'Twas The Night...mare Renovation -Sherry Holmes Christmas Story
Mike Holmes
President at The Holmes Group, Contractor, TV Producer & Host, Founder Holmes Approved Homes & Mike Holmes Inspections
Sharing a video my daughter produced because, well, we can all use a laugh right now.
‘Twas the Nightmare Renovation, when all through the house,
There were cracks and holes for every squirrel and mouse.
We were in the basement, on a couch for our bed,
While the never-ending reno slept overhead.
A claimed "jack of all trades,” we trusted this man.
Instead he ruined our house, took our money and ran.
This job was a joke, this job was a bust,
It was covered in tears and divorce dust.
The windows they were missing, the walls how they bowed,
It was clear to us now, this was not up to code.
The roof, it gushed water like Niagara Falls.
They compromised structure, removing load-bearing walls.
A letter was sent, as our final prayer,
In hopes the RIGHT contractor, soon would be there.
When out on the road, we could tell by his walk,
Up our driveway he strolled, on our door he would knock.
With all the right products, from shingles to spray foams,
We knew in a moment, it must be Mike Holmes.
A helmet on his head, and a tool belt he did carry,
But it wasn't just Mike, he brought Michael and Sherry.
Mike's look, it was stern, and his arms they were crossed.
They'd help finish this job, no matter the cost.
"Everything is all wrong," he said with a frown,
Grab your tools at once "it's all coming down!"
Now, MICHAEL! now, DEREK! Now, SHERRY and BLAKE!
It's demo time, find something to break.
Take down this old porch! Take down this old wall!
Now smash away! Smash away! Smash away all!
The shingles have failed, Steve will show you the proof,
He'll replace them at once, and give you a new roof.
You'll have all new electrical, but it's not me you should thank,
Meet my master electrician, his name is Frank.
You get what you pay for, it's hard for me to stay calm,
New windows, new doors, thanks to my pal Dom.
They were paid not in money, but in handshakes and hugs,
Making the home critter-free, from rodents and bugs.
With a final wink of his eye, we couldn't believe our luck,
As he packed up his tools, and hopped into his truck.
But we heard him exclaim, as he drove out of sight,
“ENJOY YOUR NEW HOME, BECAUSE WE MADE IT RIGHT!”
White Sea Roses of Maine
3 年sometimes such a reading just makes you have the thinnest of smiles - the "man to be trusted" was a Maine Town Selectman,(GOP) , who put the "header" ABOVE the existing floor level, Jack-hammered out part of the cement floor (and LEFT it that way!) , and then installed the FIRE-DOOR backwards, so it OPENS INTO the building!! my sister's place, she's now saving up to FIX it Right. town name upon request. he also REFUSED to give a written contract. Welcome to Coastal York County Maine
Land Management and Transactional Professional // Dipl.M.M. (Hon), SR/WA, CLO, Dipl.Law.Clerk
4 年Just from the Header sentances, this was us and $10k stolen
Broker at REMAX Escarpment & Niagara Realty Brokerage Inc.
4 年This is Great, I cannot wait for the sequel!
Retired!! Commercial Account Manager at Earthlight Technologies
4 年Adorable!!