This is not a good approach. The competition is out there, and you will need your referrer to help you seal the deal. For example: if you are competing against another referred client, do not rely on your own abilities to score, use every trick in the book to win. This means, use your referrer to help you.

Detractors are when many referrals peter out or lead to long discussions that go nowhere. In other words, you might spend hours chasing a new client with no success only due to a referrers laziness, so this factor is very important.

Building up an initial category will take time and experience. However, there are some basics to creating a start list, and these include the following types:

Family: While these are biased, they do provide the best starting platform to work from. Only you can know how each family member will help you, so make sure you filter out the ones you are certain will not help. Keeping them as contacts is one thing, but cluttering up our business referral contact list is another. Do not bring sentimentality into the equation, keep the list concise.

Friends: These are like family but without the familial connection. Sometimes this works out best since the client being referred will know that you are not family, and being a good friend is sometimes the best referral anyone can get. Friends are not just kids you grew up with, they can be retail and professional business owners you enjoy a chat with, or use their services. By keeping a close rapport with everyone you meet, you are turning them into “friends” that can become referrers.

Co-workers: If you already have work experience, then these contacts are highly important. Not all co-workers are competing with you, so make sure you pick the ones you know are happy to help. There is no point in asking someone you worked with to help get clients that would compete directly with their need for clients. Keep them as contacts to discuss professional issues, but not as referral points. One pitfall to look out for is trusting someone not to poach your clients.

Clients: Naturally these are the best referrers, especially if you provided a successful service. However, make sure that your client is ready to be a referrer. You will need to ask them to be pro-active, not act as a name drop, but as an active referrer to other companies that they are working with. The best way to get them to do this is to help them, by suggesting names that you either know or suppose that they have a connection to.

Social Media Contacts: This might take you by surprise, but you can actually create some very good online friendships with total strangers. This is done when you become active in a forum or a group on a social media site that leads to a daily discussion. Some of the social media contacts can become great referrers, all you need to do is reach out with a request.

Professional Associations: Another good place for referrals is if you are active in a professional association. You might think that another professional like yourself would not consider referring you to a new client. However, most professions have specialties, and if you are an expert at one specialty you’re your counterpart is lacking, it could lead to a mutual referral partnership, where you both refer clients to that need the specialty you both provide. The best examples are in the medical and legal field, where physicians have subspecialties and rely on referrals to increase their client base or lawyers that specialize in different areas such as criminal, family or tort laws.

Conclusions

Building up a top-level referral network takes time, it takes a lot of thought into whom you place in the list. You must also listen to your gut instinct as well. When you start out, it will take time, a lot of trial and error, but do not fall into the trap of building up thousands of contacts of which only twenty are relevant. Categorize your contacts into levels of competence, and you will be halfway to success.

 

Chapter 2

How to make the first contact

A referral networks purpose is to increase income or popularity through reaching out to others you would not normally have access to. For academics, a referral network might be used to increase the discussion on topics they research and wish to become “fashionably” popular enough to be quoted. The other and main use are for increasing income through building a paying client base. Let us put this premise down as our reason to start a referral network:

A referral network aims to increase my income

We have now established this fact, and this places the whole attitude we have towards referral networking into becoming an effective tool for increasing revenue. We have discussed categorizing our contacts into levels of reliability, integrity, and success rates. In this article, we will look at how we can reach the optimum success rate. Let us define success:

Success is when a client contracts us to work for them

This is in fact only the first stage of success, success has another stage, which is exceeding customer expectations leading to a sympathetic and satisfied client. However, before we go there, we have a few things to do on the way, and the most important one is the First Contact.

So many Hollywood movies have been made about the first contact, and rightly so. For it is the first contact that decides the fate of success.

First Contact is all about preparation and intelligence. In this instance, intelligence refers to having answers to the following questions:

1.      Who is the client?

2.      How is the client related to the referrer?

3.      What does the client need?

4.      What can you give the client?

5.      Speed, Cost, and Quality

 

1.      Who is the client, refers to the size, scope, and location of the client as well as the person you will be in contact with. If the client is an individual and the only decision maker, then your work will be with them. If the client is a company or is represented by another person, such as a lawyer, you must find out if they can make operative decisions to contract your work. Too many pitches have been made to the wrong person and ended up being a waste of time.

2.      How is the client related to the referrer? This question is of key importance. If there is a direct relationship, such as family or friend, then the approach is personal. If the relationship is through an employee or successful contractor, then the relationship is business. In both events, your approach is businesslike, even if the referrer is the bosses father or wife, you must not make the mistake that you have the contract before you make the pitch. Treat all clients with the same respect and deference. The way you will integrate your first contact will be based on the referrers connection, but it will still be a professional introduction, even if it is held at a wedding or a funeral.

3.      What does the client need? There are two parts to this question; the first is pre-client knowledge. Try to find out everything about the client's needs and ascertain if there is something they need that you can offer. The other part is listening to the client after you have met them and understanding what they want and need through discussion. Lead the discussion to what they need.

4.      What can you give the client? This is a trick question since it is obvious you can give the client what he needs within your professional scope. So, the answer is actually what can you give the client beyond your scope of profession or more than your competition. If you are a carpenter, can you offer metalwork too? If you are a lawyer specializing in tort law, can you also provide court representation in family cases? The ability to provide a wider scope of services can sometimes tip the competition to your favor.

5.      A sub-issue of what you can give a client is the speed/price ratio, which means, how fast are you, and how much do you cost. At the end of the day, most clients want someone accurate, fast and cheap. The magical trinity that eludes many businesses, and finding that elusive ratio will lead to high-quality work being delivered on time and at a price that is competitive.

The First Contact Meeting

Sun Tzu, a Chinese Strategist stated that the war is won before it is even started. Bruce Lee associated his statement that he fights with the style of no fighting. Both are correct, the success of the first meeting is based on preparation. Coming in prepared with all the answers and a fundamental understanding of the client, and their needs and your competition.

Actual or Virtual Meeting

No matter where the first contact will occur, either online or in the real world, remember the three A’s of the First Contact:

1.      Appearance: always dress according to the occasion and be groomed and clean.

2.      Attitude: always smile, be sincere direct and friendly. Show empathy and be perceptive.

3.      Aptitude: be ready to adapt to any situation, know your stuff, and only let an alien invasion or world-ending cataclysm take your focus away from the target.

The First Four Words

Your first four words will always be “Hello, my name is” Everything else will fall into place after stating these five words.

Planned or Chance First Contact

Sometimes meetings will be by chance, if they are, then all of the above will apply for the second meeting, and after you state your four first words, you will listen and direct the conversation to scheduling a planned meeting. If it is an online meeting with video then remember to smile, and keep your body still, you don’t want to weave and wave on camera. If it is a real-life meeting, then make a firm handshake, dress for the occasion, sometimes you might meet a new client at a wedding, a shopping mall or even a wake. Always be ready, and always look good, once you start a referral network the days of being “the dude” are over unless you are an artist.

 

Chapter 3

How to develop close relationships

The art of developing close relationships is key to a successful refer network. Close relationships are sometimes misunderstood, and here is a brief outline of what a close relationship means in refer networking. We will tackle this issue in two stages, the first will describe the roots of relationships and the second stage will present how to build relationships.

There are five types of relationships; romantic, familial, friendly, professional, and commercial. The differences between each type are identified by the type of connection sought between the people in the relationship. While the differences between the five are distinct, there are five underlying factors that all relationships are based on and these are the keys to success in building a meaningful relationship.

The Five Factors

1.      Truth

2.      Integrity

3.      Continuity

4.      Trust

5.      Empathy

Truth

All sincere relationships are based on telling the truth. When two people are truthful, then their flow is fluid. In refer, networks telling the truth will only strengthen and expand a person reach. One issue with Truth is hiding information, while in romantic and familial relations hiding information is considered untruthful, in refer networks and business delays it is a mandatory action of information security. A successful relationship will be based on the management of information, but the information being released must be truthful.

Integrity

Integrity is both personal and professional. It is about how sincere a person is and how knowledgeable and adept they are in their professions. It is about how they act in their client’s interest and how they ensure successful completion of service, on time, every time. Integrity is your name when a client is referred to you; they should know that you provide both professional integrity as well as being a stand-up person. Integrity is something that is delivered by word of mouth, not by you, but by your contacts; it is something that is built up over time and is your “brand” or “image.”

Continuity

This is your ability to provide continued excellence over time. It involved communications, professionalism, and completion of all contracts. Continuity means that you are constant and adamant in your approach to life and your relationship. It is when you set schedules for time with your contacts, developing relations for the long shot and not the one-time quickie use and throw away. The popular statement “you come to me when you need me” is used because most people do not maintain relations, they build them up and once they are used for reaching a specific target, are discontinued. This is detrimental to a successful refer network, and all relations should be maintained.

Trust

Building trust takes time, and it is based on being both truthful and maintaining integrity over time. It is the product of truth, integrity, and continuity. Once you have a trust-based relationship, you can leverage all your needs with this amazing commodity. Yes, trust is a commodity. Banks give billion-dollar loans based on trust. Trust is the strongest of all factors since it is actually a combination of all of them, but is also a factor by itself.

Empathy

Empathy is when you show feelings as well as react to them. It is when you listen to your contacts heartbeat and not just his/her words. It is about becoming personal, showing interest in their daily issues and feelings. In some cases, offering advice even real assistance. Empathy is how you glue the other four factors together. While business and refer networks are about commercial connections, it does not mean that you should not take an interest in the client’s other issues. By being empathic and showing concern, you are breaking barriers and forging stronger ties.

Making Friends

A relationship can either be an alliance or a friendship. An alliance is when one person offers another an incentive, or when both provide an empathic response to each other. Friendship is when one person helps another without reciprocal incentive. The bond between a friendship is trust based and when broken is never repaired. The bond in an alliance is incentive-based, so long as there is a good incentive, loyalty will remain. Let’s have a look at forging alliances first. Refer networks are alliances, not friendships, they are aimed at creating incentive-based relationships, occasionally a friendship will happen, and that is a bonus, but not the focus.

Forging Alliances

Creating alliance based close relationships is a process where you forge alliances that are mutual to both sides. Uber and Lyft became a powerhouse of ridesharing because they understood the relationship of forging an alliance between a driver, a car, and a customer. Forging alliances is the best way to create a close referral relationship. Here are some everyday examples that go unnoticed but are in fact forged alliances;

Buying from one grocery store even when another might be cheaper because you know the owner. Sometimes the small differences in cost will not mean more than the personal relationship you have with the grocery store owner. However, this is a forged alliance based on an empathic or personal interface, and as such, if the owner/seller is replaced by another, the incentive to continue buying is lost. This is called forging an alliance based on empathy.

On the other tip of the scale are the membership plans that large retail outlets give their customers to retain their loyalty. The moment the incentives are less than the competitions, the customer will either open an account with the competition and leave the first or will balance the load between the two. Customer service is a major issue in incentive-based alliances. This is forging an alliance based on incentive.

Building Close Relations

Now we come to the real issue, how do we forge close relations that are not just incentive based. Relationship building is reciprocal, and it means that you must expect that the other side is either doing the same as you are, or exploiting you for gain, which is OK since you intend to gain too. These are actually six easy steps:

1.      Open Mind; always keep an open mind when dealing with people. There are many different cultures and interests that lay behind a person’s persona. You have to keep an open mind and study up about that person’s culture to understand them. Do not ridicule them or condemn them as a group.

2.      Learning about their culture; This is done in two ways, directly asking the person about their culture and interests, as well as reading up and learning about their national and cultural history. You will be surprised how quick a relationship is built when you know aspects of a person’s heritage that they usually think is not understood or known.

3.      Show interest; Don’t just show knowledge, also discuss interest’s hobbies and personal issues. You don’t have to discuss politics and sex; you can discuss sports, hobbies, art, and food. Food always opens up discussions and opens the way to many other subjects.

4.      Professionalism; This relates to the direct reason for connecting, it is the discussion of professional subjects. It is an interchanging of ideas as well as studying and researching new developments as well as being knowledgeable in the history of the profession. Some relations do not want to open up their personal sides, but they will open up their professional sides, being interested in what interests them professionally will help strengthen the bonds of the relationship.

5.      Courtesy/Respect; It’s all about respect. Showing respect and deference, being patient and smiling even when frustrated. This does not mean that you have to “eat shit,” it means that you have to show respect and be pleasant, but also be direct and stand on your ground. By standing your ground and showing backbone, you also get respect.

6.      Open Communications; this means that you are constant when chatting, discussing or greeting people. All alliances and relationships are based on a continuous dialog. By maintaining an open channel for communications, you are strengthening the bond between each other. One of the worst issues in any relationship is when one side is silent and does not update the other. This is a sign of disrespect and shows that the silent side has other objectives and purposes. If you want to make sure your alliance remains strong, be in constant contact, say good morning every day and don’t be silent.

 

Chapter 4

Investing in Research

One of the most important aspects of developing a successful refer network is knowledge. Knowledge is gained through education and experience. Since experience is something that develops personally over time, the only immediate source of knowledge is through research.

Research can be either personal or collaborative. Personal research is when you decide to study up about an issue, the collaborative is when you work together with another person in developing an idea or process together.

Research is used for a number of reasons, and they include:

Professional Education

The purpose of professional education is to enrich our own knowledge base, raise our professional capabilities and enable us to evolve with the market. It is the core of our capabilities, and we must constantly learn in order to stay reliable and meaningful to future clients.

Background Checking

The Purpose of background checking is to understand the nature and integrity of our clients. Giving us key insights into what they do, how they do it, the scope and range of their market, and the key players. There are professional service providers that can provide interesting insights, but at a cost. Only use them if the contract you are aiming for is extremely lucrative, where investing in the client's background will help win them over.

Intelligence Updates

These are methods used to glean information that is usually hidden from public eyes. This does not mean industrial espionage; it refers to the data we can glean from various legal methods, such as discussions with company employees we meet at a social function, a conference or in a forum.

Personal Education

Personal education is about gaining knowledge in subjects outside of our professional sphere. These can be either hobbies, professions, or just updates in areas that interest those around us but we personally are not interested in, such as a one person’s love of Golf or Cooking, and another’s of space exploration and yachting.

The sources of information vary and include:

Digital Resources:

Social Media

These include all the various social media sites and are used to pick up internet gossip and the occasional insight into a person or a company. They are not meant to be used as a factual source, only as a reference for factual information. Backing up what is being published as well as providing the digital gossip and word of mouth. These include such pages as Linkedin, Reddit, Facebook, and YouTube.

News Sites

These are expected to be real and reliable sources of information. They provide news on every subject possible, and there are a lot of sites. It is important to create a category of main sites, supported by focused sites. Like using CNN or the BBC as the main source and then backing it up with Linkedin or personal web pages.

Web Pages

These include personal, professional, academic, and commercial pages. Google as a search engine is also considered a source, as it acts as a filter to point the seeker to the different pages and also provides filtered images, videos, and news for all search issues.

Forums

These are usually professional meeting grounds where like-minded people will discuss an issue. In some instances, it can be highly professional and in others can be littered with subscribers interested in the subject but totally ignorant of the science behind it. Become a member of a few leading forums, do not overstretch yourself.

Blogs

These are usually personal pages updated by individuals and companies. They are not to be considered reliable sources since they are bias based, either representing a personal opinion or commercial marketing content.

Live Sources:

Professional Institutions

Most professions have institutions and organizations that concentrate knowledge on a variety of the professions subjects. Being involved in activities is a great way to meet like-minded professionals and keeps the members at the forefront of global developments

Conferences and Shows

Another professional association activity is either a focused conference or a sectoral show. Conferences call for an academic approach and are set up to exchange professional information. Shows are set up for competing companies and emerging startups to market their developments, create partnerships and raise commercial as well as public interest.

Universities and Libraries

All professions are based on an academic source, and all academic sources rely on libraries. While most libraries are now digital, leading books are still printed. The university is also a great place to meet new minds as well as experienced ones.

Social Events

Weddings, Funerals and every other kind of social event is a great referral ground to also glean information about people or companies through “inside” insights as well as from gossip.

Word of mouth/Gossip

Your local pub, bar, grocery shop, hotel and even conference. Word of mouth and gossip are great ways to get unreliable information that can be confirmed by reliable sources. Word of mouth is like social media, sensational and 99% fiction, 1% fact.

Research: The comprehensive approach

The importance of integrating all sources of information is key to enjoying true knowledge. Networking is only as good as the continuity of its performance, which means you need to constantly be involved in research.

The six tips for successful research are:

1.      Create a comprehensive research plan, utilizing all sources

2.      Set times for every kind of research every day

3.      Do not rely on only one source, always try to back up information

4.      Don’t let anyone know how much you truly know

5.      Listen, Listen, and Listen. If you want to learn, then listen. If you talk, then you are not listening and not learning.

6.      Do not presume anything

 

Chapter 5

How to Create Groups and Forums

There are two kinds of groups, the professional discussion, and the professional service.

Professional Discussion Groups

One of the greatest tools a professional can have is active participation, or even better, moderation of a professional group. Online forums produce a lot of connectivity as well as professional education. Setting up a group or forum is easy, making it popular and active is hard.

Professional Service Groups

The second kind of group is a professional services group, where different professionals come together to multiply their referral network, increasing client bases together. This kind of group is sometimes mistaken for a cooperative; it is not. This group is a number of freelance professionals coming together to help each other increase their income through collaboration.

Discussion and Forum Groups

Some groups will start out with a single concept and grow into a fully administered multi-channel operation, while the majority will remain small and on many occasions silent. Let’s take a look at creating a group and how to make it active.

1.      Core members

These are the partners that will help you build the group Referral networking is not about yourself it is about the team working with a referrer. So too is a group, while one person must have the vision and integrity as well as the leadership to start a group. That same visionary leader must be able to hold down the ego and accept that success is teamwork. A successful group will have four core members, each member will take over one section of management, and each one will have to bring in more members to create professional and meaningful discussions.

2.      Creating subjects

The success of a group is in the subjects that it decides to discuss. Each core member should be proficient in a specific subject and should act as moderator of the group. It is perfectly safe to add academic and professional leaders, professors, and CEO’s, but the moderation should stay in the hands of the core group.

3.      Management and delegation

A successful group works with cohesion, and this is reached when one person is delegated to lead the operative side, another to lead the marketing, a third to lead coordination and the fourth to manage memberships. This delegation of roles creates a fully operational group management system, and when the ego is put aside, all four should work together under the founder’s leadership and vision.

4.      Branding and Marketing

After all the hard work creating a group and starting discussions, it is time to ramp up the heat and the only way to do this is by branding the group and marketing it online. We will not go into marketing and branding details here since they are covered in another page. However, for a group to expand, it will require both professional marketing to create a serious presence.

Now let’s look at Professional Service Groups

This group is totally different from the above; this is all about creating an active collaboration to connect working clients with one group member on to the next. This means that the group has to be cohesive, flexible and with enough professionalism not to disband due to competing for egos.

A professional group will be any size from three members and above. Each member should bring a specific specialty that is not matched by another member, and each member should be prepared to be active and actively increase the group's numbers.

Management of the group is identical to the discussion groups, in that there is a founding management team where each founding member will head a specialty and populate and manage the members they bring into the group under a specific departmental heading. Any network needs leadership and management, it also needs accountability and operational excellence, and this can only be reached within a structured framework. In essence, a group is identical to any business; it has an executive that directs the group. However, unlike the business, this groups executive is only in line to help with management, so that referral effectivity will be maximized. There is no “leader,” a group by definition is a number of people clumped together. In our case, it means working together to increase profitability for everyone.

Here are the steps to set up a cohesive and effective group:

1.      Find the core members

This means that at least three professionals should come together to an agreement to work together, synchronizing activity and referring clients to each other as well as designating areas or domains that they control. Unlike a discussion group, this is not about vision; it is about experience and efficiency.

2.      Increase the reach

Each member should add more members but do not strain the numbers beyond eight. Oversized groups end up becoming too heavy and too unruly to control. The purpose of the group is to create an effective referral management team that helps each other increase their workload.

3.      Group presence

Make sure that the group has a landing page on the internet, as well as a number of discussion groups that work to enhance the quality and professionalism of the core concepts. Marketing the group as well as providing separate pages for each member will multiply the group's exposure.

4.      Success stories

Make sure that all success stories are publicized, and increase your income through successful client re-referral.

Bottom line

The reason we clumped these two separate concepts together is the fact that both revolve around group management and group management is identical. Since group management is identical, it is best that both concepts evolve together, and that creating one group should go hand in hand with the creation of the other.

 

Chapter 6

The Importance of Conferences

One of the best sources for a refer network activity is participating in conferences and trade shows. All professions have either one or the other, and most academic based professions have both. Some conferences are set up by professional institutions to societies and can be subspecialty specific, while other large conferences can band whole academic and professional groups together. Trade shows are organized by industry and are used to show off advances in development, readying their producers for investment, trade, and public marketing.

Conferences

Conferences are aimed to discuss and disseminate information about theories and practices for a specific profession or specialty within a profession. For a referral network to be successful, you must attend at least one conference a year, and if you want to be truly successful, take part, be active by presenting at a conference, either an abstract, a poster or even a lecture. There are two ways to become active and participate in a conference, these are:

·        Calls for participation; where you send in your abstract, poster or lecture

·        Instigate a conference; where you create a group of like-minded professionals and create a “mark the date” call for a conference.

The first way is the easiest to get into an established system, and if you participate in at least two or three conferences every year, your name will become known amongst your professions peers.

If you are an active member of a society or institutions or want to create such a society, you must create a group whose aim is to create a professional society. As a founding member, you will help lead the way to an annual conference that will grow beyond the group, and become a society with the executive board, organizing a committee, meetings, discussion groups, and even a peer review journal.

If you prefer not to participate or be active, then attending a conference is the next level of importance from participating. As an attendee you will meet many peers as well as companies that attend conferences, marketing their wares to the participants. Creating a network through attendance is the same as participation, but without the professional expertise, level added to increase the effect.

Most conferences are accompanied by “trade show” area’s that allow the companies involved in the profession, of which some will be sponsors of the conference, helping to fund its production, and will showcase services and products that are directly related to the subject of the conference.

Trade Shows

These are different environments to conferences, while they do amass people together, the professions are varied, and the focus is on a product, not a theory or practice. Industrial sectors or marketing specialists prepare trade shows to promote awareness of the latest developments and allows companies to showcase their products and expertise.

Attending a tradeshow is to increase your knowledge of actual advances in tools and ways to improve your trade, as well as connecting you to companies and services that you be able to collaborate with in future developments.

Networking

While you attend a conference or a trade show, you must be ready for some intense networking. Building up a network of connections, friends, and clients with the intention of creating a referring network of professionals that can help expand your income generating client base.

Not all members of a referral network will directly bring you, clients, in many instances they will help you create power bases, groups that help each other and through that help draw new clients through collaboration. By being part of the development of new idea’s, concepts and even products, you automatically gravitate new clients interested in advances in your field of expertise. Emerging technologies and concepts are all great ways to attract investors and clients interested in your professional research.

If you only participate and are not active in either research or presenting in a trade show, then you must concentrate on building up connections with other like-minded professionals, or companies that you could develop a working relationship together in the future.

Mixing Real with Virtual

Modern conference and trade-show marketing are done online. Conferences can also be online, although these are still far and few, and virtual conferences are a growing concept that attracts certain specialties to discuss and share information online. All real-life conferences (and trade shows) discussions are continued post conference and usually take place in forums. Where a specific forum is designated during the conference and members can join and participate in a continuing collaboration of discussions.

News and PR

Any presentation can and should be marketed via news and online PR work. If you are active and participate in a conference, it is not enough to rely on word of mouth; you must be active in “marketing” your presence online. Create a page dedicated to your participation in the conference, and link any of your concepts or idea directly related to this. Some companies and clients will actively seek the leaders in a profession using search engines, so you must use SEO content and online marketing techniques to maximize your potential exposure. The stronger your online presence, the greater your strength in attracting serious referrers. Professional referring is common, where someone will refer you because he or she have heard of you or met you and collaborate with you. Creating a name through conference attendance will generate a lot more referrals then most realize. One profession that excels at this is the medical profession. Where leaders in specialties are marketed by their peers based on their exposure as leaders in practice. Leaders in practice are only known based on their publications and attendance in conferences and trade shows.

 

Chapter 7

The three circles of location

There are three ranges or scopes of business; they are local, national, and global. Each business is defined by its location, and each location defines the type of business. For instance, a self-employed plumber will most probably be local; a plumbing company might be national, a construction plumbing contractor or a high-rise plumbing consultant might be global. Invariably, the product defines businesses they sell, which can be a service or a tangible item. When producing a tangible item, then global borders are only restrictions set up by your supply chain. When providing a service, if it requires in-house activity, then you are restricted to location, this restriction is part of your business model, and if your service can be offered digitally, then you can be in every location globally online.

Deciding on your location is part of your corporate vision, and your corporate vision is partially based on your budget. This means that you must decide where you want to reach, and build up a step by step process to reach it.

In the instance of a self-employed plumber, it means either defining yourself locally or deciding to go nationally with expansion programs set into specifically targeted milestones. If you are an accountant, you are not limited to location; you can go online and become global.

Once you have defined your reach and location, it is time to build up your referral network to help increase your workload, increase your reach, and realize your expansion.

Local

Setting up a local referral network requires more real-life activity then virtual.

Local referral networks are personal and require a lot of advertising using popular local methods that can include posters, billboards, signposts, printed paper adverts as well as advertising on local cable channels. A website is necessary to support all marketing methods. Setting up a local referral network requires creating partnerships and friendships with retailers, service providers, and taxi/rideshare drivers. Family, school childhood friendships, and happy clients make up 95% of the referral network.

National

Setting up a national referral network requires equal real life and virtual activity.

National referral networks require a bit more planning since they require logistics, partnerships and structured referral networks. The use of forums, groups, conferences, and trade shows are all part of the national referral network. Online marketing replaces local, and referral networks become more complex as you add acquaintances and professional associates to the list.

Global

Setting up a global referral network requires more virtual than real life activity.

Global networks can be both the easiest and the hardest to set up. It all depends on how you approach them. If you are a freelancer providing a global service, it can be quite easy to create a “virtual” referral network. If you are an academic, or profession that requires recognition to gain clients, then you will need to participate in a lot of online forums, discussion groups as well as support them with global conference participation and attendance. Artisans and Manufacturers of products can skip the local and national stages and just concentrate on a global network using online e-shopping techniques. Their referral network is based on customer reviews and satisfaction as well as online marketing techniques for branding and popularity.

Deciding which location is best

As we mentioned at the beginning of this article, location is product based, and products set the location, deciding how to will lead you on different paths.

Let’s look at an artisan creating cultural products. Their target can be local, if they live in a tourist-rich location, as well as global if they make an online presence. They can skip the national market since their global image will cater to this section of the market. Their referral network will require connections with hotels, restaurants, tour guides, taxi drivers, rideshare and other gig economies as well as maintain a website, e-shop presence, and blog. They need to build up a list of satisfied customers too, who will send more clients to their site or physical location.

Freelance writers will choose a different approach, concentrating only on the global location. Building up a long list of profiles in various freelance sites as well as creating a social media presence and aim to use satisfied clients to help promote their services to others. Writers will also use local connections such as family and friends to reach local businesses requiring services, without having to rely on the internet to reach them. However, online marketing and referral networks are the keys to writing professionals.

Software development is global, in fact, this is one of the few professions that is purely global, and only global initiatives should drive a software developers vision. This does not mean you should not find local clients, but you have to factor in “off the shelf” solutions that put “bespoke” solutions out of business. If you develop third-party add-on’s, you are automatically aiming toward a global market. If you are seeking a consultancy or local software coding position, then local is better than global, but that means you need to bolster your referral network with HR specialists that can help you find work.

Manufacturers and producers of products that want to grow from a national level will need to take it step by step. Since logistics, as well as production processes, need to grow appropriately. That is why it is best to start out nationally and after being branded and known, set up a global network. Since manufacturing is a production intensive process and depending on the product a regulated and standardized process, going global immediately is a mistake. One of the biggest mistakes a “local” or small manufacturer will do it try to sell more than they can produce or distribute. The best referral network will aim for national recognition and growth first.

 

Chapter 8

Creating a Meaningful Message

Refer networks are wonderful tools to help speed up growth and expand the range of influence an individual or company requires to increase their client base. However, having successful referrers aid, you reach clients will only go so far. You will need to supplement the refer network with a strong presence. Your marketing presence will include several initiatives that you will have to create and adhere to, and one of those initiatives will be your message.

Just to understand what we mean by the message:

·        Your corporate message tells everyone who you are, what you are selling and what makes you stand-out you from your competition. It is the main message you communicate to your target market, clients that will purchase your product or service via various methods.

·        The message must be identical in all your methods of communications, and includes your company name and motto in all your taglines, websites, online pages, and campaigns as well as verbally in person, on signage, and in other marketing materials.

As you can see, a message includes your identity as well as your vision, it is a mix of icon, words, and pictures and must not only convey the message you want to send out, it must also create a subjective dependence and urgent desire to buy your service or product. Examples of successful messages that evolved over time include:

·        Coca-Cola

·        Google

·        Milk

·        Fitness Centers

Notice that there are focused messages such as coca cola, which was built over decades of continuous marketing work supported by a good product as well as sector messages such as Milk, which is funded by dairies and dairy farms, and supported by medical and nutritional documents that promote you to buy milk products. Googles message was very simple; it is a search box in the middle of a screen, it focuses the surfer on the search engine only. Fitness centers use various photo incentives of fit men and women and focus their market to different customers based on budget and fitness levels.

How to create “The Message.”

1.      First, decide what it is you sell and to whom you are selling it. This is the key to creating a successful message.

2.      Create a Logo and Company name that encompasses your identity. If you are one product or service supplier then use the product, if you offer a mix, then create a graphic identity that best covers your area.

3.      Choose your colors; this is important since it defines how you will be viewed by your market.

4.      Create a motto, a short sentence of no more than five words that describe your vision.

5.      Write a short paragraph describing what, who and why you are, do not discuss or mention competitors. Focus your descriptive paragraph only on yourself and your products or services.

You will need to create variations/options for each stage; this will allow you to choose which mix of identity factors delivers the best message.

Creating a message for service providers is similar to manufacturers or retailers of products, but with one difference. Service sellers concentrate their message on themselves, while manufacturers and retailers concentrate the message on their products. This makes the message intrinsically different and more complicated for service providers.

Why is it easier to create messages for products?

Because products can be assessed and compared with physical, functional, and cost attributes. Services are harder to compare since the human factor makes gauging concepts such as trust, efficiency, quality, speed, and communications much harder. Creating a message that focuses on the positive attributes without sounding overconfident, boastful, and pushy is one of the arts that PR specialists specialize in.

Consider the Politician

Politics is the ultimate referral network system; it is about selling a person through the persuasion of others by others. A politician must create a cadre of supporters that will refer his/her attributes to others, leading to a continuous (pyramid) referral network that expands as it grows further from the source. Actually, it is more of a circle than a pyramid, like a circle you see when throwing a stone into water. A politician must create a motto, just like a presidential campaign where mottos such as “Make America Great Again” was used to propel Trump into office. Presidential campaigners use similar colors, usually around the stars and stripe US Flag. It is not relevant if you supported the politician or not, it is the success of the outcome that proves the effectiveness of the campaign. Most successful campaigners create specific issues and create an unwavering stance on each issue.

Service Providers like Politicians

A service provider must copy the concepts of a Political campaigner, since his message is identical in nature to that of the Politician, but delivering a professional reason to support. While the message building technique is similar, the referral network is completely different, and that is an issue discussed in another article. The bottom line of the message is to grasp the minds of the client, catch their attention and make the potential client WANT to hear and know more. It is about showing off all the positive attributes, never showing any weaknesses and promising to provide the best service possible.

Product Sellers must Boast

Unlike the service provider, a product seller has to exaggerate and boast the superiority of the product to all other alternatives. The message has to be graphic, bombastic, colorful, with enough information, sometimes even too much information to WOW the consumer and to catch the sale. Anything goes in consumer product messages, and there are plenty of examples that show success reached through the most abstract of concepts. One such obscured message was the 1990’s “Colors of Benetton” which showed gory scenes full of color, that the consumer would then associate vivid colors with Benneton’s clothes. Or Coca Cola’s 1970’s I’d Like to Buy the World a Coke song, sung by The New Seekers, and remains a strong song that is immediately remembered by many as well as associated by all to Coca-Cola.

 

Chapter 9

Creating an e-presence for referrals

The internet brought about great opportunities for business to expand in one easy access route; a keyboard and a screen. The internet is all about eyes and culture, the psychology of the internet is similar to the psychology of body language.

The first rule of engagement in body language as well as in e-presence is persuading the viewer within the first three seconds.

A web presence is a combination of web-pages, networking, advertising, and search engine performance. Let’s take a look at all the different modes of internet application to create an e-presence for referrals.

Building a web presence also has rules, and they are:

1.      Focus on your objective

This means that the objective is to increase your income not your contact list. One of the biggest mistakes in creating a referral network is that many users end up transferring their objective to creating a large network of connections and forget about the real reason they are building their web presence. Loosely translated this means “don’t turn the path into the objective.” 

2.      Build an interlinked network of pages

Make sure you cover every possible angle of the internet. This means that you need to build web pages (more than one) that are linked to each other. You must open social media pages that you are capable of updating on a regular basis. Build a profile on as many referral networking sites as possible. Create Blogs (and Vlogs if necessary) to update information on a constant basis. Use feedback on other sites as a means to convey personal messages.

3.      Create an effective SEO campaign

For every web page and presence, you have, create an SEO campaign to show that site on as many first search pages as possible.

4.      Make sure you can update information easily

Do not fall into the mistake of building up static web pages that you cannot update. If you cannot find the time to update your presence, then do not open it. On the other hand, having a lot of dead-end pages that link to active sites is one type of viral advertising, but only do that if you are ready to “know” where every dead end is located.

5.      Schedule your maintenance

Maintaining sites and social media requires time and patience. Make sure you create a schedule where updating information is performed on a daily basis. Also, remember that some sites require feedback, such as forums and social media. Be prepared to answer questions and chat with people online at set moments that you decide.

6.      Balance Work and Pleasure Hours

Remember, the internet does not sleep, eat, and have a family. You do. So, you need to think of the internet as your physical office. What are your office hours? When do you want to open your office for work? If you don’t set your routine, you will crash under the constant weight of demand, the same way you would crash if you stayed in your office 24/7.

e-Presence Pages

There are many types of pages to choose from, so let’s look at most of them here.

1.      Web Sites

These are either personal pages, company pages, e-shops or other information processing sites that are tailor-made to your specific needs. It is sometimes good to have more than one site addressing your services or products. However, this is dependent on the type of product you sell. The retail sector should have more than one site (e-shop) to sell products and should have multiple products being sold on other e-shops such as Amazon and e-Bay. Service professionals should have one main site and possibly a site for every specialty that are linked together, a production/manufacturing/fabrication company should have one main branded site and e-shop pages for their products.

2.      Social Media

Don’t fall into the trap of “needing” social media presence on every social media site, unless you are capable of supporting each and every page you open. There is nothing more off-putting then hitting a dead-end Facebook page. Set up social media pages only if you can update them regularly and are willing to interact with all kinds of unusual people. Instagram is a photo site where you can showcase your services or products, as well as photos of happy clients.

3.      Business Networking

Unlike social media, business network sites are aimed at “referral” networking. Linkedin is the world leader providing a number of opportunities and membership plans. There are many online business network sites, don’t fall into the trap of joining everyone, most are dead ends, and will confuse searchers seeking a serious service. When you do decide to use a business network site, make more than one page for yourself and your business, but send the same message.

4.      Blogs and Vlogs

These are extremely important sites; you can join a community or create your own using WordPress, which is the leading blog method. YouTube is the best option for Vlogs, and creating a subscription and personal page on YouTube will enhance your presence only if you are willing to commit and create video content. All blogs should be maintained on a regular basis, allow for comments to maximize their potential as well as pull discussion and interaction your way.

5.      Professional Associations

Societies and organizations have personal member pages; these are extremely useful for promoting your professionalism and academic stance. Try to join as many organizations as possible; it will help build up a professional image.

6.      Wiki sites

There are a number of “Wiki’s” out there, they are all peer-reviewed, but if you can create pages on them, do so. Wiki’s tend to be believed, and they enhance or solidify a reputation.

7.      Google app sites

Google has a number of “app” sites such as “travel” which is useful for supplementing your network. These pages are used to enhance your Google+ profile, which you should create and maintain for professional as well as personal reasons.

8.      Academic Alumnus

If you have a college/university degree, create a full profile on the alumnus page.

9.      Mobile Messaging and Chat

Supplement all your web presence with many ways of reaching you. Viber, Skype, WeChat, Whatsapp, Telegram, Google Hangouts and more. Make sure you create as many communication options as possible. It increases your presence as well as offers free communication services to cut down costs and speed up discussions.

10.  Journals and Citations

If you are an academic, or a professional that writes about your services or products for trade or peer-review Journals, make sure your journal and citations links are accessible from all your various pages.

11.  News Feedback

Some news sites allow for feedback to articles. Use this chance to reply to articles that are linked to your profession or product. Don’t hide behind an anonymous profile, create a real profile so that it can be linked back to you.

12.  Customer Reviews

All e-shops worth they're while having customer review sections. Make as many customer reviews for products you have bought and used. These also help build up an image of reliability.

13.  Search Engine Adverts

Create a campaign using site advertising such as Google AdWords, Linkedin Adverts, Facebook Ads, etc. Make sure all your web pages are SEO compatible with your campaigns. You will find that as you create more campaigns, you will be editing your sites to become more compatible.

14.  Site Adverts

Some online marketing companies provide site-specific ads, unlike search engine ads which aim to promote your site over search engines, site-specific ads are aimed at using Google AdSense which is how you set adverts on your site, so too do other sites allow for adverts to appear on their pages.

15.  HR Resume Pages

Go to as many HR sites and open a resume, you don’t need to open an active search, just open a resume page so that your professional data is reached here as well. It also helps when companies do seek someone like you and can lead to contract jobs, not just part-time or permanent positions that might not interest you.

16.  E-Books

If you are willing to take the time to write up informative e-books about your service or interstates, it is worthwhile creating 10,000+ word e-books and publishing them online. You can post them on business networks, or sell them via Amazon or other media companies. E-Books add to your professional credibility, especially when you make “how to” books. Supporting them with a Vlog increases their potential exponentially.

Chapter 10

Growing a referral system step by step

A referral system is a network of relations that are built through various methods. While there are many supporting methods to help develop a solid network as well as creating an online presence. The actual referral system is about creating that elusive list of referrers that can be reached efficiently and managed easily.

A referral system is like any other organizational construct, it has a head, yourself to manage it, a database of connections organized into categories and stored on your mobile device, business and social networks that contain different connections you are in contact with, a web presence for a dropping zone to market your services or products, and a message that is targeted to increase your income through direct sales or professional collaboration.

To build a referral system is to plan ahead and then work according to the plan. In other words, project management. Do not approach referral networking a laissez-faire manner; you will only end up confusing yourself as well as creating an extremely inefficient system that will tax your time and produce bad results.

Project management

When it comes to project management, there is a lot of hesitation by people thinking that this is some kind of management science, where Prince2 and PMBOK reign, demanding you become adept in their nomenclature. This is far from true. Project management is all about organizing yourself, creating a budget and setting milestones.

Metrics

If you want to complicate matters, you can add key performance indicators (KPI’s) which are metrics to evaluate the performance of a specific task. These KPI’s can come in useful if you want to evaluate a specific task you have set yourself, such as setting a date and deciding what result should be reached by that date. The KPI will be a % performance based on this. Writing has great KPI’s where you can set a 1,000-word article to be written in 60 minutes as a KPI, if you reach that target in 30 minutes you are successful producing a 200% performance rating, if you only complete it after 2 hours, you are underperforming by 50%.

Organization

The organization is the core of project management; it is keeping organized control over all activities. It does not matter how many tools you use to manage the project, whether you create critical paths or decide in Gantt’s. At the end of the day, it is all about organizing and managing your time and performance.

The Referral System

A good referral system has four attributes:

1.      A list of reliable contacts

2.      A comprehensive e-presence

3.      A powerful and meaningful Message

4.      Constant Maintenance and Evolution

The step by step process

The four attributes of a good referral system have to be created, and working on them in parallel is to advisable. There are some stages that come first, and others second, etc.

The First Step

Create your message. We have an article on this subject, here is the link, any good referral system will start out by defining who you are, what you can offer and how you will deliver it. Before you start to build any network, you have to know what you are doing it for. While you are building up your message, you should perform initial population of contacts.

Step 2: Creating the Initial List

An initial list is the first one you create when starting your referral system. It is populated with your closest and most reliable contacts and will grow over time. Your contact list is constantly changing, but it has to start somewhere. As you create your message you start to build the initial contact list, this leads you to start building a web presence.

Step 3. Developing a Web Presence

Once you have created your message, it will include your color scheme, logo, and actual worded message. It is time to open up social media sites, business networks, referral sites, HR sites, web pages, blogs and vlogs and define your target audience so that you do not waste your time “selling” yourself to someone that does not want or need you. In other words, if you are a UK based plumber, you don’t need to sell your services to an Amazon bush tribe. Or if you are a cryptocurrency trading consultant you do not need to sell your services to the IRS.

Step 4. Marketing

Now that you have a web presence, you have a message and an initial referral network it is time to start marketing yourself. This does not mean you have to immediately create a major Google campaign or buy space at the next super bowl. It means you have to start contacting your referral network and get them working for you. Start moving your fingers, and heat up the keyboard. Start to develop online relationships, develop new contacts and partnerships. Plan to attend conferences and trade shows. Schedule daily meetings and discussion groups.

Step 5. Maintenance

Once you have set the ball rolling it is time to maintain your hard work. This means updating your online presence through blogs, vlogs and answering emails, forum messages and discussion groups. Maintenance is when you maintain your connections, strengthening your referral network through continuous and active participation.

Step 6. Sealing the Deal

Bottom Line: a referral network is a means to an end, it is the path and tool to increase your income through the sale of services or products. Don’t fall into the trap of turning the referral system into your private universe. It is not home nor a life; it is a set of tools delivering you a way to reach clients. Which means that the final step is sealing the deal and getting the contact to become a client. Buying your services or products.

Step 7. CRM

As with any business model, initial sales are great, but returning customers are greater. Maintain a customer relations system to back up your referral network, is the final step in the process. It is important since over time the CRM will become a major part of your referral network system. Sort of like a perpetual motion machine that will slowly take over the inertia of your business and drive clients to you without you having to expand your referral network actively.

 

Chapter 11

Establishing a Focused Practice

When setting up a referral network, it is important to concentrate on what is important, and that is focusing your network on providing you with increased income.

There are a number of ways to focus your practice, and they start by focusing on the building your referral network which will help you increase your reach and get you more introductions to work contracts.

What is Focus?

The focus is a method to concentrate on completing a specific task. However, it is not just about eliminating outside influences from taking your focus away it is about perfecting your task and continuing to perform future tasks in the same manner.

The focus is found in manufacturing industry quality and production cycles, it has other names, such as Kaizen and 5S methods. These are methods used to organize the workplace and make a production process efficient.

The same is with setting up a referral network and environment to increase your income.

The Five Pillars of a Focused Practice

Plan:         This means that you must first create a plan, a project outline and define your objectives.

Define:    This means you must define each task according to its relevance to the success of the objective.

Organize: This means you must organize out your objectives based on the tasks to be performed.

Act:           This means that it is time to stop planning and begin producing.

Evolve:    This means that you must continue to evolve your process by adapting to problems and issues as well as to research and change.

Let’s put each pillar into practice, for example; you want to set up an operations engineering consultancy for manufacturing plants. You have a specific set of skills that enables you to perform expert factory layout for high workflow efficiency. Here is how we would focus your approach.

Plan:           Planning is about managing your referral network and work environment to create successful work/employment contracts. You will define what you can do and how you can do it, write it down and create a message. Explain why you can do this, what is your experience as well as your success stories. Now plan out your e-presence requirements, what do you need to reach as many clients and where will they be able to read up, order and converse with you online? You will need a website, a forum for Q&A and links to references and citations of your work as well as links to conferences and presentations that you have made or will make. Your plan must start with your target and only then start to build up the tools and resources you need to reach it.

Define:      Start by defining which market niche you want to attack. Manufacturing covers every science known to humanity, so you should decide what your strongest sectors are. Are you a specialist in liquid (chemical) facilities or in Automotive? Perhaps Aerospace and Defense? Or FMCG and Hospitality? By defining your sectoral scope, you are setting your market and referral network to a specific range. Now you begin to create your network of connections, where you concentrate (focus) on people that are directly connected to manufacturing companies. You don’t need to make the location local, you can go national, which will broaden your marketing reach. This is the stage you define who will help you reach your specific targets, such as which online company will help you design your website, create an online marketing campaign, and help with SEO issues.

Organize: Once you had a plan and defined each section, you will now organize all the activity to work in a cohesive manner. You are building up your referral network using all the tools at your disposal (as discussed in the article – link here). You are managing all the companies and people that are helping you define your e-presence, and you are managing the budget used to pay for each activity. You are also scheduling your time between building your referral network, developing your e-presence and actually working with clients as you do so. You are also active in conferences, trade shows, and practical research.

Act:             This is when you have started to receive requests for information or been given leads from contacts to open negotiations. This is the moment you have been working hard to reach; it is the focus of your endeavors. The path you chose and tools you used to get here was the means, not the purpose. This is the purpose, closing the deal and starting to work with new clients, all the time maintain and evolving your network to produce more. You will be visiting clients on their site, giving quotes and trying to seal the deal. If you are overloaded with acceptance quotes, it is time to grow, and employ engineers to represent you, or to build partnerships and collaboration with other freelancers.

Evolve:      All the time you are focusing on your business and increasing your potential, you are also evolving. You. are adapting your style, changing the nature of your business to match your progress and keeping your edge over your competition.

Bottom Line

A successful referral network is built to expand, and a successful practice is designed to increase income and enable the individual to grow from a self-employed individual freelancer into a company providing services to many clients. With growth comes a change in personal focus, where at the outset you focused on every detail, you will find that you will start to delegate issues, and focus on larger pictures. Just remember one important fact, no matter how big you grow, never lose sight of your roots.

 

Chapter 12

The Empathic Approach to Referral Networking

There are many approaches to successful management as well as to successful sales. However, there is only one approach to successful referral networking, the empathic approach.

Empathy

Empathy is defined as the ability to understand and share the feelings of another. Note that there are two functions in operation here, understand and share. They are two separate functions, and we will explore both as well as layout the way empathic networking is achieved.

·        Empathic Networking is a Science

The Definition of Understanding

To understand is to perceive the significance, explanation, or cause of something as well as be sympathetically or knowledgeably aware of the character or nature of something or someone. Note that there are two distinct meanings to Understanding. The first definition uses the word perceive; this means the ability to see, hear or become aware of something through the senses. The second definition uses the word sympathetically which means in a way that attracts the liking of others. So, what do we have?

In an empathic context; understanding someone is about using all our senses to comprehend what we are sensing, and we do so with an intent to attract the other person.

The Definition of Sharing

Sharing is defined as using, occupying, or enjoying something jointly with others.

When we combine Understanding with Sharing we get:

Understanding what we are sensing with an intent to attract another person’s attention, so we can share our knowledge with, or sell our services, or products to them.

Now that we have sorted out the meaning of empathic networking let's look at how we can build a successful empathic system for our referral network.

Remember, empathy is not about being kind and nice, it is about attracting attention with the intent to make a sale. It's basically fishing with a juicy worm and not an empty hook. Having stated this “cold statement” we do not intend to use empathy for false pretenses, however, remember, not every waiter that smiles at you might actually like you. They are smiling because they want to retain their jobs and get a big fat tip.

Empathic Partnerships

Empathy is about understanding the other. Using all your senses to comprehend what makes them produce the best results for your needs. It is about observation and patience. A referral network is built on partnerships, where one person is willing to refer another to a third party. By nature, a referral network is binomial, where one person requests the aid form another and creates a reciprocal dependency based on trust. One person will vouch for another expecting that other person to perform according to the vouched reason. This binomial attraction is strengthened when an empathic approach is used to strengthen the attraction between both sides.

Empathic Responses

Most businesses and deals fall due to a misunderstanding of intent or content. Language can be complex, especially when different cultures are involved, or when the time you take to explain your position is not enough to fully deliver the message, or you delivered it, but it was misunderstood. This means you need to deliver it again, in a different way.

In some instances, the other side will state quite bluntly that “You don’t know what you are talking about.” In instances when you are misunderstood, you will need to be extremely patient and use an empathetic approach, which means you will need to persuade the other side of your good intentions by deflecting their attack in an empathic manner. Teach yourself to smile, and to maintain an air of indifference even when under attack. This means that you have to smile, even when being insulted. In response to the above retort, most people would react either by getting on the defensive or attacking. Empathic masters smile, don’t reply for a few seconds, giving them time to say, “Then I have not yet made my self-understood, let me explain again.”

Communications is all about listening and observing. It is not just ears; it is eyes too. You have to look at the body language of the other person, comprehend where they are coming from. What is their cultural, educational and professional background? For instance, a military background leads to impatience with waffle, military personnel like short and concise messages, that deliver the core of the subject in a structured manner. In contrast, a theoretical scientist would want as much information as possible about every possible source of information that deals with the main issue as well as its collateral issues.

Empathy is about understanding which person you are talking to and aligning your approach accordingly. This will automatically attract them to what you have to say.

Empathic Dialog

There are two kinds of people that make up partners in deals. The personal type that seeks to discuss details not relevant to the issue, they are usually interested in hobbies, culture and small talk. The second type is the all business type that is focused on the job at hand and is not interested in making small talk.

The empathic approach will be able to discern which one of these types is sitting opposite you, and you must adapt your approach accordingly. However, there is one “contingency” approach that can soften the “all business type,” and that is when health, financial or other problems invade their lives. This affects their performance, and when they are to communicative, you should send a message asking when will they be available, and if they are all right.

For example, when you are working on a project, and you need a reply to a question, and there is no reply for a period of time that is unusual for the other side, you would write “Hi, I haven’t heard from you in a while, I hope you are feeling well and that your silence is due to a holiday. If you are on holiday, I wish you will have a great time, and please contact me at your earliest convenience. If, however, you are unwell, I wish you a quick recovery to the best of your health.” This statement basically shows the other side that you care about their health. A typical response could be “I was to busy on another project.” Or, “Thank you, I was on holiday.” No matter the response, your message was an important empathic approach that makes the other side consider you in a more “personal” manner, even if they are all about the business and not the person.

 

Chapter 13

Emotional Intelligence (EQ) and Referral Networking

Emotional intelligence was first mentioned back in 1964 in an article published by Michael Beldoch, but it was not until 1995 that it gained fame when the psychologist Daniel Golman published a book titled” Emotional Intelligence” now abbreviated to EQ.

The common consensus identifies Emotional intelligence as a person’s ability to understand and control their own emotions and the emotions of others.

There are three subsections associated with EQ

?                    The ability to connect to emotions and use them for thinking and problem-solving tasks;

?                    The ability to control emotions, which includes regulating your own emotions

?                    The ability to promote happiness and relaxation in other people.

Why is this different to the Empathic approach? It isn’t the empathic approach is about attracting another person’s notice through understanding them. EQ is about understanding their strengths and weaknesses and controlling them! However, before you can control another person’s emotions, you need to know how to control your own emotions, once you control them, you can then begin to control others too.

?                    Your worst emotion to control is fear! Once you can overcome this, the rest is easy.

Just like a yogi teaching you how to meditate in order to understand your body better and develop mind control skills or a karate teacher teaching you “kata’s” to develop immediate physical reactions to certain situations, EQ also has certain procedures and tests to advance your abilities. 

Remember, there are no real negative emotions; there are only negative applications or dominance of emotions on your actions. Fear is your hardest emotion to control, it is your worst enemy, whilst it is important to have it since it is a survival based emotion, it must not be allowed to dictate your other emotions. An instance when fear is useful is when you are standing on the edge of a cliff, without fear you would take an unnecessary risk that could lead to your death. So, in this instance, fear is a positive emotion. Anger is also an emotional response based on how you accept information; you must be able to control your anger completely. Once you have taken the necessary steps to control these two emotions, the others will come into line. Another important issue is over-excitement of emotion, such as happiness or awe. If you become excessively happy, you can become hysterical, and if you become excessively awe-struck, you become a moron. All your emotions must be in check in order for you to truly appreciate every-one.

Redirect your focus

This means projecting your desires onto the object of your desire. Imagine, in your mind, the target you wish to acquire; now you must prepare yourself both mentally and physically to attain it.

How is this done?

Tip 1. you must negate all negative thoughts, concentrate only on the positive. This means you must only think in terms of creativity and productivity.

Tip 2. Focus on your self-awareness, try to imagine watching yourself from the outside, how do you look and act? Then concentrate on how you feel from the inside, how are you reacting, feeling?

Tip 3. Start to self-regulate your emotional response, don’t let others regulate your actions. Instead, you decide how you will react to any situation.

Tip 4. Improve your motivation by thinking of ways to increase output, reduce the time and generally improve your work environment. Think positive, optimism is as addictive as pessimism, but with much better results.

Tip 5. Increase your empathic abilities by trying to help others solve situations. Show both compassion as well as actual aid in solving the situation.

Tip 6. Increase your social network and skills, basically, continue to attract new friends both online and in real life. Increase your circle of influence through the number of people you know and relate to. (Don’t try to suck up to bosses! Try to talk to them and to those in lower positions; you never know who has influence or access to information)

Tip 7. Revenge is for losers. Instead of applying your time and efforts to seeking ways to make others suffer for indiscretions done to you, concentrate on attaining your target. Too many companies have fallen, too many lives have been lost, and too much pain has come from revenge. The very thought of “getting even” is infantile, the hardest thing to do is to ignore. By ignoring (not forgiving), you replace your valuable time and energies from concentrating on THEM to concentrating on the real target, YOU! How YOU succeed, how YOU progress and how YOU reach your goals.

Redirecting your focus onto YOU is what you must do every day when you listen to how other describe their lives, what they like and what they do, it does not mean you must like it or do it too. You are not a sheep, neither are you a wolf, you are just you. You do not need to listen to jibes and meaningless criticism; you must listen to your inner voice, look at your goals and continue to aim for them

Live your life, not theirs! Remember you only have one life, don’t waste it by living according to how others think or tell you. On the other hand, there are certain social norms that you will need to adapt to maintain your focus.

Socializing

Whilst there are golf clubs and fitness centers that are actually social gathering sites, like watering holes, they bring many types of people together. There are also winter sports sites which are considered a major defining sport as well as museums and art centers; every country has a different social gathering point dependent on the weather, culture, and religion of the country. In all countries charity work is considered great social interactivity since it connects you with other minded people but also has a productive outcome, it helps those in need. So, you must find out what are those social network centers that best suit your lifetime desires and join them. This is not being a sheep, its being goal minded, focusing on advancing yourself through every social media available.

Once you have joined one, your work is far from over. Now you must start to get involved in the daily activity, increasing your reach by occasionally volunteering, find out about the board, is there a “friends of” unit, such as in a museum. Go to this and join it. Start to get involved in their schedule, become an integral part of their activity. Over time you will find you are a member of a number of boards, and occasionally you will find certain people like you as members of more than one. You don’t need to be rich; you just need to have time and energy. You will suddenly find yourself being invited to all kinds of parties and meetings. Use this to advance your career, map out who is who at each board, and start to build a map of influence.

Remember by using your new-found control over your emotions, you can easily adapt to any new environment, and can easily control how others perceive you.

Boardroom tactics are also very important. When sitting in a boardroom meeting you will find many types, but they can be categorized into four groups; the quiet ones, these try to hide and generally don’t talk, they are scared that if they talk and upset their boss, they could lose their position. The over-talker, this is the exact opposite, they try to take over the discussion at every point, trying to prove how brilliant and irreplaceable they are, then there is the fact spouter, they usually aren’t inventive and rely on a mass of data and percentages to prove how capable they are, and are mainly ”yes men” and finally there are the visionaries, they tend to constantly come up with new ideas but don’t actually offer much data to back their ideas up. All these people are important as a group; they interact to create cohesion (except for the silent ones, they are useless in a boardroom and waste space.) The ideal boardroom executive is someone that combines data and facts with inventive and innovative thinking, and does not talk too much but speaks exactly what needs to be said. They must also argue when necessary; true leaders don’t want yes men, they want someone that will make the company go forward, that will manage their department properly for the benefit of the company.

Leaders Vs. Tyrants

There is a very interesting fact about great leaders, as opposed to tyrants. Great leaders were all sympathetic, perfectionists, original thinkers, very patient with those that needed extra help but impatient with those that didn’t. They were all witty, funny and highly intelligent. Another interesting fact, not all successful businessmen are leaders, some of them are merely great businessmen. Now, unless you have an original idea, or access to venture capital, or have a cousin that is CEO of a major corp. that wants to employ because his mother told him to, I suggest you learn EQ so you can start to stand out at work and evolve.

Professional Networking

Like socializing, the business sector has its own groups to belong to. In some industries, they come naturally to medical societies. Basically, you chose the society or societies your profession and experience is best suited to. Join and become an active member. Go to chapter meetings, national and international conferences, if necessary work on articles, abstracts, and presentations. Become a known speaker. Or perhaps apply for voluntary board role, although it helps if you are well known, and that happens through your application and appearance. Once you start to advance in the society, don’t stop, use business networks to build up more presence, start to link them. Befriend peers from other companies, mingle with peers of all levels, but also try to meet with those in higher positions, it will help you advance. In some instances, being elected to and voluntary executive position in society will help you advance your application for a new job. Everyone wants a leader in his or her profession, and there are two ways to gauge a leader, either through his or her fame from publication or inventiveness or through his or her popularity online and in the society. Remember, if you are President of a Society, you can be called upon to give an official opinion in court or on TV…it always helps to be in that position.

 

Chapter 14

Quality and Quantity; the Referral Utopia

If you have a linked in profile, then you most probably came across the acronym L.I.O.N. This stands for Linkedin Open Networker. This is a group of people that are not interested in the quality of their network; they are only interested in quantity. This came out of a response to Linkedin’s policy that members should not link to people they do not know, which is sort of defeating the object of the site. However, it did become obvious when people started to amass tens of thousands of links and started to mass mail them, or create mass groups without the linked member's approval. The only exception to this rule are “influencers” these are people in positions that make others want to be linked to their knowledge, such as CEO’s of large companies, Educators and Opinion makers, or Politicians.

Bottom line, a true network would only contain connections that have one of the following attributes (categories) to the linked profile:

1.      They are family

2.      They are personal friends

3.      They are school/college friends

4.      They are co-workers, employers, or employees

5.      They are peers in the same profession

6.      They share the same professional or personal interests

7.      They have a business relationship

8.      They are HR recruitment personnel

9.      They are satisfied customers

These are the types of people you want in your referral network, and anyone that does not fit into one of these categories is not an immediate requirement to your network. A good network is based first on quality and then quantity, where the quantity aspect will grow out of the quality base. (It rarely happens the other way.)

The Growth of Quality

When you start to build your initial referral network list, you should categorize everyone you know in the above list of 9 categories Depending in your age and experience; you will find that the network populates in preference as the above list of nine is presented. Where family and friends are the starting blocks of the network, and professional connections take up the second level leading to the third level being taken up by work-related friends, the final level is satisfied customers.

Over time, as you gain more experience, the categories shuffle around, similar to shifts in a Pareto table. You will find your professional connections growing more than your family and friends lists and your work-related and satisfied customers coming in second place. This does not mean that the categories are shuffling their importance, it just means that they are growing in number.

The satisfied customer list will grow differently when you are a service provider or a product manufacturer or retail seller. The service sector has fewer clients, while the retail business can have millions. The type of referral differs between the two, where a service referral network is based on a customer’s experience and will provide a steady growth line. The retail customer will either be a returning customer and write a good review, which will automatically generate more clients and the growth pattern will increase and decrease according to your marketing capabilities.

The family list will remain static, as it invariably does unless you marry into a tribe.

The professional network will grow according to your participation in your profession. Forums, conferences, and publications will add to your popularity, as well as increase the number of peers you meet.

The hobby section will grow if you cater to hobby issues (chess, yachting, cooking, etc.)

Critical Mass

There is a moment in every referral network where you reach that critical mass point that either tip to automatic referral or implodes. If you are a retailer, then your network will most probably reach an automatic infusion critical mass, and your products will be bought through market inertia created by your marketing and customer satisfaction levels.

It is rare that a service network reaches an automatic infusion critical mass. Usually, when a service network reaches critical mass it is due to overpopulation, and the individual loses control over their network, mismanaging connections and taking on too many jobs. The fall out is an implosion of quality, where the clients end up being frustrated and leaving the network or providing negative feedback.

The Quality Quantity Ratio

Finding that special ratio, where the network works for your benefit, is the key to a successful referral network system. The ratio is very simple; it is based on your ability to provide a quality service 100% of the time. Even if you expand your services, increase your exposure, and use partners or add employees, the network should grow to accommodate the changes in size.

The same goes for a retailer, where the network needs to be supported by an efficient CRM. We discussed the critical mass issue favorably with retailers, however, if the CRM is bad or lacking in strength, the effect will also lead to implosion.

Bottom Line: Maintaining control over your network is key, it requires skill in knowing how to categorize your network and how to manage them as you grow.

Quantity is not quality, and good quality will always lead to increase in demand for quantity.

 

Chapter 15

Video and Referral Networking

The video is the new trend in digital communications. It is used as an alternative to telephone calls, multiple member meetings, conferences, and marketing. It is the gold of digital media, and when used correctly, and efficiently, can add a lot of strength to a referral networks growth. 

Let’s take a look at the different users for video in a referral network.

1.      Video Calls

This is the standard use of video for communicating today and comes in many apps such as Viber, Skype, Whatsapp, Google Hangouts and more. Video calls reduce the cost of talking to anyone when used over a WiFi network. They enable us to see each other, which opens the way to view body language and facial expressions. It also allows us to use the camera to show what is happening in specific locations. Video calls are more personal, and as such is a great tool for creating a personal touch in a referral network. Video calls are global but are limited to the bandwidth available.

2.      Video Conferences

Like video calls, these are for including multiple participants in a conversation. A video conference allows us to create a group discussion, where brainstorming issues, as well as basic meetings, can take place. VC’s include boardroom discussions, multi-disciplinary meetings, referrer-client-consultant meetings, and just about any constellation that enables many participants to see each other in an online conversation. VC’s allow for participants all over the globe to meet in one conversation.

3.      Video Meetings

These are organized professional meetings, unlike conferences, these are alternatives to organized conferences, where participants are called upon to make presentations and discuss their findings in a group. Video meetings use technologies that enable participants to make presentations and share files of data. These are a powerful tool when making an online presentation to a new client.

4.      Video Presentations

Unlike meetings, these are focused presentations in video form. They allow the presentation to be set in a format that can be downloaded and shared, such as retaining a pptx format. Video presentations are a great way of saving professional presentations that are used to convey slides of data for future use.

5.      Video Advertising

There are two types of video adverts, the professional advert that is created by a PR and, marketing company and a personal upload. Professional adverts can range from small shorts to full-length featurette films. The personal videos are usually used by professionals to showcase an issue or item; they are usually taken by smartphones and posted in a YouTube category or uploaded into a personal web page.

6.      Video Education

e-Learning is split into two methods, the online person to person method, where a live teacher is training a student or students in a virtual classroom. The second is training videos uploaded to a site, even into a social media forum such as YouTube. The main difference is that an online school is a scheduled affair and requires organization and management, the educational videos can be spontaneous or produced, but also provide a detailed explanation of the subject the cover.

7.      Video Support

Similar to video education, there are two versions, the live support where a person will take the call and aim to help the client, or an explanatory video that is used to describe a process or how to mend/fix/repair a situation.

A video is a powerful tool in the right hands, and when a combination of all seven types are used by a referral network, they increase the impact of the message, the content, and the service that the individual or the company wants to use to increase their referral networks power.

There are three issues to contend with, and once you overcome these issues, you will be able to maximize the use of videos in your system.

1.      Bandwidth: not all users have access to large enough bandwidth, this leads to erratic conversations, slow downloads, and frustration. When you have a client in a bad internet area, try to circumvent the use of video, unless it is for educational or support purposes.

2.      App compatibility: make sure you use every app possible, that means using iPhone and Android apps so that every client you are in contact with will have the appropriate app. Many times, we are faced with a situation where we use one app and the client another.

3.      Pre-call testing: Many times, we set up a call or schedule a conference, and find out that the audio is not working, or the video is bad. Take your time to set up the call at least half an hour before it happens. Check your equipment, even if it's only a smartphone. Make sure your audio and video are working properly. If not, make sure you have an alternative available.

Bottom Line

When using video, make sure you understand your own message and get it across fluently. Video calls have one downside, if you mess up the presentation you don’t have a second chance to edit it out. So, make sure that if you choose this medium you are ready for it. Treat a video call and conference as if you were going to be in the actual presence of the other person or persons. This includes your personal appearance as well as how you convey the message. A successful video call will always outdo a successful audio call.

 

Conclusions

Thank you for downloading and reading my book. There is so much more to write about, such as negative feedback marketing and shock graphics. With so many variations in building up a referral network as well as a complete and comprehensive presence, online and offline, you can effectively reach billions of customers through just 100 quality referrers.

What I have tried to present to you in 15 chapters are the basics that can be used to maximize efficiency and reach optimum results. You can reach a lot of people, succeed in marketing yourself and increase your income as well as web and offline presence if you are ready to take that step.

For more information you can contact me at [email protected]