How to Turn An Ending Into A New Beginning

Not every Fresh Start comes about because we want it. Sure, most do. We anticipate New Year's Resolutions. We get excited about moving to a new place or starting a new job. But sometimes, this entire process of starting over can feel more negative than positive. We might be leaving someplace where we'd rather stay. Even if the outcome is desired, such as a divorce, there are many memories and baggage to sort through. The new beginning that follows can feel more overwhelming than exciting.

?So, how do you deal with these situations without losing your sanity? How do you do it in such a way as to take something positive away from the experience?

?The answer isn't as complicated as you might think. No, it's not simply a matter of a fresh mindset, though this can help. Sometimes, your endings will take more work than this to shift them into new beginnings. Let's find out how.

Start with Saying Goodbye

There comes a time when you will have to let go of the past to embrace the future. It's entirely up to you what this looks like. Some people find journaling about their past experiences helpful. Others need to talk and work things through. Whatever you decide, remember to give yourself time to process. Some baggage takes a little time to unpack. It's never good to rush the healing process.

Look for the Silver Lining

Well, maybe this fresh start wasn't at the top of your list, but this doesn't mean it isn't a good opportunity to accomplish something you've intended to do—hunt out the good in the situation. Who knows, you might even have reason to celebrate this fresh start you didn't see initially.

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Put Your Head on Straight

Once you've started looking forward again, it's time to take stock of the situation. What are your options? What do you need to accomplish, and what would you like to do? The nice thing about a fresh start is that it's a perfect opportunity to fix more than required. For example, you might need to move right now, but this doesn't mean you can't work on a few other things on your wish list, such as making sure you're moving somewhere with a home gym or workout option nearby to make a new exercise plan a little easier.

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Take a Reality Check

Of course, only some things on your wish list should be dealt with immediately. Some can't be because they might require funds or other resources unavailable to you. Others are a bad idea because it would be too much of a fresh start. There's much to be said for pacing yourself and not setting yourself up for failure. What's practical?

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Take Stock of Lessons Learned

If you're being thrust into a change, chances are you didn't have the greatest outcome in whatever was ending. The good news? You can still take away something good from the experience. Before you get too deep into the fresh start, take a moment to ask yourself what you learned from the previous situation. There are many lessons to be learned in endings, with the knowledge that will serve you well as you go forward.

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Make This a Choice

No one likes being told what to do. If you feel like this fresh start is being forced on you, you'll find it easy to be resentful and angry no matter how good you've found or what goals you've set. There comes a time when you need to step back and say, "Yes, I do want a fresh start," making this situation your choice. This puts the control back in your hands. It also means that whatever happens from here is exactly as you want it to be.

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Adjust Your Mindset

No fresh start will succeed if you're still angry and resentful over the change. This is especially true if you feel forced into things. You might have to do some things you'd rather not do initially, but this doesn't mean you can't embrace the change and still get some good out of it. Start looking for the best outcomes. If you need an added adjustment to the situation, try making a list of all the positive things that can come from having a fresh start right now. Find an outcome that excites you and can make you feel at least better about this fresh start, if not excited.

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Know What to Hold Onto

No one said you had to throw out every aspect of your life just because you're engaged in a new beginning. Some things from my old life were good and will be valuable moving forward. Take stock of these things, making a list if necessary to remind yourself that you already have some great resources you can use in this fresh start.

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Take Breaks

New beginnings can be daunting, especially if much work is involved, whether physical or mental. Remember to work in a bit of relaxation wherever possible to keep yourself from becoming burned out or overwhelmed by the new situation. Also, a little playtime can do wonders for keeping your mood up, which helps if you are struggling to feel happy about this change in the first place. The nice thing? You don't have to go all out on these breaks. Even having an afternoon off to spend outside or with friends can change your mood for days. Remember that you get the most benefit from breaks when you take them regularly, so be sure to add them to your schedule nicely spaced out so they come often enough to be beneficial but not so often as to keep you from making positive strides on your fresh start.

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Appreciate Just How Great You Are

You just came through a bad time, and you're still going. This alone is worth more than anything else on this list. Take a moment to realize how far you've come and how wonderful you're moving forward.

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Take it One Step at a Time.

Nothing happens overnight. There will be various stages to your fresh start, involving many smaller goals and lots of small successes. Celebrate each milestone as it comes, and you'll feel like you're getting somewhere (because, of course, you are!)

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Ask for Help

No one ever said you had to take on a Fresh Start all by yourself. There's a lot to be said about support systems. Invite trusted individuals into your process by letting them know what you're doing and asking for their encouragement. If you have mentors, go to them for advice. Or find a mentor if you don't have one already. Remember, the key here is that you want support for your New Beginning meaning the last thing you need are naysayers or people who will only be critical or put down your efforts. This is the perfect time to create boundaries and keep those out while at the same time keeping your tribe close where they can encourage you the most.

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Persist

How are you at being stubborn? If you're still not feeling it and are struggling to get going on this new beginning, the best thing you can do is keep plugging away. Go back through this list and remind yourself of everything here. The funny thing is that this persistence will pay off in the long run, especially if you can keep a positive attitude and be open enough to try new things. Sooner or later, the fun will creep in, and you'll realize what a glorious opportunity this is. In the meantime, the very fact that you're still carrying on is something to take pride in. You're still in the game, and you're still trying. Take a minute to give yourself a hand for being amazing!