Turning Trials into Triumph: A Timeless Tale
Passover, the Jewish holiday commemorating the liberation of the Israelites from enslavement in ancient Egypt, begins in the evening of Saturday March 27. The story of the Exodus is long and complex. Its message is relevant any time, but perhaps especially now. It is a story about the desire for freedom from systems of oppression, plagues, overcoming adversity, and resilience. As we mark a full year since the pandemic upended all of our lives causing immense pain and suffering, the light at the end of the Pandemic Tunnel seems to grow brighter every day. Yes, we will be celebrating yet another festival of freedom in a global pandemic, but there has been a lot of progress and good COVID news recently. The world is coming back to life with the rise in vaccinations and the drop in infections, hospitalizations, and deaths. Experts may define the end of the pandemic in different ways, but I believe everyone would agree it’s getting closer. We’ve turned a corner and are moving forward making strides as individuals, a nation, and a global community.
Whether global or personal, people experience adversity. At some point everyone faces challenges. On occasion, life will give you lemons. No one has a lemon-free path. The following three elements are crucial to courageously face life’s difficulties: trusting that you can cope with the hard stuff, believing that you can get through the rough patch, and having faith that you shall overcome. Self-trust doesn’t mean that things will be easy, but it will give you the strength and driving power to face any challenges. Fear and doubt are par for the course. When the going gets tough, dig deep for the courage to stay focused on what’s possible, all the things you can do to keep moving forward. When faced with negative situations, find and conjure up positive thoughts: think about happy memories and past accomplishments. Explore your self-limiting beliefs and engage in constructive self-talk. Reframe your thinking from limited to limitless. It’s not your options which are limited, but the information you currently have.
There will be days when big lemons will hit you on the head full force knocking the wind right out of you. But a more common occurrence is probably what is called in Yiddish the “Oy Vey” moments, those times when things do not go according to plan, and you find yourself dealing with life’s little annoyances. It is those times when we look up in frustration crying out loud: “Why is this happening to me?”
The “Oy Vey” moments, the "Woe is me!” moments, have three elements:
- They are unexpected
- They are unwanted
- They are unpleasant
These moments suck, but they're a fact of life. The truth is though that what matters most is not the obstacles in the way, but rather how we see them and react to them. When life throws you a lemon, make life take it back. How? Develop strategies to work through setbacks. Emulate the great leaders who embody the capacity to lead in the midst of a storm through uncertainty and complexity. They show grace under fire and find a path forward through the dessert, high water, and parted seas. Whatever, the circumstances, it is your job to find that path, to navigate the negatives in a positive way. Be a CEO: Create Extraordinary Outcomes. How are you performing as the CEO of your Self, the captain of your ship?
Here are 3 self- empowering strategies to turn the “oy veys” to “oh yays” – Reflect. Reroute. Respond:
1. Reflect: Self-check
Move from reaction to response.
- What is the challenge?
- What is just fear talk and what is within the realm of possibility?
2. Reroute: Self-knowledge
Identify the lesson in the experience.
- What can you learn about the situation, yourself?
- How can you get around the obstacle?
3. Respond: Self-reliance
Focus on what you can do to move forward.
- What actions can help mitigate or solve the problem?
- What is the best way forward?
Learning how to reroute and respond effectively are critical resilience skills. To bounce back from setbacks, develop your three P's: Be –
1. Positive:
Maintain an optimistic outlook. See your glass as half-full, the opportunities right in front of you. Allow yourself to believe that the best is going to happen, that you will withstand adversity and will triumph over hard times.
2. Pragmatic:
Maintain a realistic outlook. Approach challenges and unpleasantness in a productive way. Find credible resources and gather information that would help you analyze and accurately assess the situation - the facts and reasonable options.
3. Perceptive:
Maintain a fresh outlook. Look more deeply at everything you experience with an open mind and an inquisitive spirit. Pay careful attention to the details but think holistically beyond the facts. When things get complicated, simplify them into basic steps, easier pieces.
When you suddenly run into roadblocks, don’t confuse the path with the destination. Just because it’s raining now and the path is muddy, doesn’t mean you aren’t headed for clear blue skies.