Two Hundred (and 75)

Today, November 8, 2020, marks two milestones in my life. First, it is my seventy-fifth birthday. Second, this article is number 200 for me on LinkedIn. Both are relatively unremarkable accomplishments. With the average life expectancy at birth in the U. S. being somewhere in the neighborhood of 78 years, seventy-five is no big deal, and given the nature and content of most of my articles, you might think they don’t represent much of an accomplishment either.

Truth is, the 200th has been harder to get to than the seventy-fifth.

Those 199 previous entries have had from 5 to over 283,000 reads each. Some have been good, others mediocre, and the one with over 283,000 reads- controversial.

Contrary to what you might think (and what I might say), the words for these articles don’t just fly off my fingers. And when they do, those words are often misspelled and require correction. While ideas or themes may come easily to mind, fleshing those ideas in takes time. 

For the past week, I have given a great deal of thought to what I would say in my two hundredth article. No matter where my mind went to seek for a topic, it came up empty. Finally, two things came together to provide me fuel for this particular fire- my upcoming birthday and the effects of the COVID-19-imposed house arrest. Allow me to elaborate.

Seventy-five is a significant birthday. It marks ? of a century of existence. The most famous person that I am aware to have lived exactly seventy-five years is one of my literary heroes. Mark Twain, who was born with the arrival of Halley’s Comet, an event that happens every 75 to 76 years. He often said, “I came in in Halley’s Comet, and I intend to go out on it as well.”

His wish was answered. He died in 1910, the year the comet returned.

My entry into the world was a little less auspicious, but not unremarkable, nonetheless. I dropped in two months early, weighing all of 3 lbs. and 2 oz. In 1945, the odds for survival were not in my favor, but I weathered the storm and, with the exception of a tour in Vietnam, where I got hit in the head with a Chi-com grenade that didn’t explode, mine has been a relatively danger-free life.

That doesn’t mean it has been uneventful. Like everyone else who lives this long, it has had its ups, downs, victories, defeats accomplishments and disappointments. As you might imagine, living alone with a cat and two dogs leaves you with a lot of time on your hands. Couple that with the virtual house-arrest effect of the pandemic, and a great portion of your life can pass before your eyes every day.

And I can honestly say that in 2020, I have taken more looks at my life than a Super Bowl replay. Shakespeare wrote: “The evil men do lives after them. The good is oft interred with their bones.” And so it is that my reflections often land on things I would rather forget than remember. But, as we all have to do, I face those things head-on and try to put them in their proper place. Trust me, if you haven’t had any of these moments yet in your life- moments of “facing the music”, you will before all is said and done.

Reflection is nothing to fear. It helps you frame your life to yourself. When it happens, be kind to yourself. The past cannot be undone. How you look at it can change the way you live out your future.

I am certain that I would have experienced the self-reflections associated with “75” without COVID-19, but the logistics of the pandemic has intensified things. Unable to get out and about, I have spent an inordinate amount of time working at home and watching YouTube while doing so. Out of that have come four things I would pass on for your consideration:

1.    Don’t be afraid to laugh, think and show your emotions. On March 4, 1993, a dying Jim Valvano became the recipient of the first Arthur Ashe Courage Award. Helped to the stage by his friend Dick Vitale, Valvano, who would die less than two moths later, gave one of the most inspirational speeches ever. Famous for the phrase, “Don’t give up, don’t ever give up,” the speech contained the following words that have resonated with me ever since; “To me, there are three things we all should do every day. We should do this every day of our lives. Number one is laugh. You should laugh every day. Number two is think. You should spend some time in thought. Number three is, you should have your emotions moved to tears, could be happiness or joy. But think about it. If you laugh, you think, and you cry, that’s a full day. That’s a heck of a day. You do that seven days a week, you’re going to have something special.” I can’t watch that speech without being moved to tears. Many men think that tears are a sign of weakness. They are wrong. Tears are a sign of humanness, not weakness.

2.    You CAN get along with folks that are different than you. Among the many types of videos I watch are those featuring animals that you would expect would not be compatible getting along with each other. I’ve seen dogs swimming with porpoises, chimpanzees befriending coonhounds and a trio of a bear, a lion and a tiger living together as best friends. One of the most moving was a video in which there was unexplained action every night at a game preserve full of water buffalo. Every night a strange visitor would come out of the jungle- a predator- a huge leopard. Did the leopard come to attack? No. He came to sleep with and groom one of the buffalo- a female who had served as his adoptive mother when he was a baby and his biological mother had been killed. Every night, this natural enemy would come out of the jungle, lay down and sleep with his “mother”, then return to the jungle in the morning. If animals can do this, why can’t people?

3.    Be kind to others who have not been as fortunate as you. Similar to the “natural enemy” videos are the ones in which humans find an animal in distress, rescue it, return it to health and then, either set it free or keep it as a pet- generally without care for the cost of it all. The stories are touching and reveal that the flame of human kindness can burn brightly. If we can be so kind to helpless animals, we can be equally kind to our fellow human beings.

4.    Show appreciation- NOW! This year, I was visited by a totally unexpected honor when I was selected for induction into the Bellwether League, the national Hall of Fame for people working in the healthcare supply chain. Prior to this year, less than 120 people have been selected for the honor, and I had never for a moment thought that I would ever be one of them. Once I learned that I was supposed to give a four-minute acceptance speech at the virtual induction ceremony, I began watching acceptance speeches from the Baseball Hall of Fame. Every one of them was filled with two elements- appreciation and humility- appreciation for all those who helped them along the way and the humility to understand than no one ever makes it to the peak of the mountain without the help of others. Most of us will never be Hall of Famers, but all of us are beholden to the efforts of others on out behalf. Don’t wait until it’s too late. Take time to thank the folks who have helped you along the way. And for God’s sake- tell the people you love that you love them. You will never regret it.

Willie Nelson once said, “Amateurs copy. Professionals steal.” I am attaching two videos to end this post. The first is the acceptance speech of Yogi Berra when he was inducted into the Baseball Hall of Fame. The second is mine (it begins at 38:02 on the video). The difference between me and Willie is that I did attribute the source of my last statement. 

Now sit down and write your HOF speech and share it with the ones you love. You’ll never regret it.